Winter Moon
by Kristen Elizabeth
Summary: One day Jacob woke up to find a beautiful young woman in his bed. Jacob/Nessie, post-Breaking Dawn.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to us.

Author's Notes: I actually started this story at this time last year, but never finished it. Now that I've completed my big pre-Twilight fic, I decided to resurrect my post-Breaking Dawn one;) And after seeing New Moon for a third time, I really wanted to give Jacob something to smile about. I hope you enjoy this!

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Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

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_There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls. - George Carlin_

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She never remembered crawling into his bed, but her family had lost count of the number of times they'd gone to wake Renesmee and found her curled up in innocent sleep alongside Jacob Black's long, muscled body.

When she still looked like a little girl, no one minded. Imprint notwithstanding, Jacob viewed Bella and Edward's young daughter with the eyes of a devoted big brother. Nessie, after all, was only half-vampire and was often merely seeking out Jacob's warmth on the coldest of Oregon nights, body heat she wouldn't find in any other bed in their new house. Snuggled up against Jacob's broad chest, her tiny fingers resting over his beating heart, Nessie slept more deeply than she did even when nestled between her mother and her father.

But although only seven years had passed since her dramatic entrance into the world, one day Jacob woke up to find a beautiful young woman in his bed.

And two extremely angry vampires glaring down at him.

Immediately, Jacob put his hands up in the air. "I didn't touch her!"

His sudden movements woke up the bronze-haired beauty. Lifting her head from his chest, Nessie blinked her bottomless brown eyes and looked around, sleepy and confused. "I did it again, didn't I?" She glanced up at the vampires with a sheepish smile. "Morning, Daddy."

Edward Cullen sighed, unable to maintain his fury when his daughter looked at him like that. "Nessie, come on. It's almost time for school."

In the past, Nessie would have tumbled from the bed with the adorable bounce of a very small fairy. Now, she slipped out from under the covers and rose to her feet with all the grace of a lithe goddess. "I'm sorry, Jake," she said, her tangled curls cascading over her shoulders. "See you at breakfast."

Her father followed her out of the room, leaving a half-naked and almost defenseless Jacob to deal with Nessie's mother.

"Bella," he started, sitting up in bed. "I swear, I'll start locking my door if I have to. I know what this looks like."

Her golden eyes were narrowed at him to the point where he wasn't sure his old friend could even see him through the thin slits. Bella was quiet for a long moment, as if choosing the best possible combination of words. "She's only seven, Jake. She might look eighteen, but she's not."

"You think I don't know that?"

"I think..." She stopped. "I don't know what I think," she admitted, sinking down onto the edge of the bed. Right then, she looked more human to him than she had since the day she became a vampire. The day she'd brought Nessie into the world. "What am I supposed to do? You imprinted on her."

"That doesn't mean I ever have to lay a hand on her."

"Don't give me that crap. I know what the whole wolfy imprint thing is about. Making little wolves."

"We don't even know if Nessie can..."

Bella cut him off with a dangerous snarl. "Don't even go there, Jake!

"Hey, you went there first!" Under the full weight of her vampire glare, he continued, "I will be whatever she needs me to be. And if one day she wants me like that..." He smiled wryly. "I should be so lucky."

"At least you realize that," Bella snapped. But it was impossible for her not to stay mad at one of her oldest and dearest friends. She sighed softly. "She just grew up so fast. And I know I should be grateful that I got to have a child at all, but it's only been a few years. Sometimes I go into her room expecting to find her sitting up in her crib, wanting to play patty-cake. And then I remember..." She snorted delicately. "Physically, she's almost the same age I was when I had her."

Jacob scratched his fingers through his short black hair with a sigh. "Believe me. I'm aware." He stood up, towering over her as he put his massive hand on her slender, solid shoulder. "But Bella, you really don't have to worry. I don't think she thinks of me any differently than she does Emmett or Jasper." He shrugged. "I'm her friend, an uncle, really. Nothing more."

Bella rolled her eyes. "Why are men such idiots?" she muttered to herself.

"What do you mean?" he asked, frowning.

"Jake." Bella stood up from the edge of the bed, but it didn't do much to close the gap between their heights. Still, she reached up to lay her cold hand against his cheek. "She's falling in love with you."

He stared at her, like she'd slapped him across the face. "That's...no. No." He took a few steps back, shaking his head. "Why would you say something stupid like that?"

"For kicks, of course," she scowled. "Because jokes about my seven year-old being in love with my oldest friend are hilarious." Bella folded her arms tightly after a few moments of tense silence. "Since you're not that great of an actor, I guess this really is a shock to you."

"I swear to god..." Hanging his head, Jacob balled up his fists. "I had no idea, Bells."

She acknowledged this with a question. "What are you going to do now that you know?"

"No idea," he admitted. Seconds slipped by. "Want the truth? The whole and nothing but?"

"You know it," Bella replied.

Jacob lifted his gaze to meet hers. "My body tells me that she's old enough and I'm old enough and she's my soulmate." Before Bella had the chance to react to this, he continued, "But in my head...I still see the little girl who invited me to a tea party with her dolls." His lip curled up in a snarl. "Disgusting, right? I should be locked up."

"Jake," she sighed softly. "I don't think that."

"Edward would. Actually, he wouldn't bother with jail. He'd just outright kill me." Jacob snorted. "Do you know how hard I have to concentrate to keep from thinking certain things around him?"

Bella arched an eyebrow. "Edward isn't really in a position to judge you. He was over eighty years old when I was born."

"True." Another minute passed. "Ever wonder what our lives would have been like if none of this supernatural crap was true and we were just normal?" Jacob finally asked. When she said nothing, he nodded ruefully. "Yeah, I didn't think you did. Life without Eddy." He flared his hands dramatically. "Not worth living."

"Don't be like that."

His apology was only half-hearted. "Sorry. My head's a little messy right now." He drew in a deep breath and exhaled slowly. His abnormal lung capacity gave him just enough time to consider his options. "I think I should go back to La Push. Today."

Bella stared at him. "You're going to leave? Just like that?"

"What choice do I have, Bella?"

"There has to be something other than just up and disappearing!" She glared at him. "That's never the right solution. Trust me."

"This won't be anything like that," Jacob assured her. "I'm not going to cut myself out of her life completely. Even if I wanted to...I couldn't." Jacob squared his shoulders, shaking off the pressure that squeezed his heart at the thought of never seeing Nessie again. "But I can take myself out of the equation for awhile. Put some distance between us. Maybe it'll make things...easier."

Bella worried at her lower lip with her sharp teeth. "You'll come back? You promise?"

He struggled through a reassuring smile. "Like you could get rid of me that easily."

The scent of bacon drifted up the stairs from the kitchen and Jake's stomach rumbled loud enough to break the moment. Bella watched him pull on a shirt and head down the stairs to the kitchen where Esme was preparing a breakfast that would have fed the whole family, but was only meant for him. As soon as he was gone, Edward appeared in the door.

"Is it true?" He stepped into the room. "Is he really leaving?"

She nodded. "But tell Rosalie to hold off on celebrating. He'll be back." She closed her eyes when her husband drew her close and pressed a kiss into her hair. "I want him to be happy, Edward. He deserves it."

"Believe it or not, I agree with you."

"Why wouldn't I believe it?" Bella looked up at him with a secret smile. "You've always been more forgiving than me."

"I know what it's like to face the possibility of a very long and lonely life. And I wouldn't wish that on anyone." His expression darkened. "Not even the werewolf who loves my daughter."

"Technically, he's the shape-shifter who loves our daughter." She wrapped her arms around Edward's waist. "Are you going to kill him?"

"No. But only because it would hurt Nessie."

"No thought at all for the well-being of our future son-in-law?"

"Bella, really." Edward made a face. "Must you put it like that?"

Arm in arm, they left the bedroom and started downstairs to join the rest of their family.

* * *

"It's going to snow on Christmas." With half of her beautiful face hidden behind her oversized mittens, all Jacob could see of Renesmee were her warm chocolate brown eyes as she looked up at him. "Aunt Alice promises."

Because she wanted him to, and there wasn't anything he wouldn't do for her, Jacob smiled at this news. "I predict an epic snowball fight," he said, putting a finger to his temple, pretending to see into the future as her aunt did. "Your father and Jasper versus Emmett."

"You won't be helping Uncle Em?"

Suddenly, the Oregon woods seemed much colder. Jacob took a deep breath. "No," he said after letting it out slowly. "He'll have to cream them on his own." The words he'd waited all day to tell her were going to hurt them both. "I won't be here for Christmas."

Watching her face fall made him feel like the worst scum of the universe. Standing there, unable to do anything to make her smile again, was nothing short of torture.

"You're leaving me?" she whispered.

"This isn't about you, Nessie." He tempered his harsh reply with a gentler, "I just have to go."

"You don't want to, though," she finally said. Her voice, although soft and musical, seemed loud within the empty, silent woods. "I can see it in your eyes." She tilted her head to the side, her long, bronze ponytail falling over her shoulder. "But you're still going. Why?"

"Family obligations," he lied. "Pack responsibilities." He swallowed heavily. "You won't even miss me."

Nessie's smile was sad. "It'll be like someone cut off my arm and you know it."

Somewhere in the distance, an owl cooed. "Nessie, when I get back…" He stopped to let out a rueful chuckle, his warm breath visible in the cold air. "I guess we really need to talk, don't we?"

Slipping her pale hand out from her mitten, she reached for his cheek. But he saw her coming and took a large step back. "I can't be inside your head right now," he said, looking down at the wet ground beneath their feet. "I can barely stand my own thoughts." Glancing up at her, he added a strangled, "And feelings."

Nessie took a careful step towards him. "If they're anything close to mine, you should know how right they feel."

"Nothing about this is right." Jacob pushed his hands through his black hair. "Because it doesn't feel wrong, Nessie. And it should. It really, really should."

Another few steps put her right up against him, close enough that he could smell her. For someone who lived in a house of stinking vampires, she somehow managed to smell like sunshine and apples and sweet grass. He tried not to inhale, but he couldn't help himself. He would need the memory of her scent while he was in La Push.

"I'm not a little girl anymore," she reminded him. "And I know what I want."

Unable to fight temptation any longer, Jacob dipped his head at the same time she rose up on her toes. When their lips touched, he knew he was a dead man. If Edward, wherever he was, could see what was going through Jacob's mind, the ways in which he wanted to touch Nessie, there would be a vampire/wolf showdown...and Jacob was pretty sure he'd lose.

But she was warm, so much warmer than someone who was half-vampire ever should have been. She was slender and supple, but deceptively strong. When he grabbed her and hauled her up against his chest, her whimper was in pleasure rather than protest.

The slender fingers of her right hand twisted into his hair as their mouths met and melded over and over again. With her other hand, she tugged at the buttons of his shirt until she could reach inside and touch his skin.

When her palm covered the flesh over his rapidly-beating heart, Jacob broke the kiss. They stared at one another, panting for breath, each expelled whisper of air swirling around their faces.

He wasn't sure if she backed up against the nearby tree trunk or if he pushed her up against it, but within seconds his body covered hers against the sturdy sequoia and he kissed her again, harder this time, greedy for the sweet taste of her mouth.

"Jake," she moaned, snaking her arms around his neck.

All of a sudden, he froze. In slow motion, he drew back and saw her...eyes closed, lips parted and slightly swollen, cheeks flushed...and crippling guilt struck him. This was Renesmee...Nessie...daughter of the first woman he'd ever loved and the vampire who'd taken her life. Imprint be damned...it wasn't supposed to happen like this. Not yet. Not when he still had very clear memories of her birth.

With a snarl of self-disgust, Jake pushed away from the tree. "Go home, Nessie," he barked when he was a safe distance from her.

"Jake, I..."

"Now!"

He waited for the crunch of dead leaves and twigs beneath her feet that signaled her retreat, but he should have known her better. When he glanced over his shoulder, she was exactly where he'd left her. Her face was paler than he'd ever seen it before and her eyes were wet with unshed tears.

"I love you," Nessie whispered. "Why is that wrong?"

The owl hooted again, a lonely sound that echoed in the silent woods. "I have to go," Jacob eventually said. Without waiting for a reply, he phased, the sudden change in his body mass ripping his clothes to shreds. As fast as he could, he sprinted away from her scent.

But he could still taste her. She tasted like perfect sin.

* * *

To Be Continued


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: I really, really appreciate those of you who read the first chapter, and especially those of you who took the time to review. It really means a lot to me. I hope the fact that you're reading this means you enjoyed it enough to come back for more and I hope you feel the same way about this chapter!

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Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

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He ran without stopping, without even pausing, until he reached the edge of the Quileute reservation. The telepathic link that bound him to his fellow wolves might have been weakened when the pack split into two groups, but they'd already heard him coming. Sam was waiting for him by the river, not as a wolf, but in his human form.

"Welcome home, Jacob."

Changing back left Jacob naked; Sam handed him a pair of jeans and a shirt he'd brought with him and waited as he pulled them on. "I'm not back for good," he informed Sam. "I just couldn't be there anymore."

"The vamp smell finally got to you?" Sam chuckled. His smile faltered when he noticed Jacob's pained expression. "Come on. Emily's making pot roast for dinner."

An hour later, Jacob found himself surrounded by his friends, his family, in the warm kitchen of Emily and Sam's tiny house. Everyone was talking and laughing and eating, celebrating his unexpected return. Although the food was delicious-and comforting in a way that even Esme's best cooking never could be-Jacob's appetite had all but left him. As he pushed his fork absentmindedly through his generous serving of meat and potatoes, he looked around the table at the familiar faces.

Seated next to Emily, Sam was trying to get their five year old daughter, Brianna, to finish the peas on her plate. Their seven month old son, Sam Jr., was fast asleep on his mother's shoulder. Across the table, Paul had his free arm around Jacob's sister and Rachel looked perfectly happy about it as she lovingly stroked her hugely rounded belly. Quil and Embry were arguing over baseball statistics; Jacob could have joined in as he'd learned far too much about the sport from living with the Cullens, but he held his tongue. Seth was shoveling food into his mouth like he was storing up for winter and Jared was trying to keep up with him, despite his wife, Kim, teasing that if he kept eating like that, he'd be bigger than she was going to be in a few months.

So much life under one roof. Such a change from downing solitary meals in an empty dining room, only occasionally being joined by Nessie when she had a rare craving for human food. Nessie. What was she doing right then? Homework with Edward? Hunting with Jasper? Trying on clothes with Alice? Arm-wrestling with Emmett? Was she happy? Was she missing him? Was she even thinking about him at all?

It was Seth who noticed the change in his expression. The younger man lowered his fork as he quietly asked, "You okay, Jake?"

"I'm fine," he replied tersely. To prove this, he forked up a massive bite. This seemed to placate Seth, who truly believed that there was no problem that couldn't be solved by a good meal. He returned to his dinner, leaving Jacob to chew his way through a hunk of tender meat like it was a block of clay.

As the plates were being cleared away to make room for a chocolate sheet cake, Jacob made a silent escape onto the back porch of the house. The night was cold, but clear; a million brilliant stars dotted the blue-black sky. Was Nessie looking at the same stars in Oregon?

Shaking his head, Jacob gripped the hand-carved railing, careful not to splinter the wood. What was he doing? He'd come back home to put a safe distance between himself and these feelings and yet all he could do was think about her. He had to get her out of his mind. He couldn't take it anymore!

"Jake." Quil's voice didn't exactly startle him, but it shook Jacob out of his self-deprecation. His cousin walked up beside him and leaned against the railing. "Fifty bucks for your thoughts," he offered.

Jacob let out a snort. "You overcharge. And you suck. There's a couple of thoughts."

Quil's grin stretched from ear to ear. "Missed you, man."

"Yeah." Despite himself, Jacob nodded. "You, too."

They were quiet for a few minutes with nothing but the sound of laughter and metal forks scraping against china plates from inside the house coloring the silence. Finally, Quil glanced at Jacob. "Did something happen to the leeches?"

"Would you care if it had?" Jacob asked.

"Hey...not fair. Who fought with them when they needed us?"

"Sorry," Jacob muttered. "I get..."

When he couldn't come up with the right word, Quil supplied it for him. "Protective?" He laughed good-naturedly. "No worries. It's an imprint thing." The way Jacob's knuckles turned white as he gripped the railing even harder was all the evidence Quil needed to know he'd stumbled on a tender subject. "That's it, isn't it? Why you came back?" Quil blinked as he realized, "Whoa! Did you and Nessie...you know?"

Jacob did know, even without the crude hand gesture Quil made to illustrate his inquiry. Growling, he pushed away from the railing and started down the short steps to the open field.

"Hey!" Quil called out, following him. "It's not a crazy question. She's pretty much grown-up by now, right? Or at least as much as she's gonna grow up. Jake!" He broke into a trot when Jacob's angry stride became too long for him to keep up with. "C'mon! Who else are you gonna talk to about this?"

Because he was right, Jacob came to a sudden stop, allowing Quil to catch up to him. "She has grown up." Jacob's words were nearly lost on the cold wind that swept over them. "And she's beautiful."

"Well, duh. She's half lee.." He stopped himself in time. "...vampire."

"It's more than that," Jacob argued. "It doesn't matter what she looks like because it's not her face that I'm..." Jacob cursed at the stars; Quil waited for him to go on. "We're ready for each other," he continued a moment later. "But it's not right, Quil. She's younger than Claire."

At the mention of his own imprint, Quil scatched his head helplessly. "I'm sorry, man. I really am."

"But you don't understand," Jacob snarled. "You can't undertand."

"Okay, that's true. I don't really have this kind of problem yet. My biggest worry is getting enough pink balloons for Claire's birthday party." He grinned proudly, almost like a brother talking about his younger sister. "She's turning ten soon, you know."

"We had a tenth birthday party for Nessie. When she was four."

Quil folded his arms. "Gotta hand it to the blood-suckers. They do keep up appearances well." When Jacob just scowled, he continued, "A lesser man might be jealous of you, Jake, for not having to wait very long for your…um…mate. But I'm not. I have plenty of time before I have to worry about making that jump. Right now, all I have to be is Claire's protector and that's enough for me."

"It used to be enough for me, too. But now I look at Nessie and all I can think about is…" He growled in the back of his throat as if he could fight off the images of his body and Nessie's body entwined and writhing in passion. "It's wrong! She's only seven years old!"

"Yeah," Quil snorted. "In the same way her dad's only seventeen." He waved his hand dismissively. "It's all this supernatural crap. Our lives are unbelievable…so why are you having so much trouble with it?"

Jacob's jaw clenched. "I want her like I never wanted Bella."

"I'm sure they'd both be glad to hear that."

"I thought I'd never want someone as much as I wanted Bella."

"Bella was out of your reach, dude." Quil shrugged apologetically. "Deep down, I think you always knew that."

Jacob kicked a rock, sending it flying across the field. "I loved her and she loved me," he argued. A second later, he quietly added, "Just not enough." He frowned suddenly. "Do you think I only want Nessie because I couldn't have her mother?"

"No, I'm not on that team, Jake."

His frown deepened. "There's teams?"

Quil sighed reluctantly. "Not naming names, but some of the pack thinks that could be true. That she's kind of your...Bella version 2.0. I mean, have you even figured out if she can have...you know...kids?"

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"Well...isn't that the whole point of imprinting? Making sure the wolf gene gets passed on?"

Although Bella had made the same suggestion, hearing it from one of his own kind made Jacob's blood boil. "So, that's it then? I'm destined to screw her, so why not just do it? See if I can knock her up with a vampire puppy?"

"Hey." Quil held up his hands in surrender. "I never said that."

"You didn't have to." Jacob backed up towards the edge of the woods. "Tell Emily I said thanks for dinner."

"Jake, c'mon! You don't have to go. I'm sorry, okay? Just don't leave again," he implored, his dark eyes troubled. "We'll get you through this!"

But Jacob was already tearing through the forest. He wasn't sure where he was going, but the more distance he put between himself and the place he'd once called home, the better.

* * *

"What are you reading?"

Nessie didn't look up from her book to acknowledge the question her uncle asked as he sat down on the edge of her bed. "_David Copperfield_. For Lit class."

"Mr. Cobb does like that novel," Jasper noted with amusement. "Even if it is as old as I am. Of course..." Before she could stop him, he reached for the book and removed the true focus of her unswerving attention, the photograph that was tucked between the pages. "It helps to read it without any distractions."

She made a grab for the picture of Jacob, but he held it out of her reach. "Uncle Jazz." She bit her lip, a perfect imitation of her mother. "Please."

"You miss him this much already?" he asked.

"Wouldn't you miss Aunt Alice if she left you?"

A second later, Jasper handed the picture back to his niece. "I realize that I might very well be the last person you'd ever talk to about...things," he began. "But..."

Nessie cut him off. "Actually, you might be the one person I would." She reverently tucked the photo back into her book. "My dad...he only knows what I'm thinking...and everyone else can only see what I'm projecting. But you..." She smiled. "You're the only one who can sense what I'm actually feeling."

"I don't think anyone disputes your feelings, darlin'. We're just worried about you having them when you're still so young."

"And having them for a werewolf doesn't help, right?" The guilty flash in her uncle's butterscotch eyes made her sigh. "None of you should worry. Nothing's happened between us. Or will happen between us," she added bitterly.

"I think this is getting out of my area of expertise," Jasper confessed as he stood up. "Besides, I was only sent up here to bring you down for the meeting."

Hugging her book to her chest, Nessie flung herself into the pile of pillows on her bed. "I'd rather read."

"It's a family meeting," he reminded her. "And you're part of the family."

"So is Jake and he's not coming."

Jasper looked down at Edward and Bella's daughter with a mixture of amusement and exasperation. "Alice really wants you there. It's very important to her." When Nessie said nothing, he tried again. "Are you familiar with the expression, 'if mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy'?"

Nessie fought to supress a smile. She always loved it when her uncle slipped into his southern accent; it could bring her out of the foulest of moods.

"Well," Jasper went on. "In this house, if Alice isn't happy, I'm not happy. And if I'm not happy…" He raised an eyebrow. "…I'll make sure nobody's happy."

She rolled over to look up at him. "That's emotional blackmail, Uncle Jazz. Literally."

He inclined his chin in acknowledgment. "I'm not to be trusted at all." Jasper offered his niece his hand. "Shall we?"

They were all waiting in the dining room, gathered around the rarely-used table that could have easily sat twenty people. Aunt Rosalie and Uncle Emmett, her grandparents, her parents, Aunt Alice, Uncle Jasper. Her family...she loved each one of them more than she could say, but at that moment, she would have liked to have been anywhere else in the world.

With Jacob.

* * *

To Be Continued


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: I really appreciate the feedback I've gotten on this story. Just to warn you, there are some potentially disturbing things happening in this chapter, so proceed with caution. And please remember, I love Jacob and I want him to be happy, but I also want him to be real, flaws and all. Thank you so much for reading and I hope you come back for more!

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Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

"Should we ask Jacob to come back?"

Edward's question cut through the sweet silence that had followed their lovemaking. Without lifting her head from his chest, Bella tilted her chin back until she could see the frown on his beautiful face. "Are you serious?" she asked.

"I won't say it's the most ideal solution, but at this point I'm willing to try anything," Edward grudgingly admitted. "Nessie seems so lost without him."

"She'll be all right," Bella promised.

Her reassurance did nothing to dissipate his frown. "How can you be sure?"

"Because...she's stronger than I was when I survived a similar separation."

Edward's muscles tensed beneath her cheek; she pressed her lips against his skin to relax him. "Bella," he murmured. A pause followed. "When does that bad mark get stricken from my record?"

Laughing, she raised herself up on one arm to look down at him. "Not for at least a couple of decades."

"Hmm. Well..." He reached up, pushing his hands through the dark locks of her hair. "If Jacob is experiencing even a fraction of the pain I felt during that time, then he'll find his own way back. He won't be able to stay away for long."

"You did," Bella pointed out.

Edward lifted his head from the pillow to give her a hard, hot kiss that left her aching for more. "Seriously? Decades?" he asked with a smirk as his fingers trailed down the pale length of her throat.

She nodded, her eyelashes still fluttering. "At least."

His delicate, maddening touch continued down her body until she was on the brink of exploding from anticipation. "Can I get time off for good behavior?" he asked, his lips at her ear.

"We'll see." With reflexes and speed that rivaled his, Bella trapped his hand between her thighs. "You'll have to be really, really good."

Edward's smile was angelic. "Aren't I always?"

* * *

Even after so many years, Jacob had never forgotten the exact spot where he'd watched Bella jump off the edge of the cliff, almost to her death. That one stupid act had kick-started everything, the return of the Cullens, Bella and Edward's reunion, their marriage...all leading up to Nessie's birth. Maybe if she hadn't jumped, none of it would have happened. Maybe, if Edward had stayed away, it would have been Bella that Jacob imprinted on. She would have remained human, married him...and Nessie never would have been born.

Sitting on the edge of the cliff with a case of the cheapest beer he'd been able to find, Jacob wrestled with that final conclusion. Admittedly, at one time the thought of being with Bella had been incredibly appealing, no matter what the outcome. But now, when he pictured his life without Nessie, he found himself shivering despite the alcohol and his own enhanced body temperature.

He didn't want to live in a world where Nessie never existed. It would be a much colder place, for sure.

Jacob had just finished his fourth beer and was about to start on his fifth when he heard the sound of a woman's voice behind him.

"Didn't anyone ever tell you that you shouldn't drink alone?"

It said something about how deeply entrenched he'd been in his thoughts that he hadn't heard Leah Clearwater approaching. He relaxed and took a defiant swig from his bottle. "Apparently not." He gestured to the case. "Want one?"

She accepted his offer and lowered herself down to the ground next to him. As he handed her a bottle, her nose crinkled. "You smell like a vampire."

Jacob snorted. "It's good to see you again, too, Leah."

They drank for a few minutes with nothing but the sound of the wind through the trees and the crash of the waves on the rocks far below. "So." Leah flipped her shoulder-length hair to one side and he caught a whiff of the clean scent of her shampoo. "What happened?"

"Don't know what you mean."

"Come on. Something had to have happened to drive you away from the leeches. Let me guess..." She pretended to think. "You and the blonde princess finally had it out, once and for all."

Jacob drained his bottle with one gulp. "Had nothing to do with Rosalie," he muttered.

Leah thought again. "Bella caught you and Edward making out?"

Sudden, uncontrollable laughter bubbled up in Jacob's chest. "What the hell, Leah?" he managed to ask, shaking his head, a broad grin on his face.

"Hey, it got a smile out of you." She watched him flick the cap off a fresh bottle as he kept chuckling at the absurdity of her speculation. "How long has it been since you really laughed?"

His smile faltered. "What is this? An intervention?"

"Hell no." Leah quickly sipped her beer. "Personally, I couldn't care less why you left the bloodsuckers." She paused. "I'm just glad you did."

Jacob was just buzzed enough to nudge her side playfully. "Aww, you've missed me."

"Why is that weird?" she scowled. "You're my Alpha, Jake."

"Haven't been that for awhile. Besides...Sam says you barely phase anymore."

"They don't need me." Leah drew her knees up to her chest. "They never really needed me."

"I needed you." The alcohol coursing through Jacob's system propelled him to add, "And you never let me down, Leah."

She watched him out of the corner of her eye. "Even at my bitchiest?"

He waved his hand dismissively. "You had a lot of stuff to deal with back then. I got that. I had my own stuff."

"Bella," Leah said with a touch of disdain.

"Nessie," Jacob murmured, suddenly lost in the memory of the days surrounding her birth. He shook his head with enough force to make her blink. "Gotta get her out of my head."

He could still feel her watching him. "But...she's your soul mate. Right?"

Jacob's Adam's apple bobbed as he downed his beer. "Not right," he slurred. "Too young." His eyes were glassy. "Too god-damn young..."

"Jake, did you eat anything before this beer fest?" When he shrugged, Leah sighed and set her bottle aside. "Okay, I'm cutting you off. Beta's orders."

She made a grab for the cardboard case, but Jacob seized her wrists to stop her. Dangerously close to the edge of the cliff, they wrestled until Jacob, despite his half-drunken state, had her pinned beneath him.

"Guess I am still your Alpha," he gloated.

Leah narrowed her dark eyes, still struggling to free herself from his grip. After a few wasted minutes, she gave up and lay still beneath him. Their chests rose and fell with expended effort; their heated breath mingled in the air between their faces.

Jacob wasn't sure if she kissed him or he kissed her, but the end result was the same. Their mouths ground together, hot and wet and hard enough to leave bruises. For a split second, he got what he thought he'd wanted.

All thoughts of Nessie disappeared.

* * *

It was generally acknowledged in the Cullen house that while Bella loved her daughter more than words could express, motherhood had not turned her into a girly girl. So when Nessie needed new clothes in her rapid progression from little girl to young woman, it was Alice who gladly took her shopping.

When she wanted to play with makeup or have her hair braided, Rosalie was more than happy to indulge her every whim. Eventually the makeup sessions stopped, but Nessie still considered her Aunt Rose the only person in the house who knew exactly how she liked to have her hair brushed.

With every year that passed, Rosalie was afraid her niece would let their little ritual die, but Nessie never did. At least once every few days, she would poke her head into Rosalie and Emmett's room, a hair brush hidden behind her back. But a week after Jacob's departure, it was Rosalie who came knocking on Nessie's door.

"I don't really want to talk," Nessie told her.

"Good, because all I'm here to do is fix your hair." Rosalie swept into the room and immediately plucked a tangled lock off her niece's shoulder with disdain. "My god, child...when was the last time you took a comb to it?"

As promised, ten minutes passed in silence as Rosalie, sitting behind the girl on her bed, ran a brush through Nessie's long, bronze curls. With each comforting stroke, Nessie's defenses faltered until she suddenly found herself talking.

"Aunt Rose?"

"Hmm?"

Nessie hesitated. "How old were you the first time you..." She cleared her throat. "You know?" It took her a moment to realize that her aunt had frozen in place. "Aunt Rose?"

Rosalie slowly finished the stroke before setting the brush aside. Worried, Nessie turned to look at her. There was a dangerous look she'd never seen in her aunt's golden eyes; a shiver ran down her spine. "I'm sorry," she apologized, dragging her lower lip between her teeth. "It's none of my business."

"No, it's all right." Blinking out of her memories, Rosalie cupped her niece's cheek as if to reassure her that she'd done nothing wrong. "Why do you ask?"

"I don't know," Nessie lied. When Rosalie arched a perfect eyebrow, she sighed. "Okay, I do know. It's just..." She blushed. "It's something I've been thinking about lately."

"For any particular reason?"

Nessie said nothing, but it was all the answer Rosalie needed. For the girl's sake, she valiantly fought back every negative comment that instantly sprang to mind. It was no secret that she would never consider Jacob good enough for Bella and Edward's daughter. In fact, the very idea of him thinking that someday he'd have the right to put his paws on her only niece just because of some stupid wolf tradition made Rosalie want to scream. But for some strange reason, Nessie had decided to love the dog and Rosalie would do anything to protect Nessie, even going so far as to curb her tongue where Jacob was concerned.

But that didn't mean she had to encourage any hanky-panky.

"You know," Rosalie turned her niece back around and resumed her brush strokes. "Nothing is written in stone, Nessie. You're still very young and there's no reason to rush into...anything. I mean, who's to say how you'll feel in another ten years? Or even five years?" She fought to keep from snarling. "Just because certain people believe they're tied to you in a certain way doesn't mean you have to tie yourself to them. You can always..."

"Aunt Rose?" Nessie gently interrupted. "Please don't."

With a labored sigh, Rosalie ran her hand down the silky length of her niece's hair. "All right," she gave in. "I'll stop."

They were silent for another few seconds. "Was Uncle Emmett your first?" Nessie suddenly blurted out.

Rosalie's reply was quietly distant. "The first that counted."

"What do you mean?"

Nessie blinked when her aunt suddenly wrapped her arms around her from behind. "Little one," Rosalie murmured, resting her chin on Nessie's shoulder. "Not so little anymore, are you?" She hugged her niece tightly. "I just want you to remember one thing." Leaning back into the safe solidity of her aunt's embrace, Nessie waited for her to go on. "When it's with someone you love, it's more beautiful than you can imagine."

"Yeah?"

Rosalie kissed Nessie's temple. "Trust me." Pulling back, she gave the girl's head a final, loving stroke with her hand. "Just promise me that you won't rush into anything. Remember, you have a very long life ahead of you."

Nessie nodded solemnly. "I already know who I want to spend it with."

Sighing, Rosalie shook her head. "Your hair came from your father, but the stubborn streak...that's your mother's genes at work."

"I love him, Aunt Rose." She lifted her chin, displaying the same determination Rosalie not-so-fondly remembered from the early days of Bella's relationship with Edward. "He's been waiting for me...and now I'll wait for him."

"You know that if he ever hurts you, I'll put him to sleep," Rosalie sweetly informed her.

Nessie smiled softly. "I'm not worried. He never would."

* * *

It was so wrong. So why did it feel so good?

Jacob's head was spinning, the result of too much beer and not enough food or rest. It didn't help that Leah was wearing some scented lotion that was nothing short of intoxicating. Vanilla. He tore his mouth away from hers to taste her neck. Sugar.

"Jake," she moaned, her long fingers twisting into his hair. "More..."

Everything was new, the things he was doing and the things he was feeling. At first, he didn't want to stop. And then...he couldn't. She yanked his shirt over his head; he ripped her blouse apart. Her nails dug into his upper shoulders; his hand found the heat at the center of her body.

Jacob could feel his blood racing through his body, urging him on, but it was the alcohol that fogged his senses and made it possible for him to forget everything and everyone else. His world narrowed down to the woman beneath him and the mounting desire to have her right then, right there, as hard and fast as possible.

He only vaguely heard Leah tell him that it was okay, that no child would result from this given her unique biology. He wasn't sure he would have stopped even if it had been a possibility. It was too late. He was already plunging into her, consequences be damned.

It was only afterwards, as they lay side-by-side under the stars, the cold wind barely chilling their burning skin that Jacob's head cleared. As he sobered up, a weight began to gather on his chest, threatening to crush him. Guilt. Regret. Pressure so painful that he could barely breathe.

Leah turned into him, seeking the heat of his body as she dozed off with a sated smile. He swallowed back a surge of bile as she murmured his name. When he closed his eyes, he could see Nessie standing where he'd left her in the woods.

_I love you...why is that wrong? _

Jacob dragged his hands down his face as if he could erase the whole night. But it wasn't possible. What he had done could never be undone. The last truly pure and innocent part of him was gone forever.

It didn't matter now if Nessie was too young or if her family objected or if she couldn't bear his children. Everything had changed because from then on, no matter what happened, Jacob was quite certain that one simple fact would keep them apart.

He would never be good enough for her again.

* * *

To Be Continued


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: Thank you so, so, so much for all of the wonderful feedback on this story. I was glad to see that people enjoyed it, even after what happened. I hope you keep enjoying it!

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

_He smelled her. Sweet grass and apples. Lying on the edge of the cliff, his body warm from the sun's rays, Jacob turned his head, seeking out the source of the scent he loved so much. _

_Nessie emerged from the woods, her long white cotton dress floating around her legs. Her hair was down in glorious bronze curls that shone in same light that made her beautiful face glow. Her pink lips turned up in a smile meant only for him._

_He sat up as she approached on silent feet. "Nessie, I..."_

_"Shh." She kneeled down on the ground. He started to reach for her, wanting, no...needing to lose his fingers in the long locks of her hair, to memorize the taste of her mouth and the curves of her body, but she stopped him by putting her slender hand against his heart. "Jacob," she began. Her voice was like music to his ears. "My Jacob." _

_"Your Jacob," he promised. He covered her hand with his much larger one against his chest. "Only yours." _

_Her bottomless brown eyes were troubled. "Only mine?" she repeated. _

_Jacob swallowed. Her fingers had grown cold beneath his. He grasped them to warm them up, but it was like grabbing ice. "Nessie...yes. I love you." _

_The smile on her face fell. "I loved you, too." _

_"Nessie..." His stomach twisted. "Nessie, please..." Jacob stopped. Her fingers, only ice-like before, now felt smooth and slick and too cold to touch. Together, their eyes lowered to the place where they touched. Jacob moved his hand away, revealing a perfectly rendered ice sculpture of Nessie's hand. _

_"No." His eyes traveled the length of her ice arm, up to her delicately carved, crystal-clear face, forever frozen in an expression of deep hurt and painful betrayal. "No!" _

_When he reached for her, as if he could turn her back into warm flesh, the preternatural heat of his skin melted her cheeks. Horrified, he watched as she dissolved in a puddle of cold water before his eyes. _

Jacob jerked awake, her name on his lips. "Nessie!"

It was almost dawn. Over the thick line of trees to the east, he could see oranges and pinks beginning to color the night sky. He'd spent the night on the cliff...but he hadn't spent it alone.

He felt her stirring beside him before he even gathered up the courage to look at her. Leah stretched, more like a cat than a wolf, before she pressed her lips against the first part of him she reached, his tattooed bicep. "Morning," she purred. "How's your head?"

It ached, but not nearly as badly as his heart did. "What the hell did we do, Leah?"

She smirked and trailed her palm down his muscled abdomen. "What didn't we do, Jake?" Jacob grabbed her wrist before she reached her goal. Leah blinked. "You really don't remember?"

"I wish I couldn't." His clothes were in a heap a few feet away; he rolled away from her to retreive them. She watched him pull on his jeans; he ignored her wounded stare boring into his bare back. When he finally turned to her, she had wrapped her arms around herself, hugging her shaking shoulders. Guilt stabbed him in the gut. "Leah...I'm sorry."

"For what?" she whispered.

Spotting her blouse near his feet, Jacob offered her the ripped garment. "This was a mistake."

"Right." Leah yanked the torn blouse from his hand. "And I guess this is the part where you beg me not to tell anyone, especially a certain half-breed leech freak, that you mistakingly screwed my brains out and, let me remind you, had a great time doing it?"

"I know you're angry and you have every right to be," Jacob began darkly, "but don't ever call her that again. Consider it an order."

Leah glared at him. "I'm not exactly inclined to follow your orders anymore."

His tone softened. "I never wanted to hurt you, Leah."

"Yeah." She blinked back tears as she slipped her arms into the sleeves of her ruined shirt. "Tell me something I haven't heard before." When he took a few steps towards the forest, she scrambled to her feet. "Where are you going?"

He didn't turn around, but he stopped to answer her. "I have to tell her what I've done."

"Are you kidding?" Leah covered the distance between them and seized his arm as if she could anchor him in place. "I don't care how civilized the bloodsuckers are, Jake...if they find out, they'll kill you. And I don't think they'll even be sorry they did."

"She deserves to know," he replied, his voice dull. "It doesn't really matter what they do. She's the only one who can hurt me."

"Jake." Wetting her dry lips, Leah thought quickly. "Stay here. Stay with me. I mean...I know I'm not her and we'll never be able to have kids, but...but we could have a life, Jake. A good one. Maybe even a happy one. Definitely a normal one." She touched her forehead to his shoulder. "Please? Is it so terrible to imagine being with me?"

The worst part was that it wasn't. Closing his eyes, he could easily see them living in a tiny cabin tucked into the woods, only walking distance from his father's house and Sam's house. They'd spend their lives surrounded by their tribe, never having to move, never having to pretend to be something they weren't. Together they'd protect the reservation until the wolf fever settled and they aged and died, joining their ancestors in the great beyond.

And yet, he would always know that somewhere out in the world, Nessie was still waiting for him.

Jacob extracted his arm from her grip. "One day, when you find your own soul mate, you'll be glad you didn't settle for me." Tears spilled down her cheeks as he kissed the top of her head. "Goodbye."

He was running again, but this time, he wasn't running away.

* * *

_"'It is no worse because I write of it. It would be no better if I stopped my most unwilling hand. It is done. Nothing can undo it; nothing can make it otherwise than as it was.'" _

Mr. Cobb lowered his well-worn copy of _David Copperfield _and scanned the sea of blank, teenage faces before him until he found the one member of his ninth grade literature class who was actually paying attention. "Miss Cullen, can you tell me what Dickens means when he..."

The loud ring of the final bell tolled, cutting off the man's question. He sighed as his students grabbed their books and leaped from their seats, free for the length of their winter vacation. "I expect each and every one of you to not only finish this book over the holidays, but come to class next year prepared to discuss it _ad nauseum_." Mr. Cobb waved his hand to dismiss them, although it was a moot gesture at that point. "Happy holidays, everyone."

Nessie took her time closing up her book and placing it in the Prada shoulder bag that had been a birthday gift from her grandparents. When she was the last student in the room, she approached the teacher's desk. "I think Dickens means that what's in the past can't be changed, so it shouldn't linger in the present and definitely shouldn't affect the future."

Happily surprised, Mr. Cobb nodded. "And do you agree with him, Miss Cullen?"

She adjusted the strap of her bag as she thought this over. "I've always been taught that if you don't learn from the past, you're doomed to repeat it."

"I doubt even Dickens would argue with that."

There was a knock on the frame of the open classroom door just then; Nessie turned her head to see her parents out in the hall, carrying their junior-level schoolbooks.

"Your siblings seem to be more anxious to start their holidays than you," Mr. Cobb noted.

She smiled apologetically. "I guess we'll have to finish this next year."

"I look forward to that."

"Merry Christmas, Mr. Cobb."

He'd already returned his attention to his grade book, but at least now he was smiling. "Same to you, Miss Cullen."

Hand in hand, Bella and Edward waited for their daughter to emerge from her class. When she finally did, Edward slung his free arm over Nessie's shoulder in a gesture that could have been easily mistaken for brotherly, rather than paternal. "Staying after class to talk about Dickens," he said as they started down the mostly-empty hallway. "I've never been prouder."

"You do realize I'm living in your shadows," Nessie said with great accusation. "Every teacher at this school expects me to be a genius because my_ brother _and _sister _already aced their classes."

"I'm sorry, baby," Bella apologized, a twinkle in her golden eyes. "Next school we're at, your father and I promise to be especially stupid, so you don't have to work so hard."

Edward laughed when Nessie rolled her eyes. "Come on, ladies. Everyone's waiting for us."

Nessie elected to drive back to the house with Alice and Jasper. The trip flew by as her aunt chattered on about the Christmas party she was throwing that night for the staff of Carlisle's hospital. Nessie had forgotten all about it, even though she'd cast her vote in favor of it at the family meeting, more to make her aunt (and uncle) happy than because she was in a particularly festive mood. Frankly, there wasn't much to celebrate this year as far as Nessie was concerned. Jacob was gone and the days had never seemed colder or longer.

"Nessie, your party dress is already hanging in your closet." Turning away from the window, Nessie focused on her aunt who had twisted around in the passenger's seat to see her. Alice smiled, encouraging her niece to do the same. "You're going to love it," she promised.

She made the corners of her lips turn up, but the smile never reached Nessie's eyes. "Of course I will."

Jasper watched his niece through the rearview mirror as he pulled the car up next to Edward's on the wide stone driveway in front of the house. Nessie climbed out of the car with the intention of disappearing into her room until she was ordered to join the party. But as she entered the house with her family only a few steps behind, her grandmother was standing by the staircase, blocking her path.

Edward stepped forward, addressing his mother before she'd even spoken a word. "When did this happen?" he demanded.

"An hour ago," Esme replied. She locked eyes with Bella, mother to mother. "He's upstairs."

Although all Nessie smelled was pine from the massive Christmas tree in the foyer and cinnamon from something Esme had bubbling in the kitchen, Bella inhaled deeply and then reached for her daughter's hand.

"Nessie," her mother said softly. "Jacob's back."

It was as if someone had turned on a light in her heart. Joy bubbled up at the center of her chest and she suddenly felt as if she'd never be cold again. "Jake!" Tearing away from her family, she rushed past her grandmother, taking the stairs two at a time until she reached the top. The door to Jacob's room was closed, as it had been since he'd left, but hers was wide open. "Jake!" she called out again as she ran into the room.

He was sitting on the edge of her bed, looking at a framed photo he'd taken from her dresser. She knew what picture it was without even looking; it had been taken on the day they'd celebrated her first chronological birthday, although she'd resembled a much older child at the time. She was sitting on Jacob's shoulders, holding a party hat in place on his head. He was grasping her ankles just above her tiny pink sandals to hold her steady, a wide, white smile on his face.

Jacob looked up, his dark brown eyes mournful. "Sometimes I wish we could go back to the way things were."

"I don't." Nessie let her bag slip off her shoulder. It landed on the polished wood floor. "I'm glad I've grown up." She crossed to the bed. Even though he was sitting, she was only a few inches taller than him. "Because I get to do this now."

At the touch of her lips against his, Jacob jerked his head away. "Don't, Nessie." When she tried to kiss him again, he stood up, putting as much distance between them as possible. "I can't be with you like that."

Her breath caught in her throat. "Why not?"

Jacob never got to answer. Just then, Edward appeared in the open door frame, his stone cold glare fixed on Jacob. "Renesmee." A worried chill ran down her spine. Her father rarely used her full name. "I need you to go back downstairs."

"Daddy, I kissed him," Nessie said with a frown. "You can't blame him for it."

"He's not upset about that," Jacob told her wearily. "Please go, Nessie."

She looked back and forth between the two most important men in her life. One was furious; the other, resigned to his fate. "What's going on?" she demanded. "Jake?"

Jacob carefully set the picture back into place on her dresser before he spoke again. "I didn't mean for it to happen, Edward. You should be able to see that."

"It doesn't matter what your intentions were," Edward snarled. Nessie had never heard her father speak like that; deep down, it frightened her. "Only your actions count."

"Well, you would know all about that," Jacob replied. "And so would Bella."

Nessie had no idea what they were talking about, but Jacob's comment made Edward lunge for him. With speed that gave away her parentage, Nessie threw herself against Jacob's side. "Stop!" she screamed. Edward froze, his hand raised in preparation for a powerful blow. "Please don't fight," she begged them. "Whatever's wrong...it can't be that bad."

Jacob's heart beat fast beneath her ear. "It is, Nessie," he whispered. She looked up at him. Moisture gathered in the corners of his eyes. "I'm sorry, but I have to tell you...I need to tell you..." Jacob's hands balled into tight fists. "I didn't wait for you."

* * *

To Be Continued


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: Sorry for the slight delay. Getting ready for vacation:) Thank you so much for your feedback so far; I really appreciate you taking the time to read and review. If I don't get to update again before Christmas, have a great holiday!

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

"I don't understand." Nessie took a step back from Jacob, but never tore her stare away from him. "What do you mean you didn't wait for me? Wait for me...for what?"

Jacob closed his eyes in self-loathing. "Please don't make me say it."

"Why not? Doesn't she deserve to know?"

He opened his eyes to glare at Edward. "I didn't come back to confess anything to you," he spat.

"But you must have known I'd see it in your thoughts. In her thoughts, once you told her."

Nessie shook her head. "See what? Jake, Daddy...please. What's happened?"

Ignoring Edward, Jacob looked Nessie straight in the eye. The moment of truth had arrived; as painful and horrible as it was going to be, he couldn't back down now.

"I was...with someone else while I was gone."

Seconds dragged by like hours, but Nessie didn't move, didn't even blink. Her heart had frozen in her chest and the only person who had ever been able to keep her warm was the cause of it. "Who?" she whispered. Before he could reply, she changed her mind. "No." Her eyes shimmered with hot tears. "It doesn't really matter...does it?"

Edward gently, protectively grasped his daughter's shoulders. "I think you should leave, Jacob.

"When she tells me to," Jacob snapped. "Not a second before."

Nessie touched her father's hand, unwittingly allowing him a glimpse into the turmoil of emotions in her mind. Although this made Edward growl in the back of his throat, she stopped him with a quiet, "Daddy, can I talk to Jake alone?"

"Nessie..."

She cut him off. "Please?"

Unable to deny his daughter anything, Edward gave in. "All right. Five minutes." He touched her cheek, threw Jacob a deadly glare and left the room.

Once he was gone, Jacob shook his head. "I never wanted this to happen, Nessie. I swear, if I could change it, I would. You have to believe that I..."

Nessie held up her hand, a silent command for him to stop. She walked to her abandoned school bag, reached inside for her copy of David Copperfield and flipped through the pages until she found a marked passage.

She began to read, _"'She was more than human to me. She was a Fairy, a Sylph, I don't know what she was - anything that no one ever saw and everything that everybody ever wanted. I was swallowed up in an abyss of love in an instant. There was no pausing on the brink; no looking down or looking back; I was gone, headlong_.'"

Nessie looked up at him for a long minute before asking, "Was that what it was like for you when I was born?"

He could only nod until he had swallowed the lump in his throat enough to utter a strangled, "Yes. Yes, exactly."

"Then how could you be with someone else?"

Her simple, quietly-posed question hung in the air between them. "I don't know," Jacob finally admitted. "I was drinking, but that's not an excuse."

"Why were you drinking?"

"So I wouldn't think about you." Nessie sucked in a sharp breath. Jacob cursed softly. "You have to understand, Nessie...seven years ago, I watched your birth. I was just about the first person to hold you. You rode on my back and bit me when I didn't go fast enough." He paused. "One day you were a child and the next...you weren't. I always knew that someday I'd look at you and I'd see a woman I wanted to love, not a child I wanted to protect. I just never, ever expected it to happen so fast."

Nessie slowly closed her book. "Do you think it was any easier for me?" When Jacob blinked, she continued, "You knew we'd be something more someday. I didn't. I had to deal with that realization on my own, without anyone telling me what was happening." She took a step towards him. "But the difference is...it never felt wrong to me. You're my hero. My Jacob." She lifted her shoulders. "Of course I was going to love you."

His hands itched to reach for her. "Nessie, I'm so sorry."

"What am I supposed to do, Jake?" She shook her head. "I'm never going to stop loving you. And you're never going to see me as anything but a child."

"That's not true. God, that's not true."

"Really?" Without waiting for his reply, Nessie let her book fall to the floor as she grabbed the back of his head and pulled his mouth down to meet hers. Stunned, Jacob let her push him back towards her bed; his knees caught against the edge and he landed on his back on the mattress, unable to do anything but keep kissing her as she straddled his hips.

Her kiss was hard, but her lips were soft and her body fit against his like they were made for each other. Her scent, her taste, the feel of her hands all went to his head faster than the case of beer had. He didn't care what thoughts Edward was hearing downstairs; he never wanted this to end.

So when Nessie stopped moving all of a sudden and sat up, Jacob nearly groaned from the loss of sensation. "Nessie..."

She slid off of him and backed away from the bed as he raised himself up on his elbows. "You would never do this with a stranger," she said softly. "No matter how drunk you were. So it had to have been someone you know. Someone on the reservation." Her eyes darted back and forth, but focused on nothing as she put the pieces together. Their eyes met at the moment she realized, "It was Leah Clearwater, wasn't it?"

All he could say was, "It was a mistake."

A moment passed. "I think Daddy was right." Jacob sat up slowly "I think you should go," Nessie told him.

He stood and ran a hand down his face. He wanted to argue, to fight, to beg her for the right to stay with her forever. But he'd told Edward he would only go if she told him to. And now she had. "Okay." When he reached to touch her one last time, she turned her head away from him.

At the door, Jacob looked back. "Nessie...I'll never be so far that you won't be able to find me. If you ever want to, that is." He smiled sadly. "I know it doesn't mean much now, but I do love you. I've always loved you. And I always will."

With that, he left and Nessie crumpled to the ground.

* * *

Bella couldn't stop pacing. Back and forth in front of the Christmas tree she went, unable to sit still while her daughter was upstairs with Jacob. Her anxiety had already sent Jasper from the room and although she knew she was dancing on Rosalie's last nerve, she kept going, twisting her wedding and engagement rings around her finger the whole while.

When she heard Edward coming down the stairs, she bolted into the foyer. "What's going on?" she demanded. "Is Jake all right?"

"Bella, don't concern yourself with Jacob's well-being," Edward told his wife as he walked past her into the living room. "He doesn't deserve it."

"I've been saying that for years," Rosalie snorted as she stood up from the couch. Upon seeing the dark look on her brother's face, her eyes narrowed. "What did the dog do?"

"Don't call him that," Bella snapped. "He's part of the family."

Edward shook his head. "No. Not anymore. I don't want him living in this house."

"Well, that's not your decision to make," Bella replied, folding her arms, preparing for a fight. "It's Carlisle's house, technically, and until he says otherwise, Jacob is welcome to..."

"Carlisle won't fight me on this. And neither will you, once you know."

Bella stared at her husband as if he'd gone mad. "Know what?"

But Edward was suddenly concentrating too hard on something to answer him. As he listened to whatever thoughts only he could hear, the anger Bella had seen in his eyes morphed into rage she'd only witnessed once or twice before, usually when her life had been in mortal danger.

"I'll kill him," Edward hissed. "I will kill him!"

"Can I help?" Rosalie asked.

Bella ignored her and reached for her husband's hand before he could plunge it into his messy bronze locks. "Edward! What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Do you know what he's doing up there with her? What he's thinking about doing?" her husband shouted.

"Probably nothing that I didn't think about doing with you a thousand times before we were married," she retorted. "Why are you so bent out of shape about this all of a sudden?"

Edward took a breath he didn't really need and expelled it slowly, willing himself to calm down. "I never did to you what he's done to our daughter, Bella. I never would have. Never could have!"

Bella pleaded with him, "What has he done?"

Edward's reply was cut off by the unmistakable sound of Jacob's massive body thundering down the stairs. Without stopping to look at anyone or anything, he slammed his way out of the house and took off running towards the woods.

"Nessie." A mother's instinct propelled Bella to race up the stairs with Edward on her heels. Although she wasn't bidden, Rosalie followed. "Nessie?" Bella cried out.

They found her sobbing dry tears on the floor next to her bed. Without hesitating for even a second, Bella shot to her daughter's side and pulled the girl into her arms. "Baby," she murmured into her hair. Nessie buried her face against her mother's shoulder. "Everything's going to be okay, I promise."

"What happened?" Rosalie looked to Edward. "What did he do to her? Did he hurt her?"

"Not physically," Edward muttered. "He's still in one piece, isn't he?"

Bella glared at him from over the top of their daughter's head, but she didn't get a chance to say anything becuase at that moment, Alice ran into the room with Jasper close behind.

"Why am I seeing you locking Edward out of your room tonight?" Alice asked Bella. When she noticed Nessie crumpled in her mother's arms, the accusation in her voice vanished. "Nessie? What's happened?"

"We don't know," Rosalie told her sister between her teeth. "He hasn't seen fit to tell us yet."

Jasper put his hand to his head, as if it ached. His brow furred as it always did when he was fighting off too much negative emotion.

"Did she and Jacob have a fight?" Alice stamped her foot. "I hate this! I hate not being able to see anything about them!"

"Trust me," Edward muttered. "In some ways you're better off for it."

Rosalie folded her arms tightly. "I swear, if that dog did this to her, I will..."

"Enough!" Bella shouted. In the wake of silence that followed her outburst, Nessie's quiet sobs seemed amplified, filling the whole room with her anguish. Holding her daughter even tighter, Bella looked to Jasper. "Please...can you help her?"

A second passed before Jasper moved forward. Crouching down beside them, he laid his hand on his niece's shoulder. "Go to sleep, sweetheart," he murmured. "We won't let anything happen to you."

Under the influence of her uncle's power, Nessie's body slowly relaxed until she lay limp against her mother; her eyes closed and her expression became almost serene.

Bella let out a weary sigh of relief. "Thank you, Jasper."

With Edward's help, she moved Nessie to her bed, and pulled the covers up around her. "Everyone out," Bella ordered, her golden eyes narrow. "Not you," she said when Edward started to move towards the door. "Tell me what happened," Bella said when the rest of the family was gone. "Just the facts. Nothing else."

Edward sat on the edge of the bed, his eyes never leaving Nessie's face. "I waited for you for a hundred years, Bella," he began. "Jacob Black couldn't wait ten for our daughter..."

* * *

"We'll cancel the party, of course." Although the very idea of her careful planning going to waste had to be wounding Alice deeply, she nodded firmly, confirming her decision. "It'll be hard enough for the humans to be here. It'll only be worse with this cloud hanging over us."

"What cloud?" Rosalie snorted. "I'm glad he's gone. As far as I'm concerned, he can run back to his bitch and create litters and litters of puppies. Nessie's better off without him."

Carlisle shook his head at his daughter. "I think even you know that's not true, Rosalie. Jacob has been an ubiquitous presence in Nessie's life from the moment she was born. They share a destiny that in some ways we can't even begin to understand. I have no doubt that he's hurting just as much as she is right now, perhaps even more."

"Guilt will do that," Edward added tersely. "I agree with Rosalie a hundred percent."

Emmett nudged Jasper with his elbow. "Never thought I'd hear that in my lifetime," he snickered under his breath. Jasper nodded absentmindedly.

Bella had separated from the group gathered in Carlisle's study and was standing by the window, staring out at the woods. Alice approached her now on silent feet. "Bella? What do you think? Should we cancel it?"

"I don't know what to do," Bella admitted. It was clear from the defeated tone of her voice that she wasn't talking merely about the Christmas party. She turned around slowly. "What should I do?"

Alice reached for her sister's hand. "I can't tell you because you haven't decided yet."

"What is there to decide? He's one of my best friends...but she's my daughter. I want to find him and...I don't know...make him tell me what the hell he was thinking." Bella paused. "But she needs me more than he does right now."

"She does," Alice agreed. "So you're staying here."

Bella's eyes met Edward's. "I'm staying here."

"And the party?" Alice hinted.

"Don't cancel it," Bella decided with a reluctant sigh. "God knows we could use a little holiday cheer right now."

Subdued, even with this good news, Alice went off to tend to the last minute details. Jasper followed her, while Carlisle gently ushered Emmett and Rosalie out of the room, leaving Bella and Edward alone.

"You're making this a thousand times worse than it has to be, you know," Bella accused her husband. "I think you were more understanding when I was the one you and Jake were fighting over."

Edward slipped his hands into his pockets calmly. "And I think I never really understood how much Charlie hated me after I came back to Forks. Until now."

"But he eventually forgave you," she reminded him.

"Then he's a better man than I am." He took a step towards her. "Aren't you mad, Bella? I can't...you're keeping me out of your mind, but I need to know what you're thinking."

Bella stared at Edward for a long moment. "You won't like it." A moment passed. "I can't hate him, Edward. He made a mistake, yes, but he's human. Maybe you've forgotten what that's like, but I haven't. I can't judge him or condemn him...because I'd have to do the same to myself." She hesitated. "You don't know...I've never told you how close I came to betraying you with him."

"I know, Bella. I've always known."

"And you forgave me."

He shook his head. "There wasn't anything to forgive." Edward's tone grew darker. "But what Jacob did..."

"What he did was not be perfect. For one stupid flipping minute, he didn't live up to some great and high ideal. But Edward, if you're going to hold everyone accountable for their moments of imperfection, then you're pretty much going to end up only being able to be around Carlisle." Bella brushed past him on her way out the door. "I'll be upstairs with Nessie."

But Nessie, Bella quickly discovered, wasn't alone. Rosalie was sitting on the edge of her bed, holding the girl's pale hand. She looked up as Bella entered the room. "Oh, good. I was about to come looking for you."

"Is something wrong?" Bella asked.

"Not at all." Rosalie's beautiful face lit up with a smile. "Actually, I was just discussing something very exciting with Nessie."

Bella arched an eyebrow at her sister. "And what's that?"

Rosalie looked down at her niece. "Do you want to say or should I?"

It took Nessie a few seconds to gather the energy to sit up. Her voice, when she spoke, was as dull and lifeless as her eyes. "Aunt Rosalie wants to go to Europe for a couple of months."

"Extended vacation," Rosalie interrupted. "The usual places: London, Paris, Madrid, Rome." She and Nessie exchanged a silent look. "Emmett doesn't want to miss basketball season, so I was thinking..."

"I want to go with her," Nessie interrupted. When Bella opened her mouth to protest, Nessie bit her lip. "Please, Mom. Let me go with her."

Edward was never going to forgive her, but Bella let out a sigh and nodded.

Sometimes a girl needed to run away for a little while in order to find her way home.

* * *

To Be Continued


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: Merry Christmas, everyone! Thank you so much for taking the time out of your holidays to read my story. I really hope you enjoy it:)

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

Emily Uley had just finished feeding Sam Jr. when she heard a noise on the back porch. As her husband was busy putting Brianna to bed, she quickly buttoned up her blouse and settled her sleepy son into his carrier before donning a jacket and stepping outside to investigate.

"Hello?" The wind that rushed through the woods was bitterly cold. Emily folded her arms tightly over her chest as she scanned the dark porch. "Is anyone there?"

"Em...it's me." It was Jacob Black who stepped into the light from the window, but Emily barely recognized him. His massive shoulders were slumped; his pale, clammy skin was streaked with dirt and he wore nothing but a pair of heavily patched shorts. But it was his eyes that made her gasp ever so slightly. Although they were red-rimmed and blood-shot, they were almost completely lifeless. He moved as if he had only enough energy to keep standing and any other movement would have been far too exhausting.

"Jacob? What are you doing out here?"

He ran his tongue over his dry, cracked bottom lip, but his mouth was too dry to wet it. "Don't have anywhere else to go."

Like he was a younger brother, or even her own child, Emily reached up to lay a hand on his cheek. Her palm touched fire and fear instantly gripped her heart. She knew the heat of a werewolf's skin, but this was just wrong.

Jacob was sick.

"Oh my god," she whispered. "Honey...what happened to you?"

The next thing she knew, Jacob's legs had given out from beneath him and all she could do was shout for Sam as he collapsed to the ground.

* * *

"He'll be all right." The oldest and most trusted healer on the reservation nodded as if to confirm his statement. "He just needs a lot of rest, several good meals and..." Pausing, the weathered man lowered his voice. "He really shouldn't...change for awhile."

Sam shook his head. "Won't be a problem." He glanced at the sofa where Jacob lay sleeping through his fever with the help of an herbal tea. "I doubt he has the strength to phase, anyway."

"It's true that he is very ill." Looking back and forth between Sam and Emily, the healer continued, "But while his body will recover quickly, I am not so sure about his spirit." He paused. "It feels broken in half. That isn't something any medicine can cure."

After seeing the old man to his truck, Sam came back into the house to find Emily wringing out a cold washcloth before she laid it on Jacob's forehead. "What do you think happened to him?" Emily asked softly.

Sam lowered himself onto the arm of the couch and watched as his wife tended to his former Beta. "I didn't know whether to share this with you or not," he started.

Her expression was suddenly troubled. "Why wouldn't you share something with me?"

"Because I'm never sure how you feel about Leah and I being in each other's thoughts."

Emily let out a soft sigh. "Sam, I came to terms with that a long time ago. How could I possibly hold something that neither of you can control against you?" She lifted her slender shoulders. "Besides, she might be able to see into your mind, but I get to see into your heart. The better deal, as far as I'm concerned."

He cupped her scarred cheek in his palm and whispered his love in Quileute. After a long moment, Sam drew back. "Jacob and Leah...they were...they had..." He stopped, unsure of exactly what word to use.

Fortunately, with his mate, he didn't need words. Emily's dark eyes grew wide. "Oh god."

"Yeah," Sam agreed. "It was his first time."

"Not hers, of course." Emily looked down at Jacob; he was frowning in his sleep. "She should have known better."

"And him?" A shadow crossed Sam's face. "He has a soulmate. Even if she is a bit...different."

"You think the Cullens could have found out?" Emily thought quickly. "Edward can read minds. And couldn't one of them see the future?"

Sam rubbed the back of neck. "I think that if they know, it's because Jacob told them. He's always been so damn honest; the guilt was probably killing him." He snorted. "There are iron-clad rules about harming a fellow wolf's imprint, but do they still apply if the one who's done the damage is the wolf himself?"

"The person Jacob has damaged the most is himself," Emily reminded her husband. "Just look at him." Together, they watched Jacob for a few seconds. "Broken spirit," she whispered. "I imagine Renesemee's spirit is the same. I know mine would be if..."

"Hey." Sam took her slender hands between his massive ones. "That would never happen. Never. I couldn't hurt you like that."

"You think it never hurt to know that you and Leah were each other's first lovers?"

He kissed her knuckles. "I can't change that. I'm not even sure I want to because if I hadn't had some clue about what I was doing, your first time wouldn't have been nearly as good." Sam hesitated. "It was good, wasn't it?"

Her laugh was like music to his ears. "Unforgettable. In every way. Although..." Emily's eyes twinkled. "You could always refresh my memory..."

Before Sam could sweep her up and carry her off to the bedroom, Jacob's body jerked and his eyes flew open. "Nessie! Nessie, don't go!" Just as quickly as he'd gained consciousness, Jacob slipped back into the darkness. His muscles relaxed and his eyes shut, but it was too late. In the nursery, Sam Jr. began to cry, having been startled out of his sleep.

"Daddy!" Brianna's voice was frightened as she called for Sam.

With matching sighs and a silently exchanged look that promised they'd continue where they'd left off as soon as possible, the parents parted ways, each heading off to calm one of their children, leaving Jacob to his feverish nightmares.

* * *

"The last time I spent Christmas in London was 1980." Rosalie indicated the windows and the dark grey sky beyond them. "It was like this then, too. No snow, but a lot of very cold rain."

Although she didn't really feel like talking, Nessie asked, "Was Uncle Emmett with you then?" The question worked; her aunt began recounting their 1980 world tour and Nessie was free to sit back in her chair and pretend to sip from her delicate china cup.

The Georgian Restaurant in Harrod's department store was a Christmas wonderland of decorated trees, sparkling lights and holly boughs, but Nessie felt absolutely no holiday cheer. How could she? It seemed like everywhere she looked in the ornate dining room, she could see happy Londoners having high tea, their last-minute Christmas gifts resting by their feet, just waiting to be taken home and presented to the loved ones for whom they had been purchased. It was Christmas Eve, and although she had chosen to take this trip with her aunt, Nessie hadn't known how hard it would be to be away from the rest of her family for the holiday.

She missed baking cookies with her grandmother for the neighbors. She missed wrapping presents with Aunt Alice for the children's wing of the hospital. She missed hearing her grandfather read the Christmas story. She missed staying up late to watch "It's a Wonderful Life" with Uncle Emmett. She missed being tucked into bed by her parents and hearing them tell her how she was the best present they'd ever been given.

She missed waking Jacob up in the morning and pulling him half-asleep down the stairs to open presents and...

"Nessie?" She hadn't realized that her grip on the cup had grown so tight until she felt her aunt pry it out of her hand. "You're a million miles away," Rosalie said without accusation. "Or maybe just a couple of thousand?"

"I don't regret coming with you." Her reply was quick. Too quick. Her aunt arched one perfect eyebrow. Nessie relented, "Maybe we just should have waited until after the new year," she mumbled.

"Do you want to go home?" Rosalie asked. "It would be very easy. With the time difference, we might even make it back before Christmas morning."

The possibility of doing all of those things-cookies, presents, and movies, even if she was surrounded by her family and their love-held absolutely no appeal to her if Jacob wasn't there to share any of it. Nessie shook her head. "No. And I'm sorry, Aunt Rosalie. It was my idea to go before Christmas."

Rosalie studied her from over the rim of her own tea cup. "We all agreed it was for the best. Even your mother. But if you're having doubts..."

"I'm not," Nessie swore. "I'm not sorry I'm not there. It wouldn't be..." She drew in a breath and released it. "Wouldn't be the same."

"Well." Rosalie winked. "I say we pretend to finish our tea and then shop until they kick us out of the store. Yes?"

Nessie tried to smile, but it didn't quite reach her eyes. "Absolutely."

It was dark by the time they left, and the clouds that had been hanging over the city all day had parted just enough to reveal a patch of midnight blue sky and a smattering of stars. As Rosalie hailed a cab to take them back to the Lanesborough Hotel, Nessie found the brightest one, closed her eyes and made a wish.

But it didn't come true. In the morning, the only person who greeted her with a cheerful "Merry Christmas" was her aunt.

* * *

By the time Christmas morning dawned, Jacob was feeling well enough to sit up and watch Sam and Emily's daughter tear into her presents. He even smiled as Brianna hugged her brand new doll like she was never going to let go of it. But when he remembered a similar event with Nessie and a stuffed wolf, his smile quickly faded.

He'd never really celebrated Christmas until he started living with the Cullens. Nowadays, of course, the children who grew up on the reservation were much more likely to have Christmas trees and dreams of what Santa Claus would bring them, but as he'd been growing up, it had been considered a "pale-face" holiday and not one that his father was inclined to adopt, especially considering that they'd often had very little money.

But the Cullens loved the holidays and after seven years, their enthusiasm had infected him. Although all he'd been able to stomach for the past few days had been beef broth and Jello, Jacob suddenly had a craving for one of Esme's sugar cookies. More than that, though, he wanted to actually be there in that huge living room with that insanely expensive tree, watching Nessie's face light up with each festively-wrapped package she opened. And if he was really honest with himself, he also wanted to be there to corner her in the hallway where Emmett had gleefully lined the ceiling with mistletoe sprigs. He wanted nothing more than to feel her lips against his and hear the tiny noises of need she made in the back of her throat whenever they kissed.

Jacob could sense Sam's concern when he suddenly stood up from the touch on wobbly knees. "I'm fine," he assured him. "I can make it to the damn bathroom on my own."

The Uley family was so wrapped up in their Christmas morning that they didn't even notice Jacob borrowing Sam's phone. He took it out onto the porch, almost grateful for the intensely cold wind after several days cooped up inside. After a couple of failed attempts at courage, Jacob dialed a number from memory, put the phone to his ear and waited.

"Cullen residence." It was Jasper who answered the phone. Good. Jasper might have been the best fighter, but he also had one of the coolest heads in the group, after Carlisle, of course. "Hello?" Jasper said after a moment of silence.

"It's Jake," he blurted out. "Um...Merry Christmas."

There was a long pause. "Same to you, Jacob."

He blew out a breath. "I know I shouldn't be calling, but I just..." Jacob stopped. "I couldn't not call today, you know?"

Jasper paused again. "I understand."

"Can I...do you think I could...will she let me say..."

"She's not here," Jasper cut him off, not rudely, but not gently either. "But I will tell her that you called."

It was more than he should have expected, given the circumstances. Reluctantly, Jacob nodded. "Yeah. Thanks, man."

"If I might offer my opinion." Having thought for sure that Jasper had hung up, Jacob was surprised when a moment later the vampire continued, "Time and distance can do more than just heal wounds. They can also put things into perspective and allow us to see our lives and the people around us with fresh eyes."

"That's a really nice way of telling me not to call again," Jacob snorted. "Better than I probably deserve."

"If that's all you took away from that, then I'm sorry for not having the right words." Jasper's accent had thickened, a sure sign that he was irritated. "See you around, Jacob." He ended the calling, cutting Jacob off from his admittedly-tenuous tie to Nessie.

Back in the house, Emily was making pancakes for breakfast, but his appetite had disappeared again. He crawled back onto the couch, pulling the hand-woven blanket up around his chilled body. As Jacob lay there, watching the fireplace in the stone hearth, Brianna approached him with her doll securely tucked under her arm.

"Unca Jake?" she whispered. "Mommy says your heart got broken. Does it hurt?"

He closed his eyes, his Adam's apple bobbing. "Yeah. A lot."

Momentarily forgetting her mother's order to leave Jacob alone to rest, Brianna tugged at the blanket until she could see Jacob's T-shirt. With chocolate-lined lips, she smacked a kiss onto the center of his chest. "There!" She beamed. "All better now!"

What else could he do but muster the strength to wrap the giggling girl up in his arms and plant a kiss of his own onto her precious cheek? "Thank you, Brianna-bear." Jacob set her back onto her feet and she skipped off to play with her new toys.

Jacob turned his eyes up towards the ceiling as Jasper's words played over and over again in his mind until he was too tired to contemplate them any further. He drifted off into dreams of sugar cookies, mistletoe and Nessie's perfect lips.

* * *

To Be Continued


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: Most of this chapter has been sitting on my computer for over a year, just waiting to be finished. I really want to apologize for that to everyone who's been waiting to read it. I also want to thank Alethea whose incredibly flattering PM prompted me to get off my butt and get this chapter out. I can't say when the next one will come, but generally speaking, once the ball gets rolling, it rolls for awhile:) Enjoy and again, thank you so much for being so patient.

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

For Valentine's Day, Emmett and Alice flew to France to meet up with Rosalie and Nessie. While husband and wife were busy catching up in the hotel, Alice took her niece out for an evening stroll along the French Riviera. It was only inevitable that they would end up shopping; between Rosalie and Alice, Nessie was going to need to charter a private plane just to get her new wardrobe back to America.

As Nessie was trying on a sleeveless D&G dress, Alice caught her up on all the latest news from school-who was dating who, which cheerleader got pregnant over Christmas break, how many girls had asked her father to the prom so far-silly, trivial gossip that kept the conversation from straying into dangerous territory.

But eventually, the elephant had to be addressed.

"You're very missed," Alice told her niece as they rested on a bench near the hotel. The night air was cool, but neither of them felt it. "Especially by your parents."

"I miss them, too," Nessie confessed. "But if you're trying to tell me it's time to go home..."

"That's not what I'm doing, so just let me finish, all right?" Although Alice wasn't upset, it was the sharpest she'd ever heard her aunt speak; Nessie nodded obediently. "I can't begin to understand how much you've been hurt, Nessie, so I would never presume to tell you what you should or shouldn't do right now." Alice paused as she searched for the right words. "However, I do think there will come a time when you'll have to stop licking your wounds long enough to let them heal."

Nessie frowned. "You sound like Dad. He would drag me home right now if Mom would let him."

"Edward's not the only one who would." Her aunt shook her head. "If you're not with us, our family isn't complete."

"Please don't get me wrong. Part of me would really love to go home," Nessie whispered. "But I just...I don't think I can face...things. People." She swallowed heavily. "Him. Jake."

"Because of what he did?"

"Yes!" Angry now, Nessie clenched the underside of the bench hard enough to crack the wood. "How could he do it? Especially with her!" She jumped to her feet, unable to sit still any longer. "Aunt Alice, every time I think about him, all I can see is him...and her...like that. And I..." She stopped short, her voice cracking. "It wasn't supposed to be her. It was supposed to be me."

Alice was quiet for a few seconds. "Can I tell you something that no one else, not even your uncle, knows?" she eventually asked. Nessie nodded. "I feel the exact same way." Reaching into her memories, Alice continued, "Jasper will be the first to admit that he was no saint. As a human or a vampire. I don't think he even knows how many other women he was with before we met. All the time I was waiting for him, searching for him, I imagined what it would be like when were finally together. Perfectly passionate...a first for both of us." Alice smiled ruefully. "When I found out the truth, it was like someone had stabbed me in the heart. And even though I knew that I would be the only woman in his life from them on, I hated that other women had gotten to him first." She lifted her slender shoulders. "I still do."

"But Uncle Jazz didn't know you. He didn't know you were out there, looking for him." Nessie folded her arms tightly. "Jake's always known. Since the day I was born."

"I was there that day." Alice stood up. "I saw what passed through him when he looked at you. I didn't need to be able to see into your futures to know that they'd be entwined forever." She put her hand on her niece's arm. "He made a mistake, one he will probably regret for the rest of his life. Don't make a similar mistake by being unable to forgive him."

"I want to hate him." Nessie spoke so softly that her words were nearly lost on the cool wind that blew over them. "But I can't."

Alice smiled. "It's not in your nature, Nessie."

Nessie's long lashes touched her cheeks as she closed her eyes. "Why didn't he wait for me? I would have waited for him forever."

"Oh, sweetie." There was a surprising amount of warmth in Alice's embrace, but Nessie felt none of the solace she usually found in her aunt's arms. Resting her chin on the top of her niece's head, Alice rocked her gently. "I wish I could tell you that everything will be all right."

"I know." Nessie pulled away and tucked her wind-swept hair behind her ears. "Do you think it's okay to go back to the hotel? I kind of want to go to sleep."

Alice stood up and started gathering packages. "If they're not done catching up, you can stay in my room."

* * *

Seth and Quill showed up at Sam's on Valentine's Day with three tickets to a monster truck rally in Port Angeles and every intention of using physical force to get Jacob out of the house.

It was only through the miracle of Emily's cooking that Jacob hadn't lost more weight than just a few pounds. Still, when his friends saw him for the first time since New Year's Eve, they exchanged a quick look.

"Jake, dude..." Quill shook his head gravely. "Really? A beard?"

Seth poked a finger at the scruffy growth that covered Jacob's chin and cheeks. "Did your razor run away screaming?"

Jacob knocked Seth's hand away from his face. "What do you two want?"

Quill pulled the tickets out of the inside pocket of his jacket. "Monster trucks, tonight, Port Angeles. Fuck Valentine's Day."

"Don't even bother," Seth said when Jacob started to protest. "We will knock you out and stick you in the back of the truck if we have to."

"I can take you," Jacob scowled.

Seth snorted. "Like hell you can."

"Just go get changed," Quill ordered.

Jacob looked down at his T-shirt and jeans. "What for?"

"Because you look like the Unabomber." Sam came up behind Jacob with an amused smirk. "It's been weeks, Jake. It's time to rejoin the world."

Sam might not have been in charge of Jacob anymore as a leader, but considering that it was his couch that Jacob called home, he had little choice but to shower, shave, change into a nicer set of clothes, and let the guys take him to see monster trucks.

It was mindless, stupid and fun. When they dropped him off at midnight, Jacob wasn't expecting anyone to be awake. But Sam was sitting next to the hearth, rocking his son in the dying warmth and light of the fire.

"How was it?" Sam asked, just loud enough to be heard, but not loud enough to wake the baby.

Jacob toed off his boots. In deference to Emily, he lined them up neatly beside the couch before he quietly flopped onto it. "It was monster trucks."

"Enough said," Sam agreed. A moment passed. "They meant well."

"Yeah." Jacob stared at the glowing embers. "Seth met a girl."

"Really? As in..."

Jacob frowned. "It was just a girl he thought was cute. Nothing monumental or life-changing." His frown turned into a scowl. "Why does it all have to be so fucking dramatic?  
Soulmates and imprints...it's like we don't get any choice in any of this...our fucking genes decided it for us and now we're stuck with it and there's nothing we can do about it because it's all fucked up!"

Sam waited patiently until he was done. "You don't think you're the only one who's ever thought that, do you?"

Mollified, Jacob shook his head. "No. I know what you went through with..." He found that he couldn't say her name just yet. At least not without dredging up unwanted memories. "I just wish Seth could get to decide for himself, that's all."

"Whoever's out there for Seth, she will be perfect for him."

"Yeah. If she's not three or seven or even fourteen," Jacob snorted. "What would you have done if Emily had been a kid?"

Sam patted his son's back when the little boy shifted in his sleep. "I'd have waited for her."

"Would you have kept things going with..."

"No," Sam said firmly. "Leah and I would have been done."

"Really?" Jacob pressed.

"What do you want me to say? That I wouldn't have been tempted? I can't say that. Leah is...well...I don't have to tell you. You know." Sam pressed on, even when Jacob looked away. "I need to say something here. Yes, you fucked up, Jake and you fucked up royally...but you weren't the only one. Leah was there, too, and she sure knew better what she was doing than you did."

"It's not her fault."

"She didn't stop it."

Jacob lifted his shoulders. "Doesn't really matter now. Nessie's gone." Puzzled, Sam frowned until he added, "I called the house last week. Got Carlisle." Jake snorted. "Figures he'd be the only one to tell me the truth. Nessie's off touring the world." He paused again, his Adam's apple bobbing. "Pretty soon she'll forget all about me."

"That's not how imprinting works, Jake."

"Yeah, but she didn't imprint on me, did she?" He tried to smile, but failed. "She's still free."

"Emily and your sister and Kim might disagree with you on that," Sam pointed out.

"It's different." Jacob dragged himself to his feet. "It's so totally different, Sam."

"I don't think so," Sam replied. But Jacob was already halfway to the bathroom. Sam looked down at his son's little face. "It's only different if you let it be."

* * *

With Nessie tucked into the massive bed in Alice's suite, sleeping like an angel, Alice reached for her phone.

"Is she all right?" With thousands of miles between her and her daughter, Bella wasn't in the mood for formalities as she answered Alice's call. "Tell me she's all right, Alice."

"I think she's about as all right as you would have been if Edward had slept with Jessica Stanley."

Bella was quiet for a second. "Okay, that was just wrong."

Alice tucked her legs up underneath her tiny body. "I don't know what to tell you. She's hanging on, but she's still hurting. A lot. She's angry at him, but not as much as she wants to be." She paused. "She still loves him."

"That's the way it goes, isn't it?" Bella sighed. "Maybe I shouldn't have let her run away. Maybe I should have made her stay and face things."

"Edward's getting into your head," Alice smirked.

Her sister-in-law snorted delicately. "For going on ten years now."

"If it's okay with you, Bella, I'd like to take Nessie to South America. We never have made good on our promise to visit Zafrina and I think Nessie needs a break from Rosalie's five-star European vacation."

She could hear Bella let out an unnecessary breath. "I don't know..."

"Are you worried about Zafrina?"

"She just got so attached to Nessie back then."

Alice smiled. "I don't think you have to worry about her stealing your baby anymore, Bella."

"All right," Bella gave in. "Let me just run it by Edward and..."

"He's listening on the extension and he's planning to book our plane tickets himself. Isn't that right, Edward?"

There was the tiniest of pauses. "I'm sorry," Edward finally added his voice to the conversation, fortunately with the proper amount of shame for his eavesdropping. "First class?"

"Is there any other way to fly?" Alice asked sweetly. "And we'd prefer non-stop, if possible."

Bella scowled. "You two have no idea how infuriating you can be. Edward..."

"I'm hanging up," he promised his wife.

When she heard the click of the downstairs phone, Alice laughed. "Don't be too hard on him. He's worried sick about Nessie."

"Then why is he so damn eager to send her to South America? He felt the same way about Zafrina as I did."

"I think he's hoping we run into someone else down there."

Bella said nothing for a long moment. "Do you think...that could happen?"

"Anything's possible."

"Do we want that to happen?"

"Honestly?" Alice lifted her petite shoulders. "I have no idea."

"Alice?" Only a vampire could have heard Bella's tiny sniff. "Take care of my little girl."

Alice glanced at her sleeping niece. "Like she was my own."

* * *

To Be Continued


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: Thank you so much for the incredibly kind reviews on the last chapter! I was so happy to find out that people were still interested in the story; it really helped prompt me into going on with it:)

I also want to note that I have adjusted a couple of things in chapter seven and closed up a plot-hole that was annoying me. Just FYI! Enjoy and thank you again!

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

Jacob frowned at the list in his hand. Butter, eggs, milk, brown sugar, juice boxes, lettuce...it went on and on in Emily's perfect printing.

He never should have said he was going into Forks. He never should have asked if he could pick anything up while he was there.

Resigned to his unexpected chore, Jacob wandered the aisles of the supermarket, tossing items into his cart as he located them, not bothering to compare brands or prices. Emily had offered him money, but he'd waved away the bills. He still had a wad of cash in his wallet; the least he could do for the woman who had nursed him back to health was to buy some damn groceries.

In the produce section, just as he'd grabbed a decent-looking head of lettuce, Jacob heard his name. He knew the voice, beyond any doubt, although he hadn't seen the man it belonged to in almost five years.

Not since the day Jacob's father had been laid to rest.

Swallowing heavily, he turned around to see Charlie Swan standing behind him.

The years had been good to Bella's father. There was only a touch more grey at his temples and a few extra lines around his eyes.

"Hey, Chief." He held out his hand and Charlie shook it with vigor. "Really good to see you, sir."

"I told you before," Charlie said with mock severity. "Drop the 'sir' business."

For the first time in a long time, Jacob's mouth twisted into something resembling a smile. "Yes, sir."

Actually serious now, Charlie watched him carefully. "How are you, Jake? You and your sisters? I see Rachel every now and then, but I never..." He hesitated. "Your dad would've wanted me to look after you three better than I have."

Jacob cleared his throat. "It's okay, Chief. They're doing fine."

"And you?"

Charlie always had been more perceptive than he let on. Jacob shifted his weight from one foot to the other as he thought out an answer that wouldn't invite more questions. "Hanging in there," he eventually replied.

"I spoke to Bella at Christmas," the older man went on. "She said you weren't living with the family anymore."

He blew out a short breath. "I'm back on the reservation, yeah. Staying with Sam and Emily."

Charlie hesitated again. "You know, if you ever need a place to crash, Jake, Sue and I would be happy to have you stay with us. Now that Seth's moved out, it seems like a much bigger..."

Jacob cut him off. "Thanks, really, but I'm all right." He held up his list. "I should probably get going."

"Sure." Charlie clapped a hand onto Jacob's shoulder. "The offer stands, though." He stepped back. "See you around, Jake."

As he watched Bella's father push his cart towards the cash registers, Jacob's stomach twisted into painful knots.

How could he have forgotten that Nessie and her grandfather had exactly the same eyes?

* * *

"Ladies and gentlemen, we've been cleared to make our final descent into Manaus. Local time is 8:30 in the evening. We want to thank you for flying with us today and we hope you enjoy your stay in Brazil. Cabin attendants, prepare for landing."

As the captain's announcement had been in Portuguese, neither Alice nor Nessie completely understood it, but they exchanged a smile. Although Edward had gotten them the best seats in the first class cabin, the flight from Paris had been long and they were both ready for a hot shower.

Nessie turned her head to glance out the tiny window. A field of lights stood out on the dark ground below. The city of Manaus sat on a winding bend of the Amazon River; it was a bright spot of civilization in the heart of the rainforest.

It was also home to three vampires: Zafrina, Kachiri and Senna.

Ever since Alice had broached the idea of traveling to South America, Nessie had been struggling to recall the Amazon coven. True, she had been a baby when they'd last met, but she was frustrated at how little she could remember. Pretty pictures. That was it. All she could come up with were a handful of beautiful images. A moon-shaped stretch of pristine beach. A plunging waterfall against a green cliff. Black and brown waters touching, but never mixing.

"Zafrina must have been showing you her home," Alice had said when Nessie shared the images with her. "The Meeting of the Waters is where the Negro River touches the Amazon. It's one of the most famous sights in Brazil."

"I always thought I'd made it up," Nessie had mused.

The night before they left France, she'd dreamed about the waters. Black against brown. Hair against skin. Jacob. She'd woken up in tears and had been forced to bury her face under the covers in order to hide them from her aunt.

They landed a few minutes later and before the plane even reached the terminal, Alice had already texted Bella and Edward to tell them that they had arrived safely.

A minute later, the phone signaled a return message. Alice held it up so that Nessie could read the screen.

_Relieved. Give Nessie our love. Call us soon. _

Nessie watched as Alice slipped her phone back into her Louis Vuitton shoulder bag. "Aren't you going to text Uncle Jazz?"

"I'll call him later." Alice shook her head, amused. "My husband's had to learn a lot of things in 150 years, but he puts his foot down at texting."

After their showdown with the Volturi, an event of which Nessie again had only limited memories, Carlisle had possessed the foresight to maintain working contacts with the majority of the covens who had come to their aid. All it had taken was one phone call and Alice had been supplied not only with a telephone number and an address, but a personal invitation from Zafrina herself for the two of them to stay with the Amazons for a long as they wanted.

From the airport, they took a taxi to the outskirts of the city. Evidently, the idea of the sort of permanent home that the Olympic coven shared had appealed to Zafrina. The taxi took them to a sprawling house that was set back into the forest a good ways from the main road.

It might have been Nessie's imagination, but the driver hadn't seemed at all thrilled when they'd told him the address. Sure enough, though, as soon as Alice handed him a few Brazilian _reais_, he jumped back into his car and sped off.

"_A casa do vampires_," Alice chuckled. "Poor man. At least he'll have a story to tell tonight."

Just then, the front door opened and a tall, dark-skinned woman with a wild tangle of black hair and eyes the color of blood stepped out of the house.

"At last!" Zafrina covered the distance between them in the time it took Nessie to blink. "At last you have come!"

Alice smiled. "It's wonderful to see you again, Zafrina."

Zafrina nodded in acknowledgement, but her stare was fixed on Nessie. "Look at you. In my memories, you are still a child, but now..." She reached for Nessie's hands. "A woman stands in front of me."

When Zafrina's hands grasped hers, Nessie could see a clear picture in her mind. It was of herself as a tiny child. She was seated on Zafrina's lap, clapping her hands and giggling at whatever pretty pictures the vampire was projecting into her mind.

It wasn't exactly a memory of her own, but it was enough to remind Nessie that this wild Amazon woman who had helped save her life was far kinder and more gentle than she appeared.

Nessie squeezed Zafrina's fingers lightly. "Thank you so much for letting us stay with you."

"You, my dear Nessie, are always welcome here. You and your family." She indicated the house. "Come. Let's get you both settled in. We have much catching up to do."

* * *

Only minutes after Edward texted Rosalie in Paris to share the news that Alice and Nessie had arrived safely in Brazil, he received a reply from Emmett.

_good news but rose = pissed. dont xpect us home 4 awhile._

"His texting's gotten better," Bella observed from over her husband's shoulder. When he said nothing, she lowered her chin and kissed him through the sleeve of shirt. "Hey. Come back to me."

With his index finger, he stabbed at the screen of his phone to delete the message. "Why does she have to be such a drama queen?" he fumed. "Nessie's our child, not hers."

Bella didn't bother reminding him that Nessie was the closest thing to a daughter that Rosalie would ever have. "She's not really anyone's child anymore," she observed instead. With a sigh, she rested her cheek on his shoulder. "I miss her."

"I know." Reaching back, Edward laced his fingers through hers. "So do I."

A few minutes of comfortable silence passed until Bella asked, in a cool tone, "So, have you already contacted him?"

Much to her annoyance, he played dumb. "Contacted who, dear?"

It was the "dear" that made Bella push away from him. She slid off the bed and faced her husband with her hands propped up on her hips. "Playing matchmaker for Nessie is creepy and wrong, Edward."

"Getting in touch with an old ally is hardly matchmaking," Edward scoffed. "And even if I just happened to mention to him that a few members of our family just happened to be in South America, that's hardly..."

"Don't you think we've taken enough away from Jacob?" Bella's softly-spoken question forced him to stop. "Really...don't you?"

Edward glanced away. "He broke my daughter's heart. Whatever I did to him in the past, it's nothing compared to that, Bella." He looked back at her with deadly quiet conviction. "Nothing."

Another long silence passed, but it was anything but comfortable. "All this traveling going on," she suddenly said, "It's making me restless. Maybe I should take a trip, too."

Her husband's gorgeous face pulled into a frown. "To Brazil?"

"Much closer than that." Bella started out of the bedroom. "I think I'll go visit my dad." At the last second before she disappeared from his sight, she added a parting shot that hit him like a bullet. "You're not invited."

* * *

To Be Continued


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: The ball is officially rolling. Thank you so much for taking the ride;)

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

Nessie woke to the sight and scent of fresh flowers. At some point while she slept, someone had placed a tall vase of Amazon lilies next to her bed. Zafrina, if she had to guess. She smiled and inhaled deeply.

There were definitely worse ways to start the day.

As she lingered in the bed that had been bought specifically for her use according to Zafrina, Nessie realized that she had no idea what time it was. Heavy curtains on the windows blocked out any trace of light, but it must have been close to noon at least. She felt well-rested even though she'd stayed awake until dawn, answering every single one of Zafrina's questions. School, hobbies, hunting, family...they'd covered everything.

There had only been one question that had stopped her cold.

_"Is there anyone special in your life?"_

Her Prada bag sat on the wooden floor beside the bed. She hung her arm over the side and fished through it until she found her phone. It was only to check the time, but before she could stop herself, Nessie had already dialed.

_You have reached a number that has been disconnected or is no longer in service. If you've reached this message in error, please hang up and dial again, otherwise stay on the line for more.. _

She could feel her lower lip tremble as she lowered the phone from her ear. However there wasn't any time to ponder the implications of the fact that Jacob's cell was out of service. Just then, there was a knock on her door.

"Nessie?" Her aunt's musical voice was muffled through the wood. "Are you awake, honey? Everyone's waiting for you."

Nessie dropped the phone back into her bag. "I'll just be a minute," she managed to reply. But she lied. It took more than a minute to drag herself out of bed and several more to pull on a pair of jeans and tank top.

There was a mirror on the dressing table. She gave herself a cursory examination. Her long bronze curls were tangled, but she didn't bother with a brush. Aunt Rosalie would have had a fit, but Nessie was starting to see why the three Amazons always looked so wild. What was the point of combing your hair if the jungle humidity was just going to frizz it beyond belief the moment you stepped foot outside?

Other than that, she looked paler than usual. She would need blood soon. So would Alice, and although Zafrina and her coven had formed an actual home and tenuous ties to the human world, they had not adopted the Cullens' vegetarian lifestyle.

Uncle Emmett would be so jealous when he learned they had gone hunting in the Amazon rainforest.

On bare feet, Nessie came down the stairs. She wasn't trying to be particularly quiet, yet somehow she managed to make it almost all the way to the entrance of the spacious living room without a single vampire noticing her presence.

She knew this because the topic of their conversation just happened to be her...and it didn't stop.

"It was Rosalie's idea to get her out of the country. Edward hated it, but Bella knew it was what she needed." Alice paused. "Still, I think we all realized that a few weeks in Europe wasn't going to make her forget him."

Kachiri clicked her tongue sadly. "_Crianca pobre_," she murmured. Poor child. Nessie's Portuguese was limited to a few words; she tried not to bristle at those paticular ones.

"Her heart is too young to have been handled so carelessly." Zafrina's words were as pretty as her pictures, but there was a dangerous tone beneath them. Like a mother bear protecting her cub.

"I remember this Jacob," Senna suddenly said. "Very tall. Smelled of a wild dog. Never took his eyes off the _bebe_. We worried until it was explained..." She trailed off.

Zafrina picked up where her sister left off. "What do you intend to do about him?"

It took Alice a second to reply, like the question had caught her off guard. "Jacob made a huge mistake, for sure, but he could never be our enemy," Alice finally said. "Not after everything he's done for us."

Nessie let out a pent-up breath. She hadn't exactly been worried for Jacob's life, especially considering that he could more than take care of himself even without the rest of the pack, but then again, she had never seen her father raise his fist to anyone before.

"We made the call," Kachiri said a second later. "He'll arrive tonight. Somehow, he already knew."

"Edward must have made a call of his own," Alice sighed. "No wonder Bella is on her way to Forks without him."

Who was coming? What did he know about? Why were her parents separated? Nessie was so caught up in these questions that she didn't realize she took a step forward. Her bare foot landed on a creaky board in the floor and the noise shot through the house.

There was sudden silence and although she couldn't see it, she could sense four sets of vampire eyes swinging in the general direction of the foyer.

"Nessie?" she heard Alice ask.

Throwing back her shoulders, Nessie silently counted to five and fixed an innocent smile onto her face before she stepped into the living room. The room was circular, lined from floor to ceiling in spotless windows that offered a panoramic view of the lush rainforest and the endless brown river in the distance.

There was just enough light to make her skin glow and to turn the vampires into diamonds. A human would have been blinded by the beauty of it all.

"Good morning," she greeted them as if she hadn't heard a word of their discussion. "What are we doing today?"

* * *

To Charlie's credit, when Bella showed up on his doorstep unannounced, he hid his shock well.

He only searched her face for a minute before he gave up his quest to find any sort of change or sign of aging. The fact that her hair was the exact same length, color and style as it had been seven years earlier seemed to escape his notice. He didn't even linger on her eyes which, even with a pair of colored contacts, were just a shade too golden-brown.

But when his cheek touched hers as they awkwardly embraced, the temperature of her skin made him shudder involuntarily.

And athough she understood his human instincts, it still hurt.

Her father offered her a warm, if slightly forced smile. "I've missed you, Bells."

"Same here." Bella hesitated. "I should have called."

Charlie shook his head. "No. This is still home." And with that, he reached for the overnight bag she'd packed and slung it over his shoulder. "Come on in."

Sue Clearwater was less subtle in her examination of Bella's eternally youthful face, and Bella was pretty sure that her hair and eyes didn't go unnoticed by her, but she welcomed her stepdaughter with genuine feeling and immediately set about fixing up her old bedroom, as if Bella would actually be sleeping that night.

While she was upstairs, Charlie poured two cups of coffee and unknowingly offered one to his daughter. She took it and lifted it to her lips at the same time he took a real sip from his own mug.

"So." A couple of seconds ticked by as her father searched for something to say. "What's new?"

"I was going to ask you the same thing."

Charlie smoothed down his mustache and shrugged. "Had to hire two more deputies last month. Town's growing. It'll be like Seattle soon."

"I think you've got a few years before that happens," she smirked.

He nodded. "Yeah, a few." Another minute passed. "How's my beautiful granddaughter?"

Bella set her cup down. Trust Charlie to hit the nail on the head, whether he'd been aiming for it or not. "She's...it's not..." Bella tried again, "She's having a tough time. And I don't know what to do for her, Dad."

Charlie blinked. "Bells, if you came here for parenting advice..." He lifted his shoulders. "You should know you pretty much raised yourself. Your mother and I just kept a roof over your head."

"You did more than that," she assured him. "But I didn't really come here for advice. I just...I have to...I need to tell you..." Tilting her head back, Bella stared at the ceiling until the right words came to her. "I get it now. And I'm sorry."

Now he was confused. "What are we talking about?"

"I get why you were so angry with Edward...with me sometimes," Bella clarified. "I can see now what it must have been like for you back then...and I am so sorry. For all the times I disappeared or ran away or got hurt or just plain broke down." She twisted her wedding ring around her finger. "I put you through hell, Dad."

Charlie's mouth twitched. "Wasn't a picnic, for sure. But, then, no one ever said raising a teenage girl was supposed to be easy."

"You had it worse than most."

"I don't see it that way." He shrugged again. "I mean, just look how you turned out."

Bella couldn't meet his eyes. "Yeah," she whispered. Married, pregnant and dead straight out of high school. Every parent's dream. "Right."

Charlie surprised her when he reached out and lifted her chin. There was no shudder this time, as if he had decided that her cold skin wasn't going to bother him anymore than her unnatural eyes and never-changing face. "Right," he insisted.

She smiled softly. "What was your secret then?"

"No secret. You're my daughter, Bells. There isn't anything you could do that would make me stop caring about you." He patted her cheek. "I know you feel the same way about Nessie, so whatever it is that she's going through, you'll get through it, too. Besides," he added with a chuckle. "How much trouble can a seven year-old get into?"

Because she couldn't think of anything to say, she just nodded dumbly.

Charlie drained his coffee. "Now, I know you just got here, but maybe you can give me a hand outside? There's a tree down in the backyard and I figure that with your help, I just might be able to move it."

Move it? The only challenge for her would be in not throwing it.

There was only so much that Charlie could be expected to overlook.

* * *

"You can do this," Jacob told himself. "You've seen it a hundred times. It's not rocket science." He took a deep breath and repeated, "You can do this."

On the table in front of him, Sam Jr. kicked his chubby legs and waved his fists as if he was cheering Jacob on.

Or maybe he just wanted out of his soiled diaper.

Taking another deep breath, but holding it in this time, Jacob ripped the diaper open and was greeted with the sight of the foulest substance ever produced in the history of mankind. Even Brianna, who had attached herself to Jacob's leg practically ever since her parents had left the house for dinner and a movie, crinkled her nose before yanking her pink shirt up over her face.

"Stinky, stupid baby," she accused her brother. He gurgled in reply and blew a spit bubble.

Jacob's lungs burned as he folded up the dirty diaper, wiped the kid as clean as he could, shook powder over everything, and reached for a fresh diaper. Only when he fixed the last sticky tab into place did he start breathing again.

Sam gave him a smile of appreciation that was all gums.

"Can you drop the next load on your parents, kid?" Jacob asked as he tugged the baby's pajamas back into place. "I'll buy you a beer when you turn eighteen if you can hold off until they get back."

Brianna dared to emerge from her shirt. She sniffed the air dramatically before inquiring, as only a five year-old can, "Where does poop come from?"

_Hell_, he wanted to reply. But he just picked Sam Jr. up and guided Brianna back to the couch where they had been watching TV before the tell-tale odor had interrupted them. "Ask your dad," he told her.

Sam Jr., or Sammy as Jacob was starting to think of him, was fast asleep long before the movie ended, but Brianna was wide awake. In fact, the animated story about a fairy princess had her practically bouncing off the walls.

Jacob threw his head back against the couch as she started turning circles in front of the TV in time to the music playing through the credits.

"Uncle Jake!" She bounced back onto the couch, snapping him to attention. "Can I have a cookie?"

With a sigh, Jacob tugged the end of her braid. "Help me put your brother to bed and you can have some milk." _Warmed. With a touch of Valium. _

Ten minutes later, they sat down at the kitchen table with the baby monitor and two glasses of milk. Brianna drank deeply and wound up with a foamy white mustache.

"Are you good at telling stories?" she asked, oblivious. "Daddy tells good stories. Mommy, too, but Daddy says it's in his blood."

Jacob lifted his shoulder. "I'm all right, I guess. I used to tell stories all the time to..." He stopped short. "But that was awhile ago."

It was too late, though. Brianna's dark brown eyes had already lit up. "Tell me one!" When he hesitated, her lower lip protruded and wobbled.

He was a goner.

"Okay, okay!" Clearing his throat, Jacob started, "Once upon a time, there was a..."

"Fairy princess!" she supplied.

"Fairy princess," he reluctantly agreed. "And she was the most beautiful fairy in the land. So beautiful, in fact, that she had two princes from different countries who wanted to marry her." He paused for a second too long. "She had to choose between them, even though she loved them both. So...she picked the first prince and they were married. She became a queen. And after awhile, they had a baby."

Brianna frowned suddenly. "Like Sam?" This thought, that a fairy queen could ever produce something as loud and smelly as her brother, clearly repulsed her.

Jacob shook his head. "No, it was a little girl. A perfect little girl. A princess." Mollified by this, Brianna waited for him to go on. "She was even more beautiful than her mother. And she was magical. She wasn't like any other baby who had ever been born. When the second prince saw her..." Jacob trailed off. There was a lump in his throat, but he couldn't seem to swallow it.

"What happened?" Brianna demanded.

It was a struggle to go on. "When the second prince saw her, he knew right then that he would always, always protect her. And someday, when she was grown up, he would love her even more than he had loved her mother."

A shadow crossed Jacob's face. "But after a few years, the second prince started to think that it wasn't right to love the fairy queen's daughter because even though her magic made her grow up fast, she was still so young. So when a witch...a good witch...came along, he kissed her, betraying the love he had for the little princess."

Brianna blinked. "Why would he kiss a witch?"

"Because...she was lonely and he was confused and...you know...crap happens, kid." Jacob plunged on, "When the princess found out, she was...her heart was broken...because she loved the prince, too. More than he realized. Her father, the other prince, was so angry that he banished the second prince from the kingdom. The queen put her daughter into a deep sleep, to keep her from crying. And the second prince...he ran as far away as he could."

"What happened next?"

"I don't know, Brianna-bear." Jacob couldn't keep his hand from shaking as he reached across the table and wiped the milk off the little girl's upper lip. "I'll tell you when I do."

* * *

To Be Continued


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: Thank you so, so much for all of the incredible feedback on the story. I am tickled pink that you're enjoying it!

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

Carlisle found Edward in the room he shared with Bella. His son was at the window, staring out into the woods as if his wife would emerge from them at any minute. Debussy poured from the speakers of his music dock at a volume that would have allowed Carlisle to enter the room unnoticed if Edward hadn't been able to read his mind before he'd even stepped foot inside.

"I'm fine," he told Carlisle before his father said so much as a single word. "Tell Esme not to worry about me."

"That would be like asking the sun not to set tonight." Carlisle lowered the volume back to a reasonable level. Edward didn't turn around or even acknowledge the change. "So, am I going to have to write a note to the school explaining your absence, as well?"

"You know, mono is highly contagious. They're probably wondering why Jasper and I haven't caught it yet."

Ignoring his sarcasm, Carlisle came up beside him. "I know you miss Bella and Nessie."

Edward snorted softly. "That doesn't even begin to describe it."

"We all miss them."

His son's jaw clenched. "You didn't drive them away."

"Neither did you." Carlisle put a hand on his shoulder. "Edward..."

Jerking away, Edward paced to the other end of the room. "You have no idea what I did."

"I know that whatever it was, you only did it because you truly believed it was the right thing to do." Carlisle lifted his shoulders. "I know you, son."

Edward raked his hands through his hair. "Bella thinks I'm trying to punish Jacob." He paused. "Maybe I am a little, but I swear, Carlisle...my first thought was Nessie. She's always my first thought."

"As it should be," his father murmured. "You want to protect her."

"From everything. Everyone."

Carlisle took a step towards him. "Edward, what did you do?"

"I made a phone call." Carlisle waited for him to go on. "To Chile," he finally added. His father said nothing, but in his mind, he fit the pieces together. Edward held up his hands, as if to ward off Carlisle's silent disapproval. "I know! It was rash and I should have talked to Bella first. But Nessie needs to meet him. She needs to know that she has options!"

Carlisle sighed. "Edward, I understand why you would do this. I truly do. But I want you to consider something: after you met Bella, you had options, too."

Edward shook his head. "No, I didn't."

"Yes, you did. You just didn't see them as such." He smiled. "I'm sure Kate's ego will recover from that someday."

"It's not the same," Edward insisted. "Bella...she was it for me. Like Esme was for you. And..."

"Jacob is for Nessie?" Carlisle ignored his son's scowl. "The heart wants what it wants, without rhyme or reason or even common sense, more often than not. And it certainly isn't up to us as parents to make decisions of the heart for our children. If it was, do you think Esme and I would have stood back and watched you fall in love with an especially fragile human?"

Edward folded his arms. "You don't think I should want the best for my daughter?"

"I think it isn't up to us to judge who is or is not the best for her. That decision is Nessie's and Nessie's alone."

"She's so young, Carlisle." He stared off into the distance without seeing anything. "I thought...I'd have a few more years before..." Edward trailed off. A second later, he cursed. "Sorry," he immediately apologized.

"I have heard the word before." Carlisle approached him and grasped his shoulders. "Call Bella. Our family's fractured enough as it is." When Edward nodded, Carlisle released him and left the room, closing the door behind him.

Edward grabbed his phone and stared at the menu screen for a long time before he pulled up his contacts list.

* * *

Bella had never realized how little she must have eaten when she was human, but when she barely touched her dinner, Charlie was completely unfazed. He was even a little amused.

"It's not a comment on your cooking," he assured Sue. "Bells has never been big on eating."

Sue tried to return his smile, but the rest of the meal passed in awkward silence. Afterwards, when Charlie left to check in at the station, Bella offered to do the dishes, but Sue wouldn't hear of it.

"You're a guest, Bella." Realizing what she'd just implied, Sue put a hand to her mouth. "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean that like it sounded."

"It's all right." She tucked her hands into the back pockets of her jeans. "Sue...I know it seems silly. All this pretending. But I just think it's easier on him if I try to act like I'm still...the way I was before." Bella paused. "I don't like reminding him that I'm technically dead."

Sue reluctantly nodded her agreement. "I can certainly understand that."

A moment passed. "I am really glad he has you." Sue turned to see her. "He's happy," Bella went on. "You don't know how much that means to me."

"You should visit more," Sue blurted out a second later. "He misses you."

Bella lowered her chin. "I'll definitely try."

"Why don't you take a trip into the woods?" Sue's suggestion made her look up. "No one goes hungry in my house."

Because Sue was smiling, Bella offered her a smile of her own. "I won't be gone long."

She was in such a hurry to feed and get back that she didn't realize she left her phone behind. She wouldn't see the missed call from her husband until the next day.

Only a mile from the house, Bella took down a large deer. The blood revived her and she considered heading back, but she ultimately decided not to take a single chance while she was staying so near the town.

She had just caught the scent of a second deer when another, more powerful scent captured her attention. It was close, much closer than her instincts liked.

A branch snapped behind her and she whipped around. Her eyes scanned the darkness like it was broad daylight until she located the source of the noise. And the smell...

Unbidden, a low growl rose up in the back of her throat. Her nails dug into the flesh of her palms as her hands balled into fists. Every muscle in her body was taut, ready at any second to attack.

"Bella." The person on the other side of the clearing was obviously shocked to see her, but seemed determined to hide that surprise behind a layer of cool venom. "It's been awhile."

Her teeth were clenched, but she managed to hiss, "Yes, it has been, Leah."

* * *

After a long day of sight-seeing, Nessie and Alice returned to the house to find a handwritten note on the table in the foyer.

_Went out for dinner. Make yourselves comfortable. We will return soon._

Nessie stared at the word 'dinner,' written so casually in what she assumed was Zafrina's beautiful script. "Aunt Alice..."

Alice eased the note out of her hand. "Try not to think about it, sweetheart." She put her arm around Nessie and started steering her towards the living room. "I know it's hard."

"How many do you think they'll..." She couldn't make herself say the word.

Her aunt sat her down on a white leather couch. "Nessie, you have to understand that what we do...or rather what we don't do...it's not the usual way. The natural way."

Her forehead crinkled. "How can not killing people be unnatural?" She didn't expect an answer, which was good because Alice didn't have one.

"Do you want to leave?" Alice watched her niece carefully. "If it's too much, we can go."

Nessie shook her head. "No." She lifted her chin to meet her aunt's concerned eyes. "It's okay. I mean...it's not okay, okay, but it's...you know...it is what it is."

"What about you?" Alice went on, "Are you okay? Do you need to hunt?"

"I don't want blood right now."

Her aunt blinked at her vehemence. "All right. But you should eat something."

"So should you," Nessie reminded her.

Alice inclined her head. "Let's get you settled first."

Twenty minutes later, after raiding the kitchen and discovering that Zafrina's preparations for their arrival had included storing several days worth of meals in the otherwise-empty fridge, Nessie dipped into a bowl of delicious beef and bean stew.

"Aunt Alice," she said between spoonfuls. "Please go hunt. I don't want Uncle Jazz thinking I took horrible care of you."

The corner of Alice's lips turned up as she gave in. "All right. But I won't go past where I can see the house. And I'll have my phone in case you need me."

"I'll be fine," Nessie insisted. "They showed me how to work the TV last night." She smiled and it wasn't even entirely forced. "Go."

After kissing her niece's forehead, Alice slipped out of the house.

Nessie finished her dinner, rinsed her dishes and left them to dry by the sink. The house was eerily silent with only a single occupant. She spent a few minutes just exploring the first floor. Kitchen, living room, guest bathroom...everything was spotless, bare, devoid of color or ornanment.

All the white walls and open spaces would have driven her grandmother crazy. Esme would not have rested until every inch of the gorgeous home in the jungle was tastefully and artfully decorated. Nessie sniffed as she pictured her grandmother surrounded by blueprints and fabric swatches. She missed her terribly.

Back in the living room, she settled down on the couch and turned on the gigantic television set that even rivaled the one Uncle Emmett had bought for the family. Everything was in Portuguese or Spanish, Nessie quickly realized after flipping a few channels, but she eventually found a dubbed American movie she'd already seen.

It took her a couple of seconds to remember when she'd seen it. Jacob had rented it and they'd watched it together.

Nessie hit a button on the remote control and the screen went black. It was too late, though. She could recall everything now, just as if it had happened the day before. How tiny she felt sitting next to his wonderfully solid body. How good he smelled, like fresh air and clean earth. How the rumble of his laughter made her stomach twist into happy knots.

Her chest rose and fell as she struggled to push the memories back into the far recesses of her mind. But it wasn't any use. She could feel the tears coming and there was no one she needed to hide them from.

There was also no one to help her through them.

Almost the very second that Nessie laid her cheek down on the cool leather of the throw pillow beside her, ready for a good, long cry, the doorbell rang.

She shot up, instantly on guard. Alice hadn't been gone long enough to be back already. Zafrina and the others certainly wouldn't ring their own doorbell. And she doubted the coven got many neighbors dropping by.

With tears drying on her cheeks, Nessie hesitated until whoever was at the door rang the bell a second time. By the third ring, she had made up her mind. She raced to the door and pulled it open.

The first thing she saw was a short braid of thick, black hair.

Her breath caught in her throat. "Jake?"

The head turned and her lungs deflated. The man standing at the door wasn't Jacob, but he was very, very familiar.

His eyes were the color of dark amber and they pierced straight through her. "Can it be?" His voice was deep, laced with an exotic accent. "Are you Renesmee?"

Nessie wanted to look away, but found that she couldn't. "I am," she heard herself answer. She searched his impossibly handsome face. "I know you...don't I?"

"We have met," he confirmed. "But it has been years." The man's gaze slid down the length of her body. "And you have grown...so beautiful."

Her flawless cheeks flushed pink. "Who are you?"

He took her hand and grasped it between his own. "Nahuel." He drew her fingers up to his lips and brushed a kiss across them. "I have been waiting for you for a very long time, Renesmee."

* * *

To Be Continued


	11. Chapter 11

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: Has everyone seen the first pictures of Nessie from the Breaking Dawn set? She's perfect, if a bit older than I imagined. Is it November yet?

Thank you so much for all the incredible feedback on the story so far:) Enjoy!

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

Was it wrong that Leah's obvious shock at seeing her pleased Bella ever so slightly?

"I was just on my way to see my mother," she said before Bella even asked. "I didn't...didn't know you were visiting."

"That's the thing about my kind," Bella replied, sweet as pie. "You never see us coming."

Leah shifted her weight from one foot to the other. Bella looked her up and down with a cool eye. She had never given a damn about fashion, but she made a mental note to thank Alice for the Dries van Noten ensemble she now wore. It was kicking the hell out of Leah's jeans and T-shirt.

Petty, yes. But when she remembered the anguish on Nessie's face after Jacob's confession...she just couldn't bring herself to care.

"Where's the rest of your happy little family?" Leah sneered.

Bella folded her arms over her thousand-dollar coat and tried to remember that if she could forgive Jacob, she could certainly forgive Leah for her part in hurting Nessie.

But she sure wasn't making it easy.

"Different places. They're all fine, thank you for asking. Even my daughter is doing much better." At the mention of Nessie, Leah's stare shifted away for a split second. "She's on an extended vacation, you could say," Bella went on. "Exploring the world with her aunts."

Leah tried to sneer again, but it came off weak with jealousy. "Must be nice."

"I don't know that I'd say that. It's just what she needs right now." A minute ticked by as Leah tried not to squirm under the unnatural weight of Bella's stare. "But enough about us," Bella finally said. "How are you, Leah? Are you seeing anyone special these days?"

"Okay, that's it!" Leah exploded. "I know you know I slept with Jake, so why don't you just drop the fucking act and say whatever it is you want to say to me?"

Bella lifted her shoulders. "I don't really want to say anything to you."

"Bullshit," Leah spat. "You looked like you wanted to rip my throat out a minute ago."

"Mother's instincts," Bella apologized.

"I wouldn't know anything about that." There was just the barest wobble in her voice, but it was enough to put out the last embers of Bella's anger towards her stepsister.

A few long seconds passed before Bella softly asked, "I just want to know...are you in love with Jacob?"

"What? Don't make me laugh," Leah shot back, just a little too quickly and loudly to be true.

Bella unfolded her arms and slipped her hands into her pockets. "He's very easy to love, isn't he?"

"And what the hell would you know about that?" Leah snapped. "You never loved him. You just used him until you got your blood-sucker back."

In her pockets, Bella's hands curled into fists, but she kept her face a mask of cool composure. "It doesn't matter what I felt or didn't feel for him. What matters is who Jacob fell in love with." She paused. "And in the end...it wasn't either of us."

Even in the dark, Bella could see tears forming in Leah's eyes. She tried to wipe them away with her arm, but it was too late. "Story of my fucking life."

"I'm sorry, Leah."

"I don't want your pity." Leah fought back the last of her tears. "And if you're standing over there trying to forgive me or whatever, fuck you. I haven't done anything wrong. Neither has Jake."

Bella inclined her chin. "I never said he did. Or that you did."

Leah stared at her before she slowly shook her head. "I'll never get you leeches. You're like walking ice cubes. Cool to the core. Does that happen when you die or just when you start thinking people are food?"

"If you want to spend some time alone with your mother, I'll make myself scarce," Bella said a second later, taking a step backwards before she did something she would regret forever. "You might not believe this, but I understand how hard things have been for you, Leah. If I can offer some advice...you know...as your stepsister..." She ignored Leah's scowl. "Find some happiness somewhere." Bella smiled tightly. "No one likes a bitter bitch."

Rosalie would have been proud of her and that alone told Bella that she'd gone too far.

There likely wouldn't be any Cullen-Swan-Clearwater family reunions in the near future.

* * *

Before Nessie had gathered her scattered thoughts and vague memories, Nahuel had invited himself inside the house. He had only one bag with him and he left it in the foyer on his way into the kitchen.

"You've been here before?" Nessie asked as he dug into the fridge.

"Many times," Nahuel answered. He pulled out the same stew that had been Nessie's dinner. "Senna is a very good cook and I am her only, how do you say, guinea pig." After putting the bowl into the microwave, he leaned against the white-tiled counter that stretched between them. "So," he began. "You do remember me?"

"A little." Hugging herself, she rubbed her bare arms as if she needed the warmth. "But I don't know if I'm actually remembering you or if I've just heard the story so many times that I've sort of created you in my head. Does that make sense?"

Nahuel smiled; his brilliantly white teeth stood out against his dark brown skin. "Perfect sense. You were very young."

"I didn't really understand what was going on back then." Nessie shook her hair back as she looked up at him. "But you saved my life. You saved my family's lives."

He dismissed those deeds with a shake of his head. "They were the brave ones. All I did was take a trip to America."

"Still..." Their eyes met. "Thank you."

This time, he didn't wave off the sentiment. "It was my honor, Renesmee."

The mircowave came to a stop with a shrill beep and Nahuel reached inside for his bowl. "Feijoada is Senna's specialty." He took a bite and nodded in pure satisfaction. "Almost better than blood."

"I thought it was delicious," Nessie agreed.

His teak-colored eyes twinkled. "But not better than blood?"

"Sometimes nothing tastes better than blood," she admitted with a blush.

Nahuel took another bite. "Wait until you taste the local cuisine. Jaguar is my favorite."

It was a conversation she could never have had with Jacob.

"You don't...I mean...I didn't think you did, but I didn't know if you..." Nessie's blush burned her cheeks.

"I don't kill," Nahuel said gently. "Not anymore. And I thank your father for that." She lowered her eyes. "I spoke to him recently. He misses you very much."

"I miss him. We've never been apart like this before. I just..." She stopped, her face hidden behind a fragrant curtain of bronze curls.

"Renesmee..." Nahuel had just started to reach for her hand when they heard a noise from the back entrance. They weren't alone anymore...and Nessie had no idea if she was grateful for that fact or not.

Alice entered the kitchen and stopped short at the scene in front of her. As Nahuel ate his stew, Nessie watched him with something halfway between curiosity and fascination. The empty look in her eyes was gone, at least temporarily, and there was color in her cheeks.

She cleared her throat. "I'm back."

"Aunt Alice," Nessie said, her gaze never leaving the new arrival. "Look who came to visit."

Nahuel abandoned his dinner in order to cross the kitchen and take Alice's hand. "It has been too long, dear Alice," he declared. "How is your Jasper? Missing you, no doubt?"

"He's good, thank you." She offered Nahuel a warm, if slightly stiff smile. "I'll tell him you asked." Alice turned to her niece. "Nessie?" She waited until the girl tore herself away from the newcomer and glanced at her. "Can I talk to you for a second?"

It bothered Alice that Nessie looked back at Nahuel. He gave her a small smile, as if granting her permission to follow her aunt into the living room.

Once they were alone, Nessie refolded her arms with a slight frown. "You knew he was coming, didn't you?" Alice hesitated. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I don't know," Alice replied with a sigh. "I should have. Nessie..."

"Aunt Alice?" Nessie interrupted her. "I think I'd like it if you used my real name from now on. Nessie is just...it's a little girl's name, don't you think?"

Alice forgot to blink. "It's never bothered you before."

"I never really thought about it until now."

Her aunt nodded slowly. "All right. Well, Renesmee, I was thinking while I was out...maybe you'd like to call your parents tonight. Or Esme? She'd love to hear from you. So would Carlisle."

"Sure," Nessie nodded with a touch of impatience. "Why not? I bet Nahuel would like to say to hi to them, too."

"Nessie..." Alice corrected herself, "Renesmee..." She stopped and sighed again. "Never mind." Alice had to reach up to touch her niece's cheek. "It's been awhile since I've seen you so..."

"So...what?" Nessie prompted a second later.

_Happy. _

Alice shook her head. "Nothing. It's nothing."

Nessie flashed her a weird look. "Okay." With that, she left her aunt alone in the living room as she headed back into the kitchen.

Back to Nahuel.

Alice looked up at the vaulted ceiling so far above her head. A long time ago, Edward had joked about Nahuel giving Jacob some healthy competition for Nessie's affections.

It didn't seem so funny anymore.

* * *

_Nessie was lying beside him, gloriously naked and rosy with pleasure. They faced each other; his hand cupped the graceful curve of her waist while her fingers explored the damp hair at his temple. _

_"I love you," she whispered._

_He was lost in her bottomless brown eyes. His palm slid over the round hill of her hip and down the silky length of her leg. Her long lashes fluttered madly when he found the damp heat between her thighs. _

_"Please, Jake..." _

He woke suddenly. Painfully. It was dark and he was alone on Sam's couch.

Jacob closed his eyes, as if he could wish away the arousal that still lingered in his blood. He was hot and stiff and miserable, aching for something that was so far out of his reach.

It took a lot of effort to get up, but there were chores that he needed to get out of the way, before the family woke. After forcing himself to his feet, Jacob pulled on his boots and quietly snuck out of the house.

Frost crunched beneath his feet as he made his way to the woodpile near the edge of the forest. Maybe they didn't need so much kindling anymore as the first signs of spring were appearing all over the mountains, but it felt good to grab the axe and start chopping.

After fifteen minutes, the throbbing ache below his waist had subsided and he was left with nothing but the usual, gnawing emptiness.

As he raised his arm to wipe away the sweat from his forehead with the long sleeve of his shirt, Jacob had the very certain, very unsettling feeling that he was being watched.

"Whoever's out there," his voice reverberated through the silent woods, "I can and will out-run you."

He heard a snort and turned towards the noise just in time to see Leah emerge from the trees. "You wish."

His gut twisted with a mixture of guilt, annoyance and relief. "What are you doing here?"

She winced the harshness of his tone and Jacob's guilt tripled. But what could he do about it? The last time they were alone together, he made the biggest mistake of his life. He wasn't about to let history repeat itself.

Leah squared her shoulders. "I was in the neighborhood."

As she came closer, Jacob couldn't help but notice that she looked like hell. Her clothes were tattered, like his always were after he carried them around as a wolf. There were dead leaves in her hair and her skin was streaked with dirt. Her feet were bare.

"Have you been out all night?" he asked.

Her eyes narrowed. "Would you care if I had been?"

Jacob raised the axe again and brought it down on a log, sending splinters of wood flying. "What do you want, Leah?"

"A lot of shit I can't have," she retorted. When he refused to meet her eyes, she sniffed and crossed her arms over her full breasts. "Have you seen Seth around? I can never find him anymore."

"He has a new girlfriend." Jacob tossed a freshly-cut log onto the woodpile. "Met her at the monster truck rally awhile back."

Leah rolled her eyes. "What a catch."

"He's happy." Jacob kicked another log into place. "Let him be happy."

Leah watched him chop at the log for a few minutes. Dawn was creeping ever closer; whenever he snuck a glance at her out of the corner of his eye, more of her face was visible in the approaching light.

He had just raised the axe on a particularly tough log when Leah finally spoke again. "I thought I was pregnant."

The axe missed the log and cut into the half-frozen ground. Jacob's chest rose and fell; his breath came in short bursts, swirling in the cold air around his face until she continued.

"I was sick all the time. Dizzy. Everything felt sore." Leah paused long enough to make Jacob's heart start pounding. "So I went to the doctor..." After another second, she jerked her head from side to side.

He forced himself to swallow. What was he supposed to say? 'I'm sorry' would have been a lie.

"I wouldn't have told you if I had been." Leah lifted her chin defiantly. "You wouldn't have wanted it, but I..." She choked on the words. "I did, Jake. I really wanted...to be a mother..."

His head screamed in protest, but his heart compelled him to cross the distance between them and wrap his arms around her. She put up a valiant fight, but he held on, ignoring the curses and fists that she hurtled at him. After awhile, her tears overcame her anger and she gave up. If he hadn't been holding her so tightly, she would have collapsed to the ground.

With her face buried against his chest, Leah's sobs shook her entire body. He rested his chin on the top of her head and let her cry.

That was how Sam found them a few minutes later.

"Jake?"

At the sound of his voice, Jacob let his arms fall to his sides as Leah took a step backwards. Without a word and with barely a glance at Sam, Leah phased and sprinted away. They both watched the sleek grey wolf disappear into the forest.

"I never knew I was capable of hurting someone so much," Jacob murmured.

Sam cleared his throat. "Yeah." After a moment, he clapped a hand on Jacob's shoulder. "Come on. Emily's making breakfast."

But Jacob had no appetite, not even for buttermilk pancakes and bacon. All he could see in his mind was the baby that could have been.

* * *

To Be Continued


	12. Chapter 12

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: I am so very grateful for every single word of every single review. Thank you. Enjoy!

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

After a thirty-minute boat ride down the twisting Amazon river and an hour's hike through the dense rainforest, Nessie found herself in what could only be described as heaven on earth.

She had no words for the beauty of the hidden waterfall to which Nahuel had guided her. The sapphire blue pool against the emerald green foliage, the dramatic cascade of water over the rocky shelf, the dappled sunlight through the sky-scraping trees...it was beyond anything she had ever seen before, even in Zafrina's pretty pictures.

And being there to see it was almost worth the fight she'd had with her aunt that morning.

When Nahuel had mentioned the waterfall over breakfast, it had never occurred to Nessie that Alice would have any reservations about her making the trip. After all, Zafrina, Senna and Kachiri were all for it. Senna even offered to pack them a picnic.

So when Alice knocked on Nessie's door while she was changing clothes, she let her aunt in, assuming she was only there to help her pick out a bathing suit from the pile she'd brought.

_"Renesmee," Alice said as she watched Nessie compare a blue and white flowered traditional bikini and a more sporty black tankini. "I wish you'd reconsider this." _

_Nessie turned her head towards her aunt. "What do you mean?" _

_"I mean...hiking into the jungle with Nahuel...alone..." Alice crossed her legs and folded her hands at her knee. "It may send the wrong signal to him." _

_She frowned. "What signal is that?" Alice gave her a look. "Oh my god, Aunt Alice! It's just a hike!"_

_"I don't think you should be going alone, that's all." _

_"Do you want to be our chaperone?" Nessie laughed. "That's very 19th century of you." _

_"Honey, I am 19th century." Alice stood up. "You know perfectly well that I can't go. It's broad daylight in an area that's open to the public." _

_With the flowered bikini in her hand, Nessie crossed her arms. "So, what do you want me to do? Tell Nahuel I'm not going because my aunt thinks he's going to ravage me in the jungle?" _

_Alice put her hands on her hips. "First, I want you to lose the attitude. Second, I want you to be mature enough to realize that not every man who enters your life is going to be as honorable as your uncles or your father or...forgive me...Jacob." _

_Nessie flinched at his name. "Are you saying that Nahuel's not honorable?"_

_"I didn't say that." _

_But Nessie ignored her. "My whole life, all you've ever told me about him was how he risked his own life to come to Forks and save mine. He's been a freaking hero in my bedtime stories. And now you've suddenly decided that he's some kind of duplicitous lech because he's nice enough to show me some of the sights that the rest of you literally can't visit?" _

_Alice counted to ten. "I really don't want to fight with you. I've told you my concerns. What you do now is entirely up to you." _

_"Yeah." Nessie turned on her heel and headed for the bathroom. "It is." _

The roar of the waterfall drowned out Nahuel's voice, but he captured Nessie's full attention when he shrugged off the backpack that contained their lunch, grabbed the back of his T-shirt and tugged it over his head, leaving him in just a long pair of shorts.

He could have been a model. Nessie was no stranger to bare male chests, but Nahuel had one of the best she'd ever seen.

Not, however, the best. That honor was reserved for the one person she was determined not to think about right then, as she was eyeing another man.

Nahuel pulled off his shoes and looked at her expectantly.

Nessie let her own backpack fall to the ground and started on her shirt buttons. When she let her cut-off denim skirt puddle around her feet, she suddenly realized that her bikini had seemed to have a whole lot more material back at the house than it did when it was the only thing covering her body from Nahuel's stare.

But like the gentleman she believed him to be, Nahuel just grinned at her before diving into the shallow pool. He surfaced ten yards out, near the waterfall, his black hair slicked back from his forehead.

"What are you waiting for?" he beckoned her.

She kicked off her sandals and approached the edge of the water. It was cold, probably too cold for a normal human, but she waded out to her knees without a second thought.

Nahuel's laughter carried over the sound of the waterfall. "All the way, Renesmee."

After shooting him a look, Nessie took a breath and dove under the lapping waves. With her eyes closed, she swam until she felt the water temperature grow even colder. Knowing she was near the falls, she surfaced and opened her eyes.

Nahuel was right next to her. He watched as she wiped the water from her face. "I come here whenever I can," he yelled to be heard over the falls. "Can you see why?"

Her feet touched the bottom, but just barely. Nahuel, however, was standing with no problem. Tilting her head back, Nessie looked up at the canopy of heavy trees above. Her gaze followed the beams of light that shone down to the ground wherever there was a break in the dense green leaves until she was looking back into his eyes.

"I love it," she told him. "It's paradise."

Treading water, Nessie had no way of stopping him from reaching out and peeling a wet strand of hair from her cheek. "Paradise," he echoed. Seconds ticked by, but his fingers lingered on her skin.

Suddenly, without warning, Nahuel swept her up into his arms and tossed her into the waterfall like she weighed nothing.

Sputtering and indignant, she surfaced to the sound of his laughter, determined to return the favor if it was the last thing she did.

* * *

Alice took her phone out onto the wide balcony that overlooked the river, but once she was outside in the sunshine, she had no idea who to call or what to say to them.

With her thumb, she scrolled through her list of contacts until she landed on one name. After a moment, she hit the call icon.

A couple thousand miles to the north, Esme glanced up from a book of fabric samples as her phone came to life.

Not too long after she married Edward, Bella had taught Esme all about ringtones and how she could download a different one for each of her family members, thereby knowing exactly who was calling her without even looking.

The phone now played Ella Fitzgerald's "Dream a Little Dream of Me." It was the song that had been playing on the radio when Alice and Jasper had first knocked on their door and invited themselves into her heart.

Removing the pencil she had between her teeth, Esme reached for the phone. "Alice, is everything all right?" she answered with a touch of anxiety.

In Brazil, Alice sighed and shook her head. "I don't know, Esme. I think I just had the first fight any of us has ever had with Nessie. Oh, sorry, Renesmee. That's what she wants to be called now, by the way."

"She's growing up," Esme mused. "But it's not in her nature to be argumentative."

"I think it was mostly my fault." Alice chewed her thumbnail for a second. "I was the one who suggested we come down here and I knew we might see Nahuel again, but I never expected her to...take to him so fast."

Esme turned her head as Carlisle entered her studio. As Alice recounted her fight with Nessie, Esme lowered the phone from her ear and put the device on speaker.

Alice's voice filled the room. "And then she just ran out of here like she couldn't wait to get away from her mean, old, stuffy aunt." She hesitated, like she was wringing her hands in worry. "Am I stuffy, Esme?"

"Darling, we're all the product of a very stuffy era," Esme replied dryly. Taking a seat, Carlisle put his fist to his mouth to hide his smile. "We just need to remember that Nessie...Renesmee...has a strong sense of self-respect and responsibility. We have to trust her, especially now that we can't watch her every second of every day."

"I just wish you could see the way he looks at her," Alice sighed. "It bothers me."

"Nahuel has gone longer without a companion than Edward did before he met Bella. It's understandable that he would latch onto the only other being in the world who is like him, but not related to him."

Alice was quiet for another second. "But what about Jacob?"

Esme and Carlisle exchanged a look. "I don't know," Esme finally said. "We know so little about imprinting."

"I haven't seen Jasper in nearly two weeks and I feel like half of my heart is missing," Alice whispered. "If imprinting is anything like what we feel for our mates, Jacob has suffered enough for one night's mistake."

"I agree," Esme murmured. "But what can we do?"

"Nothing," Alice said with a sigh of defeat. "I can't see any of them, what's ahead for them."

"And that must be frustrating." Esme took the hand that her husband held out to her. "Whatever happens, Nessie is going to need someone she can rely on for unconditional support. Right now, that's you, Alice." She squeezed Carlisle's fingers. "Welcome to parenthood."

For a few minutes after the call ended, Esme and Carlisle sat in silence, simply holding each one another's hand. Eventually, their eyes met and through unspoken agreement, Carlisle got up and walked down the hallway to the last door on the left.

He knocked and Jasper answered. "Yes?"

"How would you feel about coming down with a sudden case of mono?" Carlisle asked his son. "You could recuperate in Brazil."

* * *

After an hour, Nessie gave up on trying to dunk Nahuel under the water. He was too quick and too strong, even for her.

Not to mention that touching him, grabbing him, wrestling with him was starting to feel like less of a game and more of a prelude to something else entirely.

He followed her back to the shore and dug into his bag for his towel. He spread it out on the ground and flopped onto his back.

Nessie thought about putting her shirt back on, but the sun felt so wonderful on her glowing skin. She lay back on her own towel and closed her eyes.

"Renesmee?"

She turned her head towards him, but kept her eyes shut. "Yeah?"

"Have you ever been kissed?"

_The surpising softness of Jacob's lips. The heat of his tongue against hers. The feeling that the world could disappear as long as Jacob kept kissing her..._

Her lashes slowly lifted. He wasn't watching her as he waited for an answer, so she took a moment to reply. "Yes."

Nahuel rolled onto his side. Beads of water still clung to his dark skin. With his head propped on his elbow, he offered her a rueful smile. "What a very lucky man."

Nessie looked back up at the trees. "He didn't think so."

"Then I take it back. He is a very foolish man."

She shook her head slowly. "No. He's not. He's..." Nessie stopped. How could she possibly explain Jacob or put into words exactly what he meant to her? "Do we have to talk about him?" she whispered, tears welling up in her eyes.

Nahuel's expression turned dark. "Did this man hurt you?"

"It's...complicated." She shivered although she wasn't cold. "I just don't...I can't think about him right now."

His face relaxed. "Well, then you have come to the right part of the world for forgetting your troubles." He sat up suddenly, as if struck with a thought. "And at the right time of the year."

Nessie wiped at her cheeks. "Okay...what does that mean?"

But Nahuel wasn't ready to share his idea. He just seized her hand and pulled her to her feet. "It means, my Renesmee..." He was so close to her that she could feel his breath against her lips. His smile was irresistible; she couldn't look away.

Not that she tried very hard to.

"You haven't seen anything yet..."

* * *

To Be Continued


	13. Chapter 13

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: I really want to thank everyone for all of their reviews, the good and the bad, but I also want to thank Alessandra1 for reminding me not to doubt myself:) I long for Jacob and Nessie to reunite, too, but the story is what it is and I have no intention of rushing it. Sorry, but I hope you stick around for the rest of the journey:)

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

"Carnival?" Bella repeated the word like it tasted bad in her mouth. "Nahuel wants to take my daughter to the biggest, wildest party on the planet...and you didn't get rid of him immediately, Alice?"

"There's no need for melodrama." Alice sighed into her phone. "Besides, he's just about as indestructible as we are, remember?"

"She can't go."

"Bella..."

"I'm serious," Bella cut her off. "Shopping in London and Paris with Rosalie and visiting the rainforest with you is one thing, but flying off to Rio with a man who's a century and a half older than her is way too much adventure for a teenager!"

Alice nodded. "I agree, but she has her heart set on it."

"Well, she can just un-set it, then."

A moment passed. "She's your daughter and I would never go against yours or Edward's wishes in regards to her, but if I can offer my opinion as someone who's seen her over the past couple of days?" She took her time piecing together the right words. "If you forbid her from going, you might lose her forever."

"Now who's being melodramatic?" Alice could almost see Bella scowling. "She's my child, Alice. She might be mad for awhile, but she will get over it."

"That's just it, though. Is she a child? Or is she a teenager? We can't even seem to decide, so no wonder Jacob was so confused!" Alice gave her sister a second to process this. "What I do know is that we shouldn't treat her like a little girl."

"So...what? We should treat her like an adult? Throw her out into the world without any guidance?"

Alice switched her phone to her other ear. "I'll be with her in Rio, Bella. Jasper, too. If I call him right now, he can easily change his flight to meet us there instead of here. We won't let anything happen to her."

"I know that. I do. But, Alice..." Bella might not have had the ability to cry anymore, but her voice could still break with emotion. "I'm supposed to be the one guiding her through all of this. I went through so much when I was still human and my mother never knew about any of it. I don't want Nessie to feel like I'm some distant part of her life."

"She doesn't," Alice promised. Another second ticked by. "Why don't you and Edward end whatever silly spat you're having and fly down here together?"

"Maybe we should." Bella sniffed. "At the very least he should see first-hand what happens when he tries playing matchmaker for our daughter."

Alice walked to the closed sliding glass door that led onto the balcony. Outside, Kachiri and Senna were getting Nessie ready for Carnival by teaching her how to samba. It wasn't going all that well; she had apparently inherited her dancing skills from her mother. Still, Nessie was glowing with happiness and anticipation.

Nahuel stood off to the side watching Nessie's every stumbled step and awkward movement like she was the greatest dancer he'd ever seen.

"I have to go," Bella suddenly said, bringing Alice back to attention. "Call Jasper. Give Nessie my love. Have fun in Rio."

Her voice, like her words, was short and tense, but when Alice quickly scanned her sister's future, she saw nothing. It didn't alarm her too much, as it would have in the early days. Bella had simply put up her shield.

Something was going on that she didn't want Alice seeing.

"Bella..." But she was already gone.

With her phone still in her hand, Alice slid the door open, plastered a smile onto her face and stepped out into the humid night air.

"Guess what, everyone? I've got good news..."

* * *

"At the very least he should see first-hand what happens when he tries playing matchmaker for our daughter."

If not for the knock on the front door of Charlie's house, Bella would have gone on with a few choice phrases about her husband, but she never had the chance to vocalize them.

When she reached the door in the blink of an eye, Jacob Black was standing on the stoop.

"I have to go." To his credit, Jacob didn't run, even though he was obviously floored to see her in Forks. "Call Jasper," Bella told her sister, her eyes never leaving his. "Give Nessie my love." Jacob's mouth twitched. "Have fun in Rio."

"Rio?" he said when she lowered the phone from her ear. Jacob swallowed heavily. "She's in Brazil?"

Bella inclined her chin a fraction of an inch. "With Alice." She looked him up and down. "You've lost weight." He lifted his shoulder as if to indicate how much he cared about that fact. "Color, too."

"You should talk, pale face," he snorted.

"I have an excuse." Bella folded her arms. "What's yours?"

"Nothing you should worry about." Jacob took a step backwards. "I'll get out of your hair."

"Jake, stop. Seriously..." She sought out his eyes. "Don't you think we should talk?"

He snorted again. "Depends on if you define talking as ripping my throat out."

"I don't," she told him. "I'm not Rosalie." A cold wind rushed by, making the long strands of her hair dance around her shoulders. "Come inside. Please?"

Jacob hesitated. "I shouldn't."

"Why not? You came here for a reason, didn't you?"

"Yeah, but I didn't know you'd be..." He stopped.

"Why did you come then?" Bella frowned when he looked away. "To see Charlie?"

The expression on his face was twisted with agony. "No."

"Sue?"

Backing up again, he just kept shaking his head back and forth. "It doesn't matter. Just...forget I was here."

She managed to get a few feet out of the house before realization struck her like a bolt of lightning. "You're looking for Leah." She closed her eyes briefly. "Are you still seeing her?"

"No!" He emphasized this with wild gestures. "No way. It's just...she took off and I thought...Seth is worried about her and he asked me to..." Jacob stopped, his shoulders slumped. "Shit. Everything's a mess, Bella. I fucked everything up." His eyes were red with tears he refused to let her see. "And I..." He spread his muscled arms helplessly. "I don't know how to fix any of it."

"Oh, Jake," she whispered. "Please come inside."

His Adam's apple bobbed above the neckline of his fitted T-shirt. "What for? I don't expect you to forgive me. How could you? You're Nessie's mother!"

"I'm also your friend," Bella reminded him. "And you're mine." She tried to smile. "After everything we've gone through, I think we're pretty much stuck with each other."

"No," he disagreed. "Some things are unforgiveable, Bella."

"That's true. Some things are. But making a mistake, having a moment of imperfection...being human..." She shook her head. "Not one of them."

Jacob stared at her. "Are you on some kind of vampire happy pill?"

Her laughter cut through the wind. "If there was such a thing, I'd be giving my dose to my husband."

Mentioning Edward put the agony back on Jacob's face. "You should take a page out of his book. He's got the right idea about me."

"Edward never thinks he has the wrong idea about anything," Bella replied. "But he's changed his mind about you before, Jake, like you've changed your mind about him."

"Maybe it's different when it's his daughter and not his girlfriend that I'm messing with."

Bella jerked her head towards the door. "Please. Let's talk." She paused. "For Nessie's sake."

He swallowed. "I miss her so much, Bella."

As he passed by her on the way into the house, she slipped her arm through his and squeezed gently as they walked up the steps together. "Join the club."

* * *

Jasper had never liked flying. Unlike the rest of his family who had all immediately taken to commercial flight when it came about in the 60's, Jasper just found something disturbing about hurtling through the upper atmosphere at six hundred miles per hour in what basically amounted to a metal cylinder, even if he would be the only survivor if something were to go horribly wrong.

But, then, he'd never been flying to Alice before. Somehow knowing that in only a couple of hours he would be with his wife again made the flight to Rio almost bearable, in spite of the half-dressed, middle-aged woman in the seat next to him who seemed determined to rub as much of her leg against his as possible.

He doubted anyone else in first class would have agreed, but it was a good thing she'd doused herself in a very potent perfume. Made her much less tempting to the vampire she had decided to seduce.

Jasper was the first one off the plane when they landed. He shot through customs and made his way to the baggage claim area, where Alice and Nessie were waiting for him.

If he had needed to breathe, he would have been doing so much easier right then. The missing half of his heart was back in place.

Nessie glanced away when Jasper wrapped his arms around Alice and lifted her off the ground. It didn't seem right to intrude on their reunion. She suddenly wished Nahuel hadn't gone off to arrange a rental car.

Finally, Jasper set Alice back down again, but kept her close, as if he was afraid she was an illusion. Her aunt wasn't complaining. She fit against her husband's side like they were made for each other.

"Hi, Uncle Jazz," Nessie said with a spunky wave.

He stepped away from Alice just long enough to give her a hug and to kiss the top of her head. "You've been very missed, Renesmee."

She smiled at his use of her real name. "Really?"

Jasper reached into the inside pocket of his corded jacket. "Don't believe me?" He handed a cream-colored envelope to his niece. "Here."

Nessie took it hesitantly. Her name was on the front, in handwriting she recognized immediately. Her father's script spoke of another time, when men still wrote letters. She looked up at her aunt who was watching her carefully. "Thanks." After tucking the letter into her shoulder bag, she put her smile back on. "Can you believe that Aunt Alice managed to get three rooms at a five-star hotel the day before Carnival starts?"

"Alice is a miracle worker, always has been," Jasper told her. He glanced down at his wife. "Three rooms?"

She nodded with a forced smile of her own. "Us, her and..."

"Nahuel!" Upon spotting him across the baggage carousels, Nessie waved her arm high above her head to catch his attention. "Over here!"

As they waited for him to wade through the crowd, Jasper lowered his lips to Alice's ear. "Should I be worried?"

"I don't know," she told him under her breath. "Read him when you can?"

"Do you even need to ask, darlin'?"

Upon reaching them, Nahuel held out a set of car keys with pride. "I hope you do not mind, but I was forced to rent a Mercedes. It was all they had left." He lit up at seeing the new arrival. "Jasper, old friend!" He seized his scarred hand and shook it firmly. "Welcome to Brazil!" Nahuel winked at Nessie. "And welcome, all of you, to _Carnaval_!"

* * *

To Be Continued


	14. Chapter 14

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: I just want to make sure you know how much I appreciate every single review and every single hit. I picked this story up again based on one review, but I've kept going because of all the ones that have followed. You inspire me:) Thank you.

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

As Nahuel guided the car through the crowded streets towards their hotel, Nessie's eyes were drawn to _Cristo Redentor_, the impressive statue of Jesus that watched over the city of Rio de Janeiro, arms spread in welcome and blessing.

And if even part of what Nahuel claimed went on at Carnival was true, the citizens and tourists in Rio would need all the blessings they could get before the end of the week.

"I have gotten us into a private box at the _Sambadrome _tonight," Nahuel told them. "That is the only way to watch the parades."

In the backseat, Alice frowned. "I was told the private boxes have been sold out for months."

Nessie glanced at Nahuel in time to see him wink. "It is all about who you know, yes?"

"Do you always come to Carnival?" Nessie asked.

"Only in recent years have we in Chile begun to have _Carnaval_, so before that, if I wanted to celebrate, I had to come here." Nahuel turned off the main street at the entrance to the Copacabana Palace. "But I will tell you one thing," he added as he pulled the car up under the shade of the valet attendant's awning. "I have never looked forward to it like this before."

When Nahuel and Jasper got out to unload the luggage, Nessie turned around in her seat to look back at her aunt. "Isn't this amazing?" she gushed. "The beach...the mountains...everything is just gorgeous!"

"Everything?" Alice reached through the front seats to grasp Nessie's hand. "Honey, when we get settled in our rooms, I think you and I should have a talk."

"We had a talk," Nessie reminded her with a hint of exasperation. "You thought Nahuel was taking me on that jungle hike in order to seduce me, remember?"

"I don't think I ever said that exactly."

"But you were wrong, Aunt Alice. It was so far from what you were thinking! I swear, he treated me like Uncle Emmett would have. He even threw me into the waterfall!"

Alice arched an eyebrow at the idea of Nahuel handling Nessie like that, especially when she knew exactly how little her niece would have been wearing at the time. "Nessie..."

"Renesmee!" Nessie shook her head in frustration. "I really wish I could have a word with whoever came up with that nickname."

"Actually, it was Jacob," Alice replied coolly. Although it bothered her to see the sudden flash of hurt across the girl's face, she added, "And I would love it if you had a word with him. I think it's long overdue."

"It's really hard to have a word with someone whose phone number's been disconnected." Nessie hid her eyes behind her Chanel sunglasses and threw her door open. "I'm going to help with the bags."

Alone in the car, Alice chose to forget, just for a moment, that ladies weren't supposed to curse, even when it was warranted.

* * *

As she waited for the call she had just placed to be answered, Bella tapped her manicured fingernail against the polished wood surface of her father's kitchen table. She glanced out the window at the darkness; there was no sign of the sun yet.

She and Jacob hadn't talked all night, but they'd only missed doing so by an hour or two.

Finally, she heard her husband on the other end. "Hello, Bella."

It had been so many years since she'd first heard Edward's voice. They had been through everything since then...battles, a wedding, losing their virginity, childbirth, death, immortality...how could it be that she still felt like a seventeen year-old girl whenever he said her name?

She'd let too much time pass without replying and it clearly concerned Edward. "Bella? Are you there? Are you all right?"

"I'm fine," she promised. Several long moments passed. "Did Alice call you?"

"Yes." Bella frowned at the wood pattern in the table top until he went on, "I told her I didn't want Nessie to go to Rio, but that I would leave it up to you."

Her chin shot up. "Wait. I thought you..."

"Were thrilled about Nahuel sweeping our daughter off to Carnival?" Edward supplied. "Hardly, Bella."

"You've done a pretty good imitation of just that up until now," she informed him.

She could hear music in the background and immediately recognized it as a recording of the lullaby he'd written for Nessie on her first chronological birthday. "It's amazing how clearly one can think in a nearly-empty house. Without as many voices to filter out, I've actually been able to listen to myself."

"And what did you figure out?" Bella asked.

Edward hesitated before he answered. "Seven years ago, when I first realized how Jacob felt about Nessie, I hated it. I hated him for it, even though I knew it wasn't anything he could control. But there wasn't anything I could do except trust that he, unlike any of the other men in the world who might fall in love with her, would never, ever cause her pain." His tone turned hard. "I trusted him with my child's heart and he betrayed that trust. And I suppose," he grudgingly went on, "for a minute I thought that he deserved a taste of his own medicine in the form of Nahuel."

"Oh, Edward, if you could just see him, not even hear his thoughts, but just see what's happened to him, you would know that he has punished himself far beyond what even you think he deserves."

"The fact that he did it at all..." Edward gave himself ten seconds to calm down. "How can I ever be sure that it won't happen again?"

"I don't think it matters if we're ever sure about that," Bella said. "And it is us I'm talking about, because I trusted him, too, remember?" She paused. "But the only person who has to forgive him is Nessie. The rest of us...we just have to trust her judgement."

Edward let out a lungful of air that he'd been unnecessarily storing up. "She's too young to be able to figure that out, Bella."

"No," Bella said sadly. "We want her to still be that young, because we don't want to lose her. But she's not a child anymore, Edward. Yes, she still has a lot to learn, so she still needs us, but when it comes to Jacob...she's as ready for him as I was for you."

"You and I were different," he tried to protest.

"Sure, we were," she agreed. "You were a hell of a lot older than Jacob is and I was so much stupider than Nessie ever has been."

She could feel him smiling reluctantly. "You were never stupid."

"We can debate that another time. Right now, I have a clinically depressed werewolf passed out on my father's couch and I have no idea how to help him."

"Is he really that bad off?"

Bella got up and walked to the living room. Lost in a nightmare, Jacob's pale face was scrunched up in agony. "Edward, he's worse than I was when you left me. For once, I'm not trying to make you feel bad about that. I'm just being honest." She sighed. "He's going through hell."

"It's a hell he created," Edward couldn't help but point out. "And, yes, I would know." A second passed. "But what I did...it was to protect you."

"Well, you know what they say about good intentions."

Edward chuckled in spite of himself. "Oh, you have no idea how much I miss you."

"Yeah, I do." She tore her eyes away from Jacob and made her way back into the kitchen. "I was going to stick around for a few days, but if you want..."

"Come home. Please come home, Bella."

If she'd had a heartbeat, it would have skipped several times. "I'll be there before sun down."

* * *

Lying in Jasper's arms after a quick, but thoroughly satisfying reunion, Alice had a hard time remembering why she'd been so troubled earlier. Her husband was trailing his fingers up and down her spine and his scarred chest was so warm against her cheek...nothing else seemed to matter when she felt so content.

But the good feeling didn't last long.

"He's infatuated with her." Jasper broke the silence without warning. When Alice tilted her head back, she saw him staring up at the ceiling with a worried frown marring his otherwise perfect face. "Nahuel. Every time he looks at Nessie, all I feel is..."

"Love?" she whispered.

Jasper shook his head slowly against the pillow. "I don't know. It's hard to tell the difference between the two. Infatuation can seem so much like love that it can even fool the person who's feeling it." He paused. "He probably thinks he is in love with her."

"I tried to tell her." Alice closed her eyes for a second. "This is why it's so hard not to treat her like a child, Jazz. She just doesn't have enough experience to recognize the obvious!"

"Well, is it such a bad thing?" Jasper glanced down at his wife. "Him being in love with her?"

Alice blinked. "I thought you liked Jacob."

"I do," Jasper assured her. "I'm on his team. Or whatever team you're on. But how is Nessie ever gonna get this so-called experience if she only ever has the attention of one guy?" He urged her up for a kiss. "If you want my opinion..."

"Always." She twisted a honeyed curl of his hair around her finger. "You know that."

He kissed her again, deeper this time. "Let her figure what she wants, like any other teenager in the world. It's the only way she'll ever really grow up."

Alice gently yanked his curl. "When did you get so smart?"

"Since you asked, ma'am," he drawled, "1949, when I decided to wait out the rain in that diner."

Several hours, and several more "reunions" later, Jasper and Alice knocked on the door to the adjoining suite. Nessie answered within seconds. Immediately upon seeing her aunt, she stepped back in order to give Alice an unobstructed view of the outfit she'd put together.

"How do I look?" she asked.

There weren't really words. Nessie was the best of both her parents and that was saying something. Her bronze hair was pinned back on either side of her face, but still tumbled around her shoulders in perfect curls. Her brown eyes sparkled with excitement and her flawless skin glowed even though they were indoors.

She wore a vintage Diane von Furstenberg sundress, striped in every shade of blue. The spaghetti straps tied at her shoulders and the full skirt swung just above her knee. Alice recognized the Manolo Blahnik strappy sandals on her feet; she'd picked them out for her niece in France.

The only jewelry she wore was a load of bangle bracelets on her wrist and the locket that Bella had given her shortly after her birth.

Alice held out her arms for a hug. Nessie happily obliged; it was like the scene in the car had never happened. She laughed as she embraced her niece with no small amount of pride.

"Have I ever told you how glad I am that you got your fashion sense from me?"

But once again...Alice's good mood didn't last long.

When they stepped off the elevator and into the lobby, Nahuel was waiting for them, wearing a pair of tailored black pants and a fitted blue shirt that had one too many buttons undone. His eyes locked onto Nessie like she was the only woman in the entire city.

Alice felt Jasper squeeze her hand tighter, but it wasn't enough to drive away the butterflies in her stomach. She was blind to the future where Nessie and Nahuel and Jacob were concerned, but it didn't take a clairvoyant mind to realize that something was stirring in the sultry South American air.

She just prayed that her husband was right...and that Nessie would be able to handle whatever happened next.

* * *

To Be Continued


	15. Chapter 15

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: I am so glad that most of you seem to be really enjoying the story and the way I'm telling it, but if you're not, then I am sorry. But whether you are or aren't, thank you for bothering to read it at all:)

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

Built expressly for Carnival, the _Sambadrome_ was basically a permanent parade stadium that ran for half a mile and could seat up to 90,000 people in various levels of comfort. And from the sound of things as Nahuel led Nessie, Alice and Jasper to the seats he had reserved for them, both sides of the structure were likely filled to capacity.

Their box was private in that it was enclosed on all sides, save for the front which lay open to the parade route, allowing in the sounds and the sights, but it wasn't exclusively theirs for the night. A couple of dozen other tourists had already gathered in the box and were taking full advantage of the stocked bar and buffet that had been provided.

They nodded at the newcomers politely, but fortunately took no more note of them. Weaving her way through the small crowd, Nessie ran to the stone railing.

"Oh!" she cried out in delight as she looked up and down the packed bleachers that surrounded them. "I think everyone in Rio must be here!"

Nahuel chucked as he joined her. "Not quite. There are many other parties happening tonight, in the hotels, on the streets. This is just the biggest one."

Nessie looked back at her aunt and uncle. "You've got to come see this! I've never seen so many people in one place in my entire life!"

Jasper, who hadn't drawn breath since they'd gotten out of the car, gave Alice a pained look. She squeezed his hand and told him in a voice so high and musical that only he could hear it, "You're going to be fine. I promise."

With his wife's assurance that the overwhelming scent of nearly a hundred thousand humans wouldn't set him off, Jasper reluctantly followed her to the viewing area.

"It is something," he conceded a minute later. But he still hadn't taken a breath, not even for show.

"There's so much color!" Alice's topaz eyes sparkled. "Oh, Esme would love this! She and Carlisle have to come here next year."

"You must all come," Nahuel declared. "Your entire family." He looked at Nessie. "You will tell them?"

Under the spell of _Carnaval_, she nodded eagerly. "Of course! Right, Aunt Alice?"

After exchanging a look with her husband, Alice opened her mouth to reply, but she was interrupted before she even began by a booming voice through the stadium's speakers.

Nahuel translated for them. "Ladies and gentlemen, welcome! Let our celebration begin!"

Suddenly, they were surrounded by the other guests in the box as everyone fought for the best view of the first dancers and floats.

Nessie didn't know where to look. There was simply too much going on and all of it was terribly exciting. Hundreds of dancers in elaborate costumes, block-long floats that stood so tall that she could nearly reach out and touch the crepe paper, confetti and streamers floating through the air. Light, color, sound...bare skin, painted flesh, wide smiles, feathers in rainbows, fire in circles.

It was impossible to keep still as the parade went on and the decorations of the samba schools participating became more outrageous. The music was infectious; once it was in her blood, she wanted to move, but she didn't realize she actually was until she felt a hand on her hip. Nahuel stepped up behind her, surrounding her with the scent of his cologne. Every few seconds, her back would brush against his front and his fingers would grip her tighter.

Heat rushed to her cheeks. Nessie glanced to her right. Several people had wedged themselves between her and her aunt. Alice and Jasper didn't seem to notice this fact. Alice was too enraptured with the spectacle and Jasper was concentrating too hard on not inhaling.

"You want to dance." Nessie wasn't sure if it was a question or a statement, but the fact that Nahuel murmured it directly into her ear made her whole body shiver.

She ran her tongue over her lower lip until she found her voice. "Can we just go down and join in?"

"Not here." His hand moved up to cup her slender waist. "But there are places we can."

Nessie drew in a slow breath. "We can't just leave...my aunt will freak out."

"I will get you back before it ends." Nahuel threaded the fingers of his free hand through hers and brought them up over her shoulder to meet his lips. "Do you trust me, my Renesmee?"

Alice might never forgive her, but she found herself nodding. A few minutes later, when the music swelled and the crowd roared in appreciation of the next school entering the parade route, Nessie and Nahuel quietly, silently slipped out the back.

* * *

Jacob woke with the feeling that someone was watching him. When he opened his eyes, it wasn't Sam or Emily or Brianna hovering over him. It was Bella.

"Hey, Sleeping Beauty." She smiled and, like always, he chose to ignore how unnaturally sharp her teeth looked. "I was about to stick your hand in warm water."

"Thanks for restraining yourself," he muttered as he dragged himself upright on Charlie's couch. "How long was I out?"

"Hours. You needed it."

There was no point in denying this fact, so Jacob just ran his hands down his face. As he did, something in the far corner of the room caught his eye. Bella's Louis Vuitton luggage.

"You're leaving?" Bella inclined her chin and Jacob fought back a lump in his throat. "Well, thanks for listening to all my crap." He kicked off the blanket she must have placed over him while he slept and stood up. "Think Charlie would mind if I stole some coffee?"

Bella followed him into the kitchen. "Jake, we talked about pretty much everything last night...except about what happened with Leah."

"There's a reason for that." He filled the pot with water and poured it into the machine. "I don't want to talk about it."

She watched him measure out heaping tablespoons of coffee grounds into the paper filter; it was enough caffeiene to stop the heart of a normal person. "I think we should."

"Do you?" Jacob slammed the filter into the machine and flipped the switch with way more force than necessary. "Want to hear all the gory details, Bella?"

"You know I don't." She folded her arms. "It was your first time, wasn't it?" He didn't turn around, but after a few seconds, he nodded. "I'm so sorry, Jake."

Jacob turned on her. "You're sorry? What the hell did you have to do with it?"

Her eyes widened then narrowed. "Why are you jumping on me?"

"Why are you making me..." He plunged his fingers into his unkempt hair. "...remember?" With a growl, he pushed away from the counter and stalked back into the living room. Adding fuel to his fire, she followed him again. "Leave me alone, Bella!"

She folded her arms calmly. "No."

"Where the hell is Charlie?" Jacob shouted, as if the man would materialize and rescue him.

"Out with Sue." Bella took a step towards him. "Help me understand. How did you even end up in a situation like that with Leah?"

"Did it ever cross your immortal mind that it might just be none of your damn business?" he hissed.

Bella stared at him without blinking. "You were drinking. She was with you. One thing led to another...it happens, Jake."

"Does it? Thanks. I feel tons better."

"I should be the one yelling at you," Bella reminded him. "You told me once that Nessie was the other half of your heart."

"That's never changed," he snapped. A second later, his tone softened. "It won't ever change."

"So, Leah...?"

"Do you want to hear me say that it was a mistake?" He lifted his muscular shoulders. "Already did that. Right to her face when we were both still naked. Would you like to hear about how much that crushed her? And we're talking about someone who's already lost the love of her life to her cousin, so she's got a pretty high pain threshold."

Bella lowered her eyes. "Sometimes I forget what she's been through."

"We all forget it. We just say 'Leah's a bitch' and then use her for whatever we need right then. I sure did. I wanted to stop thinking about Nessie, so I took what Leah offered. And when it was over, the only thing I could think about was Nessie." He laughed bitterly. "Great plan, right?"

"Jake..."

"I hurt Nessie. I hurt Leah. I hurt you and Edward...everyone...and do you know what the worst part is, Bella?" His eyes burned with unshed tears. "I couldn't even give Leah the one thing in the world that she wants."

Glancing away, Bella murmured, "A child?"

He nodded. "I might have lost Nessie and all of you forever, but at the least...at the very, very least...something good could have come out of all of this." He paused. "But it didn't happen. Lucky for me, right?"

The scent of coffee filled the air, but Jacob made no motion to go pour himself a cup. He just grasped the back of Charlie's couch and let his chin drop down to his chest, the very picture of man tortured with guilt.

After a long time, Bella dared to approach him. "Jake." He ignored her, so she laid her hand on his back. "You have to stop punishing yourself."

"Yeah." His voice was muffled. "I'll get right on that."

"I'm serious." With all the immeasurable strength in her much-smaller body, she grabbed his shoulders and physically forced him to look at her. "What will it take?"

But he didn't need to say anything because she already knew the answer. Nothing had truly fixed her shattered world after Edward left until she saw him in Volterra. Just one look, one touch and the pieces had come together like magic.

And in that moment, she knew exactly what she needed to do.

"Go to Sam's and get your stuff," Bella told Jacob. "This ends now."

* * *

About half a mile from the _Sambadrome_, Nahuel and Nessie came across a street party. Although it was far less grand than what they had just come from, it was no less colorful or full of life. The music that filled the air was courtesy of a small band of sweaty, but smiling perfomers. Paper lanterns hung above the crowd, strong from window to window across the street. There was barely any unoccupied space; everyone was dancing and eating, drinking and laughing.

Nessie gripped Nahuel's hand as they wove through the revelers. "Aren't we crashing?" she shouted to be heard over the happy noise.

"This is a party for everyone!" he declared. They reached a table that was practically groaning under the weight of heavy platters of food and cases of beer. Nahuel grabbed two bottles, popped the lids off and handed one to Nessie.

He raised his drink. "To _Carnaval_!"

Nessie had never had so much as a sip of alcohol in her entire life. No one in her family drank anything but blood. As such, none of them had ever thought to give her any instruction on the topic. So she felt no guilt as she lifted the bottle to her lips

The beer was bitter, but it warmed her empty stomach. She took another sip, glancing away when she noticed Nahuel watching her.

Someone bumped into her just then, sending her stumbling forward. Beer splashed onto Nahuel's shirt as he caught her, but he just asked, "Are you okay?"

Her head felt light. Could that happen after only two sips of beer? "I'm fine." She searched for something to say, anything to keep her mind off the fact that he wasn't letting go of her. "Sorry about your shirt."

Nahuel smiled down at her. "Do you think I care about my shirt when you are in my arms?"

Nessie swallowed. "I think I want to dance," she said just a touch too abruptly.

He took the bottle out of her hand and set it down along with his. "Then we will dance."

She might not have been much good at the samba on the balcony of Zafrina's house, but in the middle of a crowded street under the starry skies of Rio, Nessie moved as if she had been dancing for years. In truth, though, Nahuel was a natural and under his guidance, any woman would have found her inner dancer.

The music was fast, but sensuous. Intoxicating. When Nahuel guided her arms around his neck, she let him, even though it meant that there was suddenly no space between them. And with the crowd all around, pushing at them from all sides, she could feel every muscle in his legs and every beat of his heart.

As they danced, Nahuel sang along with the song in smooth Portuguese. His voice was untrained, but deep and perfectly husky. When he drew her closer, Nessie rested her cheek on his sleeve and closed her eyes for a brief moment.

Her lashes lifted and as she looked at the faces all around them...she saw Jacob.

Nessie pushed away from Nahuel. "Jacob?" The face in the crowd turned away. "Jake!" she shouted again. But the dark head of hair was walking away.

Nahuel frowned. "Renesmee? What is it?"

"I saw...he was just..." Her chest rose and fell. "He's here!" She slipped out of Nahuel's grip. "I have to..." Without finishing the thought, Nessie took off.

She could hear Nahuel calling her name as she pushed her way through the dancers, but she never slowed down. She didn't even blink lest she lose sight of him.

Being small and fast, it only took a few minutes for Nessie to catch up with him. No doubt in her mind...it was Jacob. Same hair, same build, same height. Her heart was beating so fast she was afraid it might just shut down before she could reach him.

Finally, he stopped and she grabbed his arm. "Jake!"

But when he turned around, a stranger looked down at her in annoyance. Maybe there was some similarity around the eyes, but it wasn't Jacob. It never had been.

Her heart, which had felt so full a second ago, deflated like a balloon. There was a buzzing sound in her ears that drowned out the music entirely.

"_Sinto muito_." She heard Nahuel apologize to the man and wondered when he'd reached them. He added something else and whatever it was, it must have been the right thing to say because the man just nodded and continued on his way.

When he was gone, Nahuel gently took her hands in his. "Renesmee? Are you all right?"

"No." Nessie shook her head back and forth as dry sobs welled up in her chest. "No, I'm not. I thought it was...but it wasn't..."

Everything she had been repressing for the past month came flooding back to her, like a tidal wave of unwanted emotion. Anger and grief and loneliness mixed in with the tiniest amount of guilt...it was too much. And she had nothing else to grab onto but Nahuel.

She had no idea he might take it as an invitation.

Nahuel cupped her face in his hands and he pressed his lips to hers. Nessie's eyes flew open as he kissed her. His mouth was hot, but demanding. Nothing like what she was used to.

"Renesmee," he murmured, breaking the kiss. He stroked her cheeks like she was the softest thing he had ever touched. "My Renesmee."

Stunned, she found that she couldn't move. "I don't understand..."

"Don't you?" Nahuel kissed her again, seeming to not notice that she wasn't kissing him back. "Can you not see it when I look at you?" His smile was like a secret. "You are the one for me, Renesmee. The only woman in the world for me."

A shadow crossed his face when she wrenched away from him and took a step back. "Renesmee?" Shaking her head, she turned so fast that the heel of her shoe broke off. It didn't slow her down. "Renesmee!"

Without any clue where she was going, Nessie began to run.

* * *

To Be Continued

For a look at Carnival, and a peek into what inspired me while I was writing this chapter, go to www. youtube. com/ watch?v=M5VUryKWkzo


	16. Chapter 16

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: Wow. I just have to say, I'm completely amazed that my very little story has invoked so much emotion in some readers. I choose to be flattered by this fact, and even though I know that I can't please everyone, I hope that you will stick with me to the end. I will do my best to make it worth your while. Thank you again, all of you, for such incredible, thoughtful reviews. Enjoy:)

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

Brianna clung to Jacob's leg like he was her only life preserver in a stormy sea. "No, no, Uncle Jake!" she sobbed. "Don't go!"

Jacob closed his eyes. Why was he always hurting the people he loved? He looked at Sam for help.

"Brianna." The little girl ignored her father and buried her face even deeper into Jacob's jeans. "Brianna, you have to be a big girl right now."

Her reply was muffled. "Don't wanna." When Sam began gently pulling her away from Jacob, she let out a shriek of protest and wrapped her skinny arms even tighter around his thigh. "No!"

Standing in the background, Bella couldn't help but remember a similar scene when Nessie was two and Jacob had to return to the reservation for his father's funeral. Only it had taken a lot more effort to pull her off of him, even back then. Sam was lucky that Brianna didn't have vampire strength running through her.

Having successfully separated his daughter from Jacob's leg, Sam lifted her up in his arms. Her cheeks were streaked with tears which he tried to wipe away with his free hand. "I know you're going to miss Jake," he told her. "We all are," he added, looking straight at Jacob. "But everyone has a path they have to take in their life. Right now, Jake's path is going to take him away from us for a little while. But I know that someday soon, we'll meet him again." He glanced at Jacob again. "That's how it is with family." Sam lifted his daughter's little chin. "No more tears?"

She sniffed theatrically and although she didn't have a verbal answer, the way she laid her cheek down on her father's shoulder was proof enough of her acceptance and agreement.

"Thanks, Sam. For everything."

Sam nodded as they shook hands.. "Our spirit goes with you, Jake."

When he looked at Emily, she merely held out her arms for a hug. "Thank you," he said into her ear as they embraced.

There were tears in her eyes when he pulled back. "This is your home whenever you need it," she told him.

After giving Sammy a baby fist bump in his carrier, Jacob had just one more person to wish farewell before he and Bella set off for Oregon.

"I'm going to miss you, Brianna-bear." Jacob brushed her black bangs aside and kissed her forehead. "Be nice to your brother, okay? No matter how stinky he gets."

"Uncle Jake!" Her head shot up and she twisted in her father's arms in order to see him better. "What about the end of the story!"

He blinked. "Oh. Yeah. Um...I don't really...know."

Brianna wasn't to be dissuaded. "Did the prince tell the princess he was sorry that he kissed the witch?"

Jacob could feel Bella's eyes on him. He swallowed heavily. "Not yet." For the first time in a very long time, the ghost of a smile appeared on his face. "But he will."

* * *

_Once, just after her fourth chronological birthday, Nessie got lost in the woods while hunting with Jacob. The scent of a fox distracted her and she'd run off when his back was turned. It wasn't until she caught up with the sleek animal and drank her fill that she noticed two things: she had no idea where she was and Jacob wasn't anywhere nearby. _

_It wasn't in her nature to be afraid, as there were very few things in the world that posed any threat to her, and she knew that if she tried to find her way back, she'd only end up deeper in the woods, so she found a comfortable log and sat down to wait for him. Jacob would find her soon. She was as sure of that as she was of her own name. _

_She only waited for forty-five minutes before Jacob burst through the foliage in his wolf form. With a look of relief in his animal eyes, he lowered himself down to the ground enough for her to climb onto his back for the ride home._

_"How did you find me?" Nessie asked him later that night when he tucked her into bed. "Was it my scent? Did I leave tracks?"_

_Smiling, Jacob shook his head. "Ness...I'll always be there when you need me." _

The streets and alleys of Rio were dark and mostly empty. Having lost one heel and having been forced to abandon the other shoe entirely when it slowed her down, Nessie ran on bare feet, oblivious to glass or puddles or garbage.

Even if Aunt Alice forgave her for disappearing at the _Sambadrome_, she certainly wouldn't ever forgive the loss of a brand new pair of Manolo Blahnik's.

Every now and then, she thought she heard Nahuel call her name, and each instance propelled her to run faster. There was too much going on in her mind for her to stop and think about what had just happened between them.

Nessie could smell the ocean before she saw it. Only a large, busy street stood between her and the beach. She didn't hesitate or wait for a break in the traffic; she just ran straight across. Horns honked, tires screeched, curses were hurtled her way, but she didn't care. A minute later, her feet touched the sand.

_She had resembled a fourteen year-old the first time she saw the ocean. They had been living in the deep woods for most of her life, but Jacob, who had grown up next to the sea, missed it so much that he convinced Bella and Edward to let him take Nessie to Neskowin Beach for the afternoon. _

_The coast of Oregon sufficed as a stand-in for La Push and it hadn't taken Nessie long to notice the effect that the salt-smell and roaring waves had on Jacob. He was...lighter, for lack of a better word, like a great weight had been lifted off his shoulders. The water was freezing, but they both waded and splashed in the waves, like the big brother and little sister everyone assumed they were. _

_When the sun went down, he built a fire in the sand and roasted the mussels that he'd collected from the tide pools. Nessie watched him, fascinated by his reaction to the beach. Personally, she wasn't terribly fond of the cold, wet sand, but she would have withstood any amount of discomfort to make Jacob happy. _

_That was the first day she realized that whenever he smiled, her cheeks felt hot. And when he broke open the black shells to get at the meat inside, his muscles rippled in a way she had never noticed before. By the time they returned to the house, Nessie's entire world had changed. Her best friend had become something more._

She had no idea how long she stood in the middle of the dark, empty stretch of Brazilian beach, just trying to collect her breath, but it wasn't long before Nahuel finally caught up to her.

"Renesmee!" She winced and refused to turn around. A strong wind blew past, making her long hair stream over her shoulder and her skirt dance around her legs. She closed her eyes and relished her last moment of peace before Nahuel grabbed her shoulders and spun her around.

He shouted at her in Spanish, and although she was learning the language in school, she only knew that he was angry. A second later, he hauled her against his chest. Like a rag doll, she let him. "I thought I would not find you! Your scent...I almost lost it several times." Pulling back, Nahuel held her at arm's length. "What were you thinking? Tell me!"

After staring at him for several seconds, Nessie lifted her hand and placed it on his cheek. When the images from her mind flooded into his, Nahuel closed his eyes.

She didn't consciously direct the memories she showed him; they just came to her in random patterns. Jacob smiling at her, Jacob kissing her in the woods, Jacob changing into a wolf and running away, Jacob sitting on her bed, Jacob's face as he told her about Leah, her father's anger, her mother's comforting arms, her aunts in London and Paris, and finally, seeing what she thought was Jacob in the crowded street.

When she was done, Nessie lowered her hand. "I'm sorry," she apologized.

"For what?" Nahuel opened his eyes. "What you have shown me...it is hardly your fault."

She shook her head. "I thought it was getting better, but right now...it feels like it happened yesterday." A sob tore through her slender frame; her shoulders bent under the weight of her grief. "How could he..." She stopped.

Nahuel took her cold hand and held it between his to warm it up. "Perhaps if you let it out, you would feel better."

Nessie kept shaking her head, but when her chest started to ache from the bottled up pressure inside, she just couldn't keep quiet anymore.

"How could he do it?" she shouted. The crash of the waves did nothing to drown her out, so she kept going. "I was supposed to be the one person in the world for him...and he threw that away to be with her?"

Jerking her hand away, Nessie balled up her fists. "I've loved him my entire life!" She took a couple of steps back, edging closer a row of closed cabana tents. "I would have done anything for him...waited however long he wanted! But..." Nessie's voice broke as tears spilled down her cheeks. "It wasn't me, I guess. Maybe...it wasn't supposed to be me. Maybe...maybe we're just...just supposed to be..." Her beautiful face crumpled. "...brother and sister."

Nahuel reached her in the blink of an eye and gathered her up in his arms again. High above, fireworks lit up the night sky in showers of brilliant reds and blinding whites. Underneath that fiery sky, Nahuel held her, rocked her, until her sobs ebbed away.

When she lifted her chin, Nessie only looked into his eyes for a second before she started kissing him.

* * *

The trip back to Oregon passed by in a blur. Before Jacob knew it, Bella was turning her BMW onto the long stretch of road that led through the woods to the Cullen's palatial house.

"Are you sure about this?" They were only seconds away from arriving, and it was far too late for the question, but he asked it anyway. "Bella, the last time I saw Edward, he wanted to kill me."

"I've wanted to kill you many times," she reminded him. "But you're still here." Having reached the house, Bella put the car in park and turned off the engine. "I can't say that he's not still angry with you, Jake, but if we're ever going to be a family again, you two have to at least be in the same place at the same time without blood or fur flying."

Jacob glanced down at his hands. "Family, huh?"

"It's the word of the day. Don't wear it out." Bella peered through the windshield as her husband opened the front door and stepped outside. Without another word, and with motions so fast that even Jacob didn't register them, Bella was out of the car and in Edward's arms.

Old habits compelled him to look away as they kissed. The cold feeling in his gut was jealousy, but it was different now. He wasn't envious of Edward for having Bella, but of Bella and Edward for having each other.

Their love was something he could have had with Nessie. Now, it was something he might never experience for the rest of his life.

Hand in hand, Edward and Bella walked back to the car. Edward knocked on the window, startling Jacob out of his thoughts. Reluctantly, Jacob cracked the door open.

"Hey," was all he could think to say.

Edward's eyes narrowed, but it might have been the glare of sudden dying sun beam that streamed through the clouds, turning him and Bella into diamonds for a brief moment before it was swallowed up by the darkening sky.

"Jacob," Edward finally said. "Come inside. Esme's cooking dinner for you."

He climbed out of the car warily. "She didn't have to do that."

Edward snorted. "Would you rather starve?"

Jacob folded his heavy arms. "Wouldn't that make you happy?"

"I don't wish you dead," Edward replied in a way that wasn't at all convincing.

"Just maimed?" Jacob guessed. "Maybe castrated?"

The vampire shrugged. "If that's what it takes to get you to keep your britches buttoned."

"Hey." Bella stepped in before things turned ugly. "I am so tired of having to get between the two of you! It was annoying back then, but it's downright ridiculous now." She glared at her husband, then at her best friend. "There should only be one side, Nessie's, and we should all be on it. Agreed?"

After a second, Edward inclined his chin, followed by a curt nod from Jacob.

"All right." Bella shook her dark hair back from her face, a move she had unconsciously picked up from Rosalie. "Let's go inside and..."

She was cut off by the sound of phone playing Aqua's "Barbie Girl." Frowning, Bella pulled it out of her coat pocket. "Alice?" she said without having to look at the screen. Her frown grew deeper. "Alice, slow down! I can't understand..." She trailed off. Her eyes grew wide as her sister's words hit her. "Oh my god..."

Edward and Jacob exchanged a look. "Bella?" Edward put his hand on his wife's arm. "What's going on?"

"It's Nessie," Bella whispered.

The hairs on the back of Jacob's neck bristled. "Nessie?"

Bella nodded in slow motion. "She's run off...with Nahuel..."

* * *

Without ever breaking their kiss, Nahuel lifted Nessie up into his arms and carried her to the nearest cabana. Pushing the flap of the canvas door aside, he ducked into the striped structure and set Nessie down on the lounging chair inside.

When he drew back, Nessie opened her eyes. Nahuel loomed over her; his fingers were lost in her hair as he drank in the sight before him. Murmuring in liquid Spanish, he lowered his lips to hers again.

Nessie's mind was blissfully blank as their tongues met and melded. She didn't even notice when his mouth left hers to trail kisses over her jaw. Unaware, she gripped his shirt as he nuzzled the nape of her neck. Her knee came up, unknowingly offering a cradle for his lower body.

Nahuel found and toyed with the bow at her shoulder. Nessie drew in a sharp breath when he tugged one end and the tie came undone. His breath was hot against her skin as he kissed the delicate hollow of her collarbone. His fingers curled around the edge of her bodice, inching it down ever so slowly.

His unblinking eyes found hers. She gave him the permission he sought with a single nod. His head lowered again, in order to run his tongue over every new inch of skin that he exposed. Nessie looked up at the striped canvas above them and bit her lip against the unfamiliar sensations.

She wanted to believe that she was ready for this.

She needed to believe that she wanted him.

* * *

To Be Continued


	17. Chapter 17

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: This was a hard chapter to write for a lot of reasons. It might be hard to read, but I really hope you will. Thank you all so much for all the amazing reviews. Lethar88...missed you last chapter! Hope all is well:)

Enjoy!

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

"Nahuel?" Jacob turned to Bella with accusation in his dark eyes. "You said she was in Rio with Alice."

"She is." Edward eased the phone out of Bella's limp hand and lifted it to his ear. "Alice, are you there?"

On the other end, he could hear his sister sniff. "I'm here. Edward, I'm so sorry! One minute she was right beside me and the next..."

"Have you tried following her scent?" he cut her apology off.

Alice sniffed again. "There were 90,000 people. All we could smell was blood and sweat and..." She paused. "Wait...Jasper wants to say something."

A second passed before Edward heard his brother's voice. "If you want us to call the police, Edward, I will, but I doubt they'll do anything tonight. A lot of people get lost during Carnival, most of them on purpose."

"What do you suggest, then?" Trying to keep the anger and panic out of his voice took a lot of effort; Edward's teeth clenched. "Sit back and wait? Anything could happen to her. She and Nahuel could..."

"Isn't that what you wanted?" Edward turned his head to his wife. Having recovered from her momentary shock, Bella glared at him. "Didn't you want her to move on with Nahuel?"

Jacob's fists balled up so tightly that his knuckles turned white.

"I admit, I pushed them together, but I never expected her to..."

"To what?" Bella pressed. "Fall for the first handsome, half-vampire who came along after her heart was broken? Are you really that blind, Edward?"

On the phone, having heard everything, Jasper cleared his throat. "If I could say something..."

"Jasper, just...find my daughter," Edward snapped at his brother before ending the call. Lowering the phone, he faced his wife. "It was a mistake, Bella! Is that what you want to hear? But don't tell me you didn't suspect that she might meet Nahuel at Zafrina's. I know you did...and you let Alice take her, anyway, remember?"

Bella had just opened her mouth to argue back when Jacob slammed his fist into her BMW, leaving a huge dent in the silver passenger-side door. The vampires stared at him as he struggled to collect himself. Blood dripped from his split knuckles, but he paid no attention to the pain.

"Call them back and tell them to call the police," Jacob growled.

Edward frowned, doing his best not to stare at the scarlet spatter on the gravel driveway. "That isn't your decision to make, Jacob."

Shaking his head, Jacob flexed his broken hand. "You don't know..."

"Know what?" Without inhaling, Bella tentatively reached out to touch his arm. "Jake...what don't we know?"

Jacob shut his eyes for a second as an unwanted memory replayed in his mind. "He wants her, Bella. He's always wanted her. Nahuel...from the minute he met her...he thinks Nessie is his destiny."

Edward arched an eyebrow. "I never heard anything like that from him. He was fixated on Bella back then...he just kept comparing her to his own mother."

"Yeah, 'cause he's not a complete idiot," Jacob snapped. "He knew you could read his thoughts, so he focused on Bella. But underneath that...it was Nessie on his mind."

"She was on your mind, too," Edward reminded him.

"Not like that." Jacob swore. "She was barely crawling...and he was already counting down the days until she was old enough to..." He stopped. "Now do you get it? Why I couldn't...let myself..."

Bella absolved him with a squeeze of his massive bicep. "You're not like him. She's not crawling anymore, Jake."

"How do you know all of this?" Nessie's father demanded, clearly ticked at the idea of Jacob knowing more of someone's thoughts than he did.

Jacob snorted. "Easy. The bastard told me. Right before he told me that if he ever had a chance with Nessie...he would take it. So, thanks, Edward. For giving it to him." Backing up towards the house, Jacob's eyes were haunted with ghosts of regret. "Don't worry, Bella. I'll fix your car," he added before he disappeared through the front door.

* * *

"So soft...and sweet." Nahuel's breath was warm against her skin as his lips traveled down the uncharted slope of her breast. He looked up at her. "Do you know how long I have been waiting for this night, my Renesmee?"

He didn't expect an answer, which was good because Nessie wouldn't have been able to form a complete sentence when he suddenly closed his mouth around her taut nipple. It felt...strange. Good, but not as wonderful as she'd always imagined it would.

Still, the unexpected sensation caused her back to arch which Nahuel took as a signal to keep going. After pausing to strip off his shirt, he turned to her other breast, showering it with the same attention.

Nessie laid her arm across her eyes, surprised at the slow burn of hot tears building up behind her eyelids. After tonight, no one could accuse her of being a child anymore. Everyone would have to see her as an adult, whether they liked it or not.

So why did she want to cry?

Completely unaware, Nahuel let his hand trail down her side until he found the hem of her skirt. "I have always believed," his accented voice murmured, "that you are my soul mate, Renesmee." She lowered her arm when he slipped his palm between her knees. "We were destined for each other...yes?"

Nessie's chest rose and fell. No one had ever touched her like this...and she had only imagined that one person ever would.

Nahuel's fingers skimmed down the smooth length of her inner thigh with no small amount of experience. When he reached the heat at the center of her body, she let out an involuntary gasp that put a wicked smile on his face.

"And there is so much more," he promised. Nahuel captured her lips with his own once again, crushing her tender breasts against his bare chest. "Let me show you..."

She could have let him. The feelings coursing through her were not unwelcome. Half of the girls in her class back home had done this for the first time in the back of a pick-up truck or in someone's bedroom during a keg party. She was on a beach in Rio de Janeiro, on the first night of Carnival, with a smolderingly handsome immortal man who believed she was his destiny.

The stuff of dreams.

It would have been very easy to let Nahuel keep going. But when he hooked a finger around the lacy edge of her bikini briefs, all Nessie could hear over the roar in her ears was her Aunt Rosalie's voice.

_When it's with someone you love..._

"Stop." With vampire reflexes, Nessie grabbed Nahuel's wrist before he reached his goal. "Stop!"

To his credit, Nahuel froze. He looked down at her with genuine concern. "Renesmee...have I hurt you?"

"No. It's just..." She shook her head against the canvas back of the lounging chair. "I can't do this." His blank face prompted her to push him back, away from her. Sitting up, she held the bodice of her dress against her breasts with one hand. "I'm sorry, Nahuel. I just...can't."

There was just enough light for her to see the confusion in his dark eyes. "Why?"

"Because..." A sob tore through her throat. "It's not more beautiful than I can imagine."

Nahuel didn't follow her as she stumbled out of the cabana and started to run, but this time, she didn't need him to. She knew exactly where she was going.

* * *

"He hung up on me." Jasper stared at Alice's phone. "I can't believe that kid!"

Despite the situation, Alice's lips curled up in amusement. It had been over thirty years since Jasper had called Edward a kid...and it was just as funny as it had been in 1985. Hiding her smile, she held out her hand for her phone. "He'll call back. He's upset." Her face fell. "We lost his only child."

"No, his only child ran away. Alice..."

She turned her head when her husband tried to cup her chin in his scarred palm. Ever since they had realized that Nessie and Nahuel were no longer part of the crowd cheering on the samba schools, Alice had accepted the heavy weight of responsibility onto her delicate shoulders and she wasn't willing to share it with anyone else.

"I told Bella I would take care of Nessie like she was my own." Alice's soft sniff was the only sound in their hotel room. "Maybe it's a good thing I could never have children. What kind of a mother would I have made?"

There was an edge of panic in her tone that worried Jasper. Kneeling down next to the chair she had curled up in, he took her hand between his and concentrated on projecting nothing but peace and tranquility.

But Alice knew him too well. "Let me be upset," she warned him. "I deserve it."

"I know a fair bit 'bout what you deserve, Alice." Her husband's accent thickened. "And if I had any say in the matter, a whole passel of little ones would be on the list, right after the sun and the moon." He squeezed her fingers. "'Cause, darlin'...you would've made one hell of a good mama to our kids."

Her expression softened at this, but never lost its shadow. "I'm just so worried about her, Jazz."

"If anyone tries to hurt Nessie, they will regret it long before any of us can get to them." He smiled. "That girl can take care of herself, even on the streets of Rio"

Alice swung her head back and forth slowly. "That's not what I'm worried about."

He knew this, so he stopped playing dumb. "If it happens, it happens, Alice. You've said it yourself...she's not a little girl anymore."

"I know." She frowned. "I know that." After a pause, she sighed and hugged her knees tighter. "I just don't think he's what she really wants."

"She's gonna have to figure that one out on her own." Jasper ducked his head to kiss her fingers. "Do you want to go out and look for her? Maybe we'll get lucky."

Alice let her chin drop to her chest. "I don't know," she groaned. "I never should have brought her here. I should have just left her with Rosalie. Then the only scary thing would have been Edward's credit card bill."

There was a knock on the door just then. "That must be the concierge," Jasper decided. Alice was puzzled. "When you were pacing the lobby, I asked him to call some of the local clubs with Nessie's description." He stood up. "It's a long shot, but you never know."

As her husband walked to the door, Alice laid her cheek down on her bare arm and stared out the plate glass window at the lights of the city. It was only when she heard silence, even after Jasper opened the door, that she turned her head out of curiosity.

Nessie was barefoot. Her hair was a tangled mess. One strap of her dress was undone; the other had been so hastily tied together that it was about to come loose. Her cheeks were streaked with the remnents of her makeup.

But she was there, in their doorway, safe and sound. And even though Alice had a thousand things she wanted to yell at her niece, that was really all that mattered.

"Aunt Alice?" Nessie's chin trembled. "I want to go home."

* * *

To Be Continued


	18. Chapter 18

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: Happy Valentine's Day everyone! Well, it's still Valentine's Day in LA, at least;) Enjoy and thank you so much for the reviews so far. I love that everyone's into the story. I hope you still will be...even after this chapter;)

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

The Cullen's garage was every mechanic's dream come to life. Not only was it a virtual car museum, but it was fully stocked with every gadget and tool necessary to keep the BMWs, Ferarri's, Aston Martins, Cadillacs and Mercedes' running in prime condition.

Jacob had lost hours, probably days, inside the garage as he tinkered with his bike or helped one of the Cullens with anything from an oil change to a full engine replacement. He had spent so much time there, in fact, that Nessie had practically worn down the surface of the long workstation by sitting on it as she'd watched him work.

Now, however, a day after his return to the house, Nessie wasn't perched on the counter bugging him with questions about gear shifts. He was alone as he worked on the damaged door of Bella's BMW.

The job was slow-going, especially with his damaged hand. Carlisle had reset the two broken bones that he'd given himself the day before and even though they were already mostly healed, he was still in a bit of pain.

He had decided it was nothing he didn't deserve.

So he kept going, despite the throbbing in his fingers and knuckles. Once he had removed the busted door from the car, Jacob set about separating the dented skin from the frame. After two hours, he was so lost in concentration that it took him awhile to realize that he was no longer alone.

When he went to rub a trickle off sweat off his temple with the sleeve of his shirt, Jacob jumped at the sight of Esme standing next to Jasper's Audi A8.

"Forgive me," she immediately apologized. "I just thought you might be hungry."

It was then that he noticed the tray in her hands. As she came closer, he could see a bowl of steaming tomato soup, a thick sandwich and a tall glass of lemonade. The food was simple, but in true Cullen-style, it was served on fine china and accompanied by real silverware.

His expression relaxed. "I am." Pushing his protective goggles up into his mess of black hair, he smiled briefly. "Thank you."

Mindless of what any oil or dust might do to her silk blouse and linen skirt, Esme pulled a work stool over from the counter, crossed one slim ankle over the other and watched him start to eat.

"BLT," Jacob said after swallowing a big bite of the sandwich.

"It's still your favorite, isn't it?" He nodded and Esme looked relieved. "Good. It's not often that I get to fry bacon anymore. I used to hate it, when I was human. The grease would pop and burn my hands." She paused, her hand unconsciously moving to the pearls at her throat. As she continued, she rolled the luminous beads between her fingers. "But my husband wanted it every morning. Eventually, I just stopped feeling the burns."

Unsure of what to say, Jacob just sipped his soup. The Cullens so rarely talked about their human lives that it almost felt like he was intruding on Esme's privacy, even if she was volunteering the information.

Dropping the strand of pearls, Esme blinked out of her memories. "Are you settling back in all right? Is there anything you need?"

He choked on a dry breadcrumb. After a swig of lemonade to wash it down, he shook his head. "No. Really, you've done enough." He cleared his throat. "I should be asking what you need me to do around here."

"You're already giving me a excuse to cook again," Esme reminded him. "I confess, I rather missed it."

Jacob tried to smile, but it fell flat. "I'm sorry." Swallowing heavily, he dragged his spoon through his soup. "I'm really sorry, Esme."

They weren't talking about cooking anymore and Esme acknowledged this with a dip of her chin. "I know," she murmured. Her soft, golden eyes sought out his. "And just so you know...Carlisle and I are so very glad that you've come home."

Home. The one word made his throat close up. Was this huge mansion in the middle of the woods that was populated with vampires really his home? The garage, the grand foyer, the heated pool, the massive kitchen, the bedrooms with beds that were never slept in...did they add up to more than just a house?

No, he decided. There was one element that was missing. One piece of the puzzle that would turn the stone, wood and glass structure into his true home.

She just happened to be in Rio. With an immortal pervert.

His appetite gone, Jacob set the tray aside. "I should get back to work."

After ninety years with Edward, Esme knew how to deal with strong-willed, guilt-stricken young men. Rather than let him blow her off, she reached for his bandaged hand. "I know how it feels to lose what you love the most," she said. "But while we might make mistakes, we are not mistakes ourselves, Jacob, no matter what we do."

His Adam's apple bobbed. "I really want to believe that, but I..."

"Esme." Edward stood in the doorway that led back into the house, his hands in the pockets of his dark pants. He ignored Jacob, as he had been doing for the past 24 hours. "Alice just called." He hesitated. "They're flying home tonight."

Jacob couldn't stop himsef. "Nessie, too?"

Edward's jaw twitched. "Bella and I are going to pick them up from the airport. May we take your Escalade?"

"Of course," Esme told her son. "Perhaps Jacob could..."

"There aren't enough seats," Edward cut her off. "Sorry." It was rude, but Esme chose not to reprimand him.

Not right then, at least.

When he was gone, Jacob stood up and walked back to the BMW door. Esme watched him for a minute before she stood up.

"I'm going to leave this." She indicated his half-consumed lunch. "Just in case." With another, comforting smile, she left the garage as silently as she'd entered it.

Jacob dropped his glasses back into place and reached for the abandoned welder. His heart was beating wildly in his chest, but he forced himself to concentrate on the task in front of him. Nessie was coming home!

Yet...Edward had indicated that all six of the Escalade's seats had already been claimed. Jacob fought back a wave of nausea as a terrible thought struck him. Before the day was through, he would see Nessie again.

But he might also see Nahuel.

* * *

Alice was worried and her anxiety was preventing Jasper from concentrating on his book. When it finally got to the point where he had read one paragraph three times and still had no idea what it said, Jasper marked his place and reached for his wife's hand.

"What is it?" he asked, keeping his voice low in the silence of the first-class cabin.

She said nothing, but all Jasper had to do was follow her eyes to find the source of her worry.

An empty seat and an aisle separated them from Nessie. Their niece sat alone at the window like a porcelain doll. Her hair, makeup and clothes were impeccable, but her eyes were lifeless as she stared into the dark clouds.

She hadn't spoken more than a dozen words to them since she had returned to the hotel and announced her desire to go home. After Jasper had told her he would make the arrangements, Nessie had locked herself in her own suite.

The hotel's plumbing was state of the art, but they had still heard her shower turn on a few minutes later. It had run for over an hour, long enough for Alice's imagination to run positively wild as she tried to figure out what had happened to Nessie on the streets of Rio.

It had something to do with Nahuel, she was sure, and only the fact that he never returned to his suite kept Alice from seeking him out with murderous intent.

But Nessie had said nothing more than what was absolutely necessary for basic communication. She turned down offers of food and drink from the flight attendants with only a shake of her head and when Alice had offered to join her on her side of the aisle, she had just laid her cheek against the rim of the window and closed her eyes.

With one finger, Jasper coaxed his wife's stare away from their niece, but even when she was looking at him, her mind was still on Nessie. "Tell me what she's feeling," Alice begged her husband. "I just need to know what to say to her."

Jasper sighed as he stroked her pale cheek. "Nessie's clearly not ready for us to know what happened in Rio. Maybe she never will be. But until she is, I have to respect her privacy."

"You weren't so concerned with Nahuel's privacy."

"Well, he's not family."

Alice scowled. "I would tell you what I saw if I could see anything about her."

"That would be your choice." Jasper tempered his words with a kiss to her knuckles. "This is mine, darlin'."

With a frustrated sigh, Alice threw herself back against the plush leather seat and looked at Nessie again. "She's the one who nearly scared us to death...so why are we the ones being punished?"

Because he had no answer to give, Jasper just took her hand and shook open his book.

Two hours later, they landed in Portland.

Nessie remained silent as they deboarded and made their way through the terminal. But when they passed the security checkpoint and emerged into the main airport, only to find Bella and Edward waiting for them, something resembling happiness flickered across her flawless face.

Still, it was Bella who ran for her daughter, not the other way around. And although Nessie accepted her mother's embrace and the strong hand her father placed on her shoulder, she pulled away from her parents too soon for their liking.

"I need to find the restroom." It was the first complete sentence she'd uttered in almost a day and having said it, Nessie walked off, garnering more than a few looks from the men she passed by.

Stunned, Bella turned to her sister. "What happened to my little girl, Alice?"

Edward's eyes followed his daughter through the crowd. He hadn't been able to sort through all of her jumbled thoughts, but he had seen enough to know one thing for certain.

Nessie wasn't a little girl anymore.

* * *

Not only had Jacob fixed the dent in Bella's car, he had rotated the tires, changed the air filter, topped off the fluid tanks and washed the entire vehicle by hand, including the undercarriage. The BMW was in better condition than it had been when Bella drove it off the lot.

But he was still a nervous wreck.

When Bella and Edward left for the airport, Jacob tried to eat the rest of the soup that Esme had made at lunchtime, but his stomach was too jumpy. He sat down to watch TV, but there was nothing good on any of the eight hundred channels the Cullens received. Eventually he wandered up to the second floor.

Although he started for his own room, the pink block letter sign that spelled out Nessie's full name drew him to her door. He had avoided it ever since his return, but now he tentatively turned the knob and stepped inside.

Nothing had changed since the day he had told her about Leah. Not a picture frame or book was out of place and the whole room still smelled of green apples and clean linens. Jacob ran his fingers over her desk and up the edge of her dresser.

Bypassing the picture of a pint-sized Nessie sitting on his shoulders, he reached for a more recent photograph. It had been taken on his birthday just a year earlier; the party hat on his head had been at Nessie's insistence. Just before Bella snapped the picture, he had slung his arm over Nessie's shoulders like a big brother. What he hadn't noticed until right then was the way she looked up at him just as shutter clicked.

She had just turned six. Her body was that of young girl...developing, but still clearly adolescent. But in her eyes there was nothing but sure and steady love...for him.

Jacob had no idea how long he stood in Nessie's moon-lit bedroom, staring at the picture, but eventually, he heard the front door open.

His hands shook as he set the frame down. His mouth ran dry as he left the room and started down the stairs.

His heart threatened to explode right out of his chest when he looked down at the foyer and saw Nessie in her grandmother's arms.

"Oh, sweetheart, we have missed you so much!" Esme hugged her tighter. "Welcome home!"

Still out of sight high up on the stairs, Jacob watched Nessie try to smile at this, but the expression was weak and half-hearted. "I've missed you, too," she murmured.

Carlisle embraced her next and for a split second, Nessie let herself relax against her grandfather. But only a moment later, she straightened up, stepped back and shook her glossy curls away from her face.

"Where's Aunt Rosalie?" she asked. "I need to see her."

Edward and Bella exchanged a look. "She's still in Europe, Renesmee," Edward answered.

Was it Jacob's imagination or did Nessie flinch. "Please don't call me that." She readjusted the wide strap of her shoulder bag. "It's been a long day. I think I'll go to bed."

"Nessie, there's something you should know before..."

But she was already halfway up the stairs. Bella's warning was too late. Nessie had already locked eyes with Jacob.

He took one step down, one step closer to her. And while he wanted the first words he spoke to her in two months to be profound and perfect, all he could come up with was, "Hey."

Nessie stared at him with an unreadable expression. There was something in her eyes...or rather something lacking in her eyes...that terrified him. This wasn't the girl in the picture who had been enraptured by him. Nor was this the young woman who had thrown herself between him and her father on their last day together.

His Nessie had changed.

"I'm really tired." She let him process this for a second before she started ascending the steps again. As she passed by him, Jacob caught whisper of her scent, freesia and fresh air. Different, but just as intoxicating. "Excuse me."

And then, she was gone. Her bedroom door closed. But it was the sound of the lock twisting into place that drove a knife into Jacob's gut.

Although nothing had changed in Nessie's room, it seemed like everything had changed in her heart.

* * *

To Be Continued


	19. Chapter 19

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: I know everyone is very worried about Nessie, but all will be revealed in its own time. For now, just trust that you haven't missed anything. There won't be another update until next week as I'll be at a convention this weekend, but I hope you enjoy the chapter! Thanks for everything!

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

There couldn't have been a more inconvenient time for Rosalie's cell phone to start ringing.

Tearing her lips away from her husband's, she sat up on top of him, putting one hand on his chest for leverage. When she reached towards the nightstand, Emmett grabbed her wrist.

"What are you doing, Rose?"

She looked down at him with as much superiority as she could muster. Her tangled blonde curls cascaded over her bare shoulders, all the way to her well-loved breasts. "It could be important."

Her husband gestured to their joined bodies. "And this isn't?"

Leaning down, Rosalie gave him a long kiss that had him bucking beneath her by the time she was through. Just before the call went to voicemail, she grabbed her cell. "Hello, Bella," she answered, much to Emmett's dismay.

"Have I called at a bad time?" Bella asked.

Rosalie looked down at her frustrated husband. "Depends on how you define bad." Pressing her lips to her fingers, she transferred a kiss to his mouth before sliding off of him. Gloriously naked, she stood up and reached for her silk robe. "But I can talk for a minute."

"Okay." She could almost see Bella frowning. "Where are you, by the way?"

"Prague," Rosalie replied, tying the robe's belt around her slender waist. "You should make Edward take you sometime. It's a gorgeous city."

"I'll remember that." Bella paused. "Look, I know you were upset that I let Alice take Nessie to..."

"I wasn't upset."

A second ticked by. "Really?"

The dryness in Bella's voice irked her. "Nessie wanted to go with her," Rosalie snapped. "Why would I be upset about that?"

"Fine, you weren't upset," Bella accquiesed. "I just thought you'd like to know that they're back now."

Rosalie's eyes shot to the bed where Emmett was still sprawled without shame. "Well," she said after taking a moment to process this. "That's great. Thanks for the update."

"Rosalie..." Edward's wife sighed softly. "She keeps asking when you're coming home."

"Alice does?"

Bella ignored the sneered sarcasm in her sister's tone. "Something happened to Nessie in Rio...and I think you might be the only one she'll talk to about it."

Several seconds ticked by in silence, long enough for Emmett to sit up on his elbows, his growing concern evident in his frown.

"What are you saying?" Rosalie finally asked. "That she was..." Her throat closed up. "She doesn't know about me...unless you've told her. Have you told her?" she demanded.

"No, of course I haven't."

Having recovered slightly, Rosalie's next fervent question was, "Is Nessie okay?"

"She's...different. But Edward swears nothing like that happened to her. He can't see everything, though. She's holding so much back." Bella paused, like she was chewing on her lower lip. It was a nervous habit that had stayed with her after death. "She was alone with Nahuel for a long time. Who knows what could have..."

Rosalie cut her off. "Wait, Nahuel? Oh my god...Bella! Did you seriously let Alice drag Nessie down to South America so you could fix her up with that creepy kid?"

"You think he's creepy?"

"I think that anyone who looks at a toddler the way he looked at Nessie is damn creepy." On the bed, Emmett's frown had turned into a growl. Holding out her hand to placate him, Rosalie added, "Of course, creepy is better than a dog who can't keep it in his pants."

Bella was quiet for a second. "You know what? Forget I called. Stay in Prague. I'm sure Nessie will be fine without..."

Biting back her pride, Rosalie cut her off. "Okay, look, when I get back, I'll keep the jabs at Jacob to a minimum. No more than the usual stuff."

"How about you lay off him entirely?"

Rosalie tilted her head to one side, her tangled curls tumbling over her shoulder. "Really, Bella. I have absolutely no interest in sainthood." Before she hung up, she told her sister, "We'll fly back tomorrow. Give Nessie our love until then."

Emmett sat up as she walked back to the bed. "Just what was that all about, Rose?"

"Oh, we're needed back home." He watched with fresh hunger in his eyes as his wife unbelted her robe and let it puddle around her feet. Climbing back on top of him, Rosalie sighed. "Apparently, everything goes to hell when we're gone."

* * *

Nessie woke to the sound of raindrops against her window. The skies were crying, she thought as she lay beneath the covers, trying to work up the will to start the day.

She was supposed to start back at school with a note from Carlisle that excused her from gym on account of the recent bout of mono which had kept her home since Christmas, but Nessie already knew that if she went at all, she would be leaving early. It would be torture to try to sit through algebra and French when her head was such a mess.

At some point, she must have drifted back to sleep, but a well-timed knock on her door jolted her awake.

"Nessie." Her father called to her from out in the hallway. "We're leaving in an hour."

It took a lot of effort to drag herself out of bed. Her room was freezing; someone must have forgotten to turn the heat on the night before, not a rare occurence when one lived in a house full of people who never got hot or cold.

Shivering, Nessie slipped out of her bedroom and walked down the hall to the bathroom. Esme had designed the house to have two restrooms downstairs for any potential human guests, but upstairs there was only one, as only two people had ever needed the facilities for anything more than an extra mirror.

Unfortunately, while she was out of the country, Nessie had gotten out of the habit of knocking on the bathroom door. Without thinking, she reached for the antique glass knob and pushed the door open.

Steam swirled around her and when it cleared, she came face to face with the undeniably disconcerting sight of Jacob shaving at the mirror, clad in nothing but a small, white towel.

Her sharp inhale had him turning his head so fast that he nicked a piece of skin off his cheek with his razor. He cursed as blood dripped down to the sink.

"I'm sorry!" Suddenly, she wasn't at all cold anymore. In fact, her face felt downright hot. "I should have knocked!"

With one hand against the very minor wound, Jacob grabbed the folded top of his towel to ensure that it stayed in place. "No, it's okay! Really...it'll be healed by..." He swallowed suddenly. "By breakfast."

It was then that Nessie realized...part of the reason she might have been so cold before was that she'd gone to bed in only a fitted tank top and a pair of boyshorts.

And Jacob had just noticed.

She folded her arms across her breasts, but that only made her top ride up enough to expose her flat belly. "Still...sorry."

Jacob took a step towards her. "Nessie..."

His russet skin was wet from his shower...just as Nahuel's had been after their swim at the waterfall. The memory felt like a slap across the face. Shaking her head, Nessie backed out of the bathroom. "I can't," she whispered.

"Please, Nessie." His eyes were liquid chocolate as they pleaded with her. "Yell at me, scream at me, hit me...whatever! Just don't..." When the right word wouldn't come to him immediately, he swore under his breath. "Don't do this."

"Do what?" She sniffed softly. "What am I doing?"

He swung his head back and forth, the ink-black locks of his hair flinging drops of water. "You're not...yourself."

"Myself?" Nessie repeated. "How can any of you possibly know exactly who I am?" She lifted her shoulders. "I'm only seven years old...remember?"

But he wouldn't accept that as an answer. "What happened in Rio?"

"Nothing."

Jacob's eyes narrowed. "We've never lied to each other before."

Nessie glared right back at him. "Why do you think I'm lying?"

"Because of him!" he exploded. "You ran off with him...and you came back different!"

"That's what this is really about," Nessie said a moment later. "Nahuel. Isn't it?"

Jacob took ten seconds to calm himself before he spoke again. "Did he hurt you, Nessie?"

"The only person who's ever hurt me is you." Nessie jerked a thumb at the blood on the marble sink. "I'd clean that up before someone smells it." With that, she turned on her heel, stalked back to her room and slammed the door shut behind her.

She was completely unaware of her mother standing at the other end of the hall, a witness to the entire scene.

* * *

"She's so angry." Turning an apple over and around in her hands, Bella stared blankly at its dark red skin. "I don't even need you to tell me that, Jasper."

Across the lunch table, her brother-in-law smiled briefly. "I'm just sorry I can't tell you why she is."

"Me, too," Alice said miserably.

Next to Bella, Edward pretended to take a sip of Coke from his full can. When he noticed his family staring at him, he lowered his drink. "Don't look at me. My daughter has taken to reciting the periodic table of elements whenever I'm nearby." Although he tried to joke, there was real hurt in his golden eyes. "She doesn't want me in her head."

Bella let the apple drop back onto her tray. "She has to talk to someone."

"Rosalie."

She nodded at Jasper. "Nessie does keep asking for her."

"No, I mean...look." He pointed at the entrance to the cafeteria where Rosalie and Emmett, fresh off a plane from the Czech Republic, had just made their grand entrance. It might have been Rosalie's brand new Prada boots or the extra gleam in Emmett's eyes, but more than a few stares were fixed on them as they made their way across the room.

"No one is going to believe that she's had mono," Edward muttered. Underneath the table, Bella squeezed his knee as she bit back a smile.

A real reunion would have to wait until they weren't surrounded by humans. Rosalie and Emmett slipped into the two empty seats at the table like they had seen their family that very morning.

"Hey, Bella," Emmett grinned. "You gonna pretend to eat that?"

The apple was in his hands before she could reply. With movements so quick that even she had a hard time following them, he tore out a chunk of the fruit with his hand like he had just taken a big bite.

She rolled her eyes as he made the motions of chewing. "You know you missed me," he winked.

Rosalie tossed her curls over her shoulder. "Yes, yes, hello and all of that," she greeted them impatiently. "Where's Nessie?"

"She changed her schedule," Alice told her sister. "She went back to regular freshman lunch, which was last period."

"Just what did you all do to my niece?" Rosalie demanded.

Before Edward could act on his sudden flare of anger, Jasper jumped in. "Let's not act like we didn't know the day would come when Nessie would need some space from us." He glanced at each of them in turn. "We were all so worried 'bout whether she was a child or an adult that we forgot to just let her be a teenager."

Rosalie snapped, "We're all teenagers."

"Yes, but only some of us choose to act like it," Edward scowled.

"Can you two just stop?" Bella looked back and forth between them. "This isn't about us. It's about Nessie." She let her gaze rest on Rosalie. "I don't know why she wants to talk to you, but at this point it doesn't even hurt anymore than she does. I just want to see her smile again. So...thanks for coming back."

"I would do anything for that girl," Rosalie said with all seriousness.

"We all would," Emmett added.

"So would Jacob," Alice reminded them.

"Since when did you become the dog..." Rosalie corrected herself. "...Jacob's champion, Alice?"

Alice glanced at Bella. "Since he started needing more than one." Bella flashed her sister a quick, grateful smile. "Besides, you don't always have to have a vision in order to see the future."

"What does that mean?" Emmett asked.

She shrugged her tiny shoulders. "I don't know. It's just a feeling I get...that tells me Jacob is going to be around for a long time to come."

"Great." Rosalie crossed her legs and folded her arms defiantly. "I had just started to get the smell out of my clothes."

The bell rang and they dutifully gathered their trays and parted to their separate classes. On their way to biology, Bella and Edward passed their daughter in the hallway. But with her nose buried in a book, Nessie brushed past her parents without even seeing them.

"I went through whole days without speaking to Charlie when you were gone," Bella said as she watched Nessie disappear into the crowd. "Is this what he felt like back then?"

Edward reached for her hand. "If so, no wonder he still doesn't like me."

* * *

To Be Continued


	20. Chapter 20

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: Sorry for the delay in getting this chapter out. I had to make some big decisions and it took awhile to get my thoughts in order. Enjoy and thank you so much for all of your support and kind words!

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

While the other girls in her grade probably would have been happy if Nessie had never recovered from her mono, at least one person outside of her family was glad to see her back at school.

Her English teacher, Mr. Cobb, a man who had the unenviable task of trying to make 21st century teenagers care about 19th century literature, lit up when Nessie, his best student, took her old seat at the front of his classroom.

"Welcome back, Miss Cullen," he greeted her. "I take it you're feeling better?"

She had become very good at faking a smile when it was necessary. "Much better, thanks."

"All caught up and ready for the Bronte sisters?"

Having spent the night before going over the assignments she'd missed, Nessie nodded as she pulled a new copy of _Wuthering Heights_ out of her bag. Her grandfather had a first edition of the book from 1847, but for obvious reasons, it had to stay in the controlled climate of Carlisle's library.

After the bell rang and the few stragglers found their seats, Mr. Cobb opened his own book. "All right, let's get started. We left off in chapter nine yesterday, with Catherine talking to Nelly, unaware that Heathcliff is listening. Would anyone like to read from there?" He barely scanned the classroom before he settled on Nessie. "Miss Cullen?"

The last thing she wanted to do was to read out loud, but Mr. Cobb was counting on her. After he directed her to the right page, she cleared her throat.

"_If all else perished and he remained, I should still continue to be; and if all else remained and he were annihilated..._" To her great disconcertion, Nessie's throat closed up suddenly. It was a second before she could go on. "..._the universe would turn to a mighty stranger._" She blinked once. Twice. "_I should not seem a part of it._"

If Mr. Cobb noticed her hesitation, he said nothing. "How does Catherine truly feel about Heathcliff? Anyone?"

"She loves him," someone in the back volunteered without raising their hand.

"Yes, definitely," Mr. Cobb agreed. "But would you say it's a healthy kind of love?" He gave his class, at least those who weren't already settling down for a nap, a minute to think this over. "Come on," he urged them. "She's not just saying that she loves him...she's saying that she would be a stranger to the world if he wasn't in it. Look at the words she uses: perished and annihilated. That's frightening language, don't you think?"

"Love...it isn't always good for us," Nessie murmured.

Mr. Cobb nodded. "I think that's exactly what Emily Bronte is trying to say. Making another person the center of your universe is dangerous. Because we're all just human, right? We age, we make mistakes, we die. And as we'll discover later, loving Heathcliff does not end well for Catherine. Mr. Matthews, could you start where Miss Cullen ended, please?"

Nessie's fingernails dug into the soft cover of her book as she tried to keep her hands steady. It was all she could do to stay seated and listen to her classmates butcher the prose with their boredom. She wanted to run away, but this time to a place where no one would ever find her.

A place where she could be alone, where she would never have to hear about destinies and imprints ever again.

Emily Bronte was on the right track, but she just had no idea.

Mr. Cobb was probably disappointed in her, but as soon as the final bell rang, Nessie was on her feet and out the door. She had promised both her biology and history teachers that she would stay after to get some of the notes that she'd missed, but what was one more day in the grand scheme of things? She would outlive both teachers' great-great-grandchildren; surely that was enough time to learn about cellular mitosis and the Revolutionary War.

She stopped at her locker only long enough to swap out a few books, but when she closed the metal door, her Aunt Rosalie was on the other side, waiting for her.

"Act natural," Rosalie said when Nessie's eyes grew wide in happy surprise. "We've been sick at home together, remember?" Blinking back tears, Nessie nodded. "You know, Europe just wasn't the same without you," Rosalie added with a sad smile.

Nessie's chin quivered. "I should have stayed there," she whispered. "I'm sorry I didn't."

"You have absolutely nothing to be sorry for, sweetheart. Got that?" Rosalie stepped away from the lockers and waited for Nessie to follow. "How about we send Emmett home with the others and you and I drive back together? I hear you've been wanting to talk to me."

"I really only wanted to ask you one thing," Nessie said when they reached Rosalie's Lexus. On the driver's side of the car, Rosalie tried to pretend that she wasn't at all hurt by this as she waited for her niece to go on. "Aunt Rosalie..." In the afternoon sun, Nessie's hair was like molten bronze flowing over her shoulders.

"I need you to tell me exactly why you hate Jacob so much."

* * *

As if the universe wanted to drive home the fact that he was completely disconnected from everyone he loved, Jacob found out via text message from Seth that he had just become an uncle.

_Rachel had the baby. William Blackpaw, freaking 9 1/2 lbs. Paul passed the hell out. We have pics. Congrats, Uncle Jake!_

Attached to the message was a promised picture of Seth and Embry pointing and laughing at Paul who was slumped down unconscious in a hospital chair. There was not, however, a photo of the newest member of the Quileute tribe.

Even though his phone was brand new and state of the art, an anonymous welcome-home present that had no doubt been purchased by Esme Cullen herself, probably the same person who had seen that Sam had his new number, Jacob threw the device across the room where it landed safely on his bed and buried his face in his hands.

What the hell was he doing back in Oregon? Besides Bella, Esme, Alice and possibly Carlisle, no one really wanted him around. Edward hated him, Jasper tolerated him, Rosalie would have gladly pushed him off a cliff, Emmett didn't care either way and Nessie...

He jumped to his feet as if the sudden movement would push her out of his thoughts. It didn't work. Whenever he closed his eyes, all he could see was her standing in the bathroom that morning in what had barely passed as clothing, her hair mussed from sleep, her bottom lip full and ripe like she'd been worrying it between her teeth.

He already knew she would be in his dreams that night. He almost couldn't wait to fall asleep, just so his subconscience could do what he hadn't been able to...namely gathering her up in his arms and carrying her into the shower with him.

Was this all he would have of Nessie for the rest of his life? Dreams? Whispers of scenarios that would never happen? Even if that was what he deserved, an abnormally long existence of torture seemed unbearable. Better to never phase again and let his body start aging. Get it over with faster. Maybe he'd come back in his next life as someone with absolutely no special powers or supernatural destiny.

Downstairs, the antique grandfather clock that was Esme's pride and joy tolled three times. He used to love that sound as it meant that school was out and Nessie was on her way home. Now, however, the heavy chimes felt like punches straight to his stomach.

He had to get out of the house.

Knowing the woods around the Cullen's house almost as well as he knew the reservation back home, Jacob took off on foot towards a stream he and Nessie had discovered when she was four.

_"We'll call it River Renesmee!" _he had declared much to Nessie's delight. _"And we'll charge everyone a quarter to cross it."_

_"Two quarters," _she had decreed. _"Then we can build a bridge!" _

The bridge had never happened, but once Nessie had shared the story with the Cullens, the name of the stream stuck. Even up until his departure that Christmas, they had still used River Renesmee as a way of measuring distance from the house when they were hunting.

In the dying days of February, the stream was ice cold, but free-flowing. Jacob crouched at the water's edge and stared at his reflection in the rippling water. He was so lost in thought that it took a second for him to notice a second face in the glassy surface.

Jacob shot up, every nerve on fire, every instinct on alert. The first thing he saw was a pair of wide, wild eyes so bright red that it was painful to look at them. He knew that color.

He hated that color.

The newborn vampire could have been mistaken for any of the kids at Nessie's school. In fact, she might have been one not so long ago. But Jacob had no opportunity to mourn for a lost life. The vampire had snuck up on him with the obvious intention of feeding, no matter what Jacob might have smelled like to her. She lunged for him with a terrible growl that brought back so many unwanted memories.

Leaping backwards, Jacob burst into wolf-form, his clothes shredding beyond repair. He saw the vampire's shock and hesitation through his narrowed canine glare, but her instincts kicked in within seconds. She was a vampire and he was her enemy.

The last time he had taken on a newborn, he'd been in prime fighting condition...and he'd still spent a week in bed recovering from all the broken bones. In fact, the only reason he had survived the encounter was because Sam and the others had been there to help him.

There was no one now and the nearest help was two miles away.

But his own instincts were strong. He was a wolf and this was his territory to protect. With a snarl, Jacob attacked.

* * *

Rosalie waited until they were clear of the school's parking lot before she addressed her niece's request. "First of all," she began, breaking the silence that fallen over them. "Can I just say that I'm not thrilled with the idea that you think I hate Jacob."

"Aunt Rosalie." Nessie leveled her with a cool look. "Please don't patronize me."

Her temper flared. "I'm not..." After counting to ten, Rosalie tried again. "Hate is a very strong word."

"Are you seriously trying to tell me that for my whole life, I've imagined every insult you've thrown at Jacob? Sure, he was happy to return the favor, but it's always been you who's started it." Nessie paused to let this sink in. "I just want to know what he did to deserve it."

Rosalie turned a corner more sharply that she had intended. Her pale, willowy fingers gripped the steering wheel tighter. "Why?"

"Can't you just indulge me?"

"I think everyone's been indulging you for long enough," Rosalie tossed back. "We love you, Nessie, but do you have any idea what you've been putting your parents through?"

"I'm sorry if they're unhappy, but they can't just..." Nessie stopped short.

Rosalie took her eyes off the road for a second, just in time to see her niece look away. "Can't just what?"

Nessie shook her head. "Just tell me what Jacob did to make you hate him." She glanced back at her aunt with watery eyes. "I need to know."

A second passed. "So you can hate him, too?" Rosalie guessed. When Nessie turned away again, she reached for the girl's hand. "Nessie..."

Jerking her hand away, Nessie balled her fists up and crossed her arms tightly. "What did he do, Aunt Rosalie? There must have been something. It can't just be that he's a wolf because you don't say anything bad about any of the other wolves. Did you two fight? Did he attack Uncle Emmett? Did he...I don't know...ruin one of your cars? Rip out a chunk of your hair? Something worse? Something that no one's ever told me about? What was it?"

Nessie's anger lingered in the air long after she stopped yelling. Without a word, Rosalie turned onto the next side street, pulled the car up to the curb and shifted into park.

"I might have hated Jacob in the past, I won't lie," Rosalie began. "But to be fair, I hated your mother once upon a time for reasons I'd rather not get into right now." She lifted her shoulder. "What can I say? I've never denied that I can be a serious bitch."

"You're not a bitch," Nessie murmured.

Rosalie smiled. "You're one of the few people whose opinion on that matters to me. But the truth, Nessie, is that I have none of Alice's sweetness and even less of your mother's acceptance of others. I make judgements and I hold grudges. And it's very hard to change my mind about anything or anyone."

"I know how much you're capable of loving, Aunt Rosalie. So whatever Jacob did, it must have been..."

"Jacob didn't do anything." Nessie stared at her. "Beyond the smell, the only thing Jacob's ever done wrong up until Christmas was to care so much about your well-being that he didn't even think I was good enough to hold you. That drove me crazy...but I've never hated him for it. How can I hate him for loving the person for whom I would lay down my own life, such as it is?"

Nessie slowly shook her head. "I don't understand."

"I have been hard on him. Harder than I realized." Rosalie shifted in her seat to see her niece better. "Nessie...there are a lot of things you don't know about me. Those can wait for another day, but what you need to know right now is that my greatest wish in life...my only wish...was to have a child of my own."

"Aunt Rosalie..."

It was Rosalie's turn to shake her head. "You know that can't ever happen. But when you came along, even though you weren't mine, I could love you like the child I never had. And I did. I do. You're Bella's daughter and you're Jacob's..." She ground the word out. "...imprint, but I held you before either of them. Ever since that moment, I have done everything in my power to protect you. I always will, Nessie."

With one touch to her aunt's hand, Nessie showed her the first memory she had...Rosalie's blond hair, golden eyes and beautiful smile looking down at her.

"I know." Nessie drew her hand back. "Maybe the universe got everything wrong."

Rosalie frowned. "What do you mean?"

"I don't know," Nessie shrugged. "Maybe I should have been your daughter instead."

"Whatever you're feeling right now," Rosalie said after a second, "your parents don't deserve you even thinking that."

"They sent me to South America. They wanted me to meet...him." Nessie's tone was razor sharp. "Would you have played with my life like that?" When Rosalie said nothing, she nodded. "Yeah, I didn't think so."

They sat in silence for several minutes until the digital panel in the dashboard signaled an incoming call to Rosalie's phone, via Bluetooth. With a frustrated sigh, she hit the button to answer the call through the car's audio system. "Yes?"

Esme's voice filled the car. "Rosalie, is Nessie with you?"

"I'm here," Nessie answered for herself.

Esme paused. "You both should come home now."

There was something heavy in the usually gentle woman's tone that sent a chill down Nessie's spine. "What's going on, Esme?" Rosalie asked, never taking her eyes off Nessie's suddenly paler face.

"There's been an...an attack." She hesitated. "It's Jacob." Nessie's breath caught in the back of her throat. "He's been hurt."

* * *

To Be Continued


	21. Chapter 21

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: I made a little mistake in the last chapter and I had to correct it. Nothing major...just at the very end I had to make a character switch. I hate it when I have continuity fail:( Sorry, y'all. I'm also sorry that this chapter is a little short, but this is how it ended up. I could force more into it, but not only wouldn't it flow right, it would be delayed, and I've left everyone on the cliff long enough. Enjoy and thanks:)

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

Nessie was out of the car before Rosalie could stop her. As she raced for the edge of the forest, she could hear her aunt yelling her name, ordering her to stop, but she ignored her. Even with a vampire behind the wheel, it would take twenty minutes to get to the house by road. Cutting across the mountain would take no more than ten.

As she dodged trees and leaped over rocks, Nessie could feel her heart pounding in her chest, faster and harder than it ever had before. She ran entirely from memory because all she could see was Jacob's face, his white smile, his laughing eyes. Tears blurred her vision, but didn't slow her down.

Her mind was blank, as if it had given up trying to process all of the horrible thoughts that had come to her the moment Esme said that Jacob had been hurt. Because what did that mean? Hurt? Jacob was a wolf...a huge, indestructible wolf! He didn't get hurt!

No one she loved ever got hurt; that was one of the great comforts of her crazy life. She would never be an orphan, the only grandparents she would ever lose were the two she never saw, and Jacob would always be there for her, like he had promised. Death and loss...those were human fears. It was stupid to waste time trying to prepare for something she would never experience.

Only now, as she reached the familiar woods that told her home was near, she wondered if she was the stupid one for assuming that her world could never change.

Nessie emerged from the dense line of trees, unaware of the fact that her shirt was torn and the legs of her jeans were spattered with mud. The first thing she noticed were the haphazardly parked cars in the driveway. Beyond them, she saw her mother, Alice and Jasper and Emmett outside the house; they were pacing, holding hands and kicking gravel, respectively.

Bella's head shot up when she sensed movement in the forest. Her worried eyes locked with her daughter's for no more than a second before Nessie started to run towards them.

"Nessie!" Bella tried to catch her, but Nessie slipped out of her reach and kept going for the door. "No, Nessie! Don't..."

Jasper was closest to the door and he managed to get his arms around his niece, but when Nessie started fighting him, he shot Bella an apologetic look and released her, allowing her to push her way into the house.

The metalllic scent of blood hit Nessie like a semi-truck, immediately explaining why everyone was outside. A great wave of fear washed over her when she noticed a broken trail of heavy, dark red drops on the floor leading up the stairs.

She couldn't breathe, but she forced herself to follow them to the second floor, down the hallway...to her bedroom.

Her door was open and as she approached, she heard voices inside. They were muted and unintelligible, like she was listening to them through water, but she recognized Carlisle's voice, then her father's.

Mustering every ounce of courage she possessed, Nessie entered her bedroom...and walked straight into a nightmare.

At first, all she could see of Jacob was his bare feet sticking out over the end of her too-small bed. But then her father, who stood at the edge of the bed with his back to the door, moved and Nessie caught a glimpse of Jacob's face.

His deathly pale, unconscious face.

"Jake..." she whispered.

Edward whipped around and when Nessie saw blood smeared on his shirt and hands, her overwhelming instinct was to race to Jacob's side.

"Nessie!" Her father caught her before she reached the bed. "Nessie, you shouldn't be here!"

Her stare was fixed on his bloody clothes. "What's...is he..?" She clutched Edward's arm for support. "Daddy...is Jake...?"

"He's alive," Edward soothed her. "And we're going to keep him that way. But you can't be in here, sweetheart."

She tried to shake her head, but her whole body was trembling so hard that the motion wasn't necessary. "Please?"

Her father shook his head and a second later she felt her grandmother's soft, cool hands prying her away from Edward. "It's going to be all right," Esme murmured into Nessie's ear as she walked her out of the bedroom and back down the stairs. "Jacob couldn't be in better hands. Everything is going to be okay, understand?"

But for once, she couldn't let herself believe her grandmother's words. Jacob's blood was all over the house, all over her bedroom. In what universe did that make sense?

And how could it ever be okay?

* * *

Rosalie reached the house only minutes after Nessie. "What happened?" she demanded as she climbed out of her Lexus. "Emmett? Bella?"

"We don't know much," Emmett answered when Bella couldn't. He took Rosalie's hand like he needed to hold it. "We were on our way home when Esme called us and told us to get here as quick as we could."

"When we did," Jasper continued, "Carlisle was upstairs. Edward was trying to read his thoughts and tell us what he was thinking, but after a minute, he just ran up to join him."

"Carlisle needed help." Alice's voice was tiny and delicate. "He decided...to operate, but he couldn't do it by himself."

"Operate?" Rosalie repeated. "Here?"

Emmett nodded gravely. "The only thing Edward told us was that Carlisle thought that Jacob was losing blood too fast and..." He stopped.

"And?" his wife demanded.

He sighed. "And that it was a miracle he was still alive at all."

Before Rosalie could reply, the door opened and Esme emerged, her arm wrapped firmly around Nessie's shaking shoulders. Without a word, Bella reached for her daughter. Shell-shocked, Nessie didn't fight against her mother's embrace.

"Esme, what happened?" Rosalie asked after she pulled their mother to the side, far enough away so that Nessie wouldn't overhear.

Looking around at the concerned faces of her adopted children, Esme let out a little breath she'd been storing in her lungs. "Carlisle and I were in his study when we heard the door open. We'd heard Jacob go out awhile earlier, so we just figured he was back. But then we smelled the blood..." She paused as if sorting out her memories. "He made it all the way up the stairs and into...into Nessie's room before we reached him. We found him there, naked...covered in blood...barely conscious."

"In Nessie's room?" Alice shook her head. "Why on earth did he...?"

Jasper cut her off gently. "Darlin'...he wanted to die there."

Esme's chin trembled at this, but she soldiered on. "All he said before he lost consciousness was 'newborn,' but we were already both thinking he'd been attacked. The blood...it was coming mostly from his neck." She closed her eyes for a second, wishing away the images. "Carlisle said an artery must have been nicked." Esme forced her eyes open. "He's upstairs now trying to repair it."

"A newborn?" Emmett's frown made his face frightening. "Around here?"

"It's happened before," Jasper reminded him. "We're all out of practice dealing with them, though. It's no wonder Jacob..." He let the thought go unspoken. "You and I should take a walk, Emmett. See what we can find."

"Are you out of your mind?" Rosalie hissed at her brother.

Alice pressed her cheek against her husband's arm. "Jazz, please stay here."

"Hey, we've been in battle with Jake before," Emmett told the women. "If that's what he looks like after the fight, I have no doubt we'll find this newborn in a dozen pieces."

His attempt at humor fell on deaf ears. In fact, Rosalie was just about to rip her husband a new one when she was again interrupted by the front door suddenly opening.

Edward stepped outside, still wearing Jacob's blood. Nessie jerked to attention and strained against her mother's arms.

"Jake?" she asked, her wet eyes pleading with her father for answers.

"He's going to be fine...but he needs blood." Edward looked at Bella. "And not just any blood."

Bella cleared her throat. "His sister Rachel is pregnant. Very pregnant, I think...so she can't. And his other sister lives too far away."

"Actually, Carlisle thinks it's not so much immediate family blood that he needs, but...his kind of blood." Edward paused. "Wolf blood."

After a second, his wife nodded and pressed a kiss against Nessie's temple before releasing her into Rosalie's waiting arms. "I'll call Sam."

Nessie heard everything, but it was too much, too terrible, too hard to comprehend. Tears flowed down her cheeks and she did nothing to stop them.

What if her father was lying? What if she lost Jacob? What if he died believing that she hated him?

It must have shocked the hell out of her aunt when Nessie suddenly started chuckling, but suddenly she couldn't get _Wuthering Heights_ out of her head.

_If he were annihilated..._

19th century literature had never seemed so relevant.

* * *

To Be Continued


	22. Chapter 22

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: This might make me sound evil, but I'm kind of glad that everyone's worried about Jake:) Thank you so much for all the incredible feedback; you make it very easy for me to keep writing.

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

Quil was the last to arrive at Sam's, having been delayed at Claire's house. For her tenth birthday, Claire had been given the chickenpox by a classmate at her birthday party, and only an order from his Alpha could compell Quil to tear himself away from his itchy, miserable imprintee.

Besides Leah, whose whereabouts were unknown, the only member of the pack who wasn't gathered in Sam's living room was Paul. He was still at the hospital with his wife and brand-new son, although now he was faced with the terrible job of telling Rachel that on the same day she became a mother, she just might lose her brother.

As Brady, Collin, Seth and Embry were all sprawled out on the furniture, Quil stood behind the couch next to Jared as Sam relayed the information he had received earlier from Bella Cullen, ending with her plea for a blood transfusion.

Shocked silence followed, but only for a second. Jared shattered it by abruptly slamming his way out of the house, presumably in case he phased in his anger and accidentally destroyed Emily's house.

"Jake should have stayed here." Embry was just as angry and worried as Jared, but he'd always been better at staying in control. "The leeches aren't good for him!" He leaned forward on his elbows, his fists tightly balled. "Does he have to die before he sees that?"

"He's not going to die," Seth said with absolute conviction. "Dr. Cullen won't let him." He stood up, ignoring the looks he always got whenever he defended the vampires. "I'll go, Sam. Jake can have as much of my blood as he needs."

Sam nodded curtly. "The Cullens are chartering a plane, so..."

"No." All heads turned towards Quil. He uncrossed his arms and went on in a tone that left no room for argument. "Seth, you can come with me, but it should be my blood. Jake's my cousin...family is always a better match."

To this, there was no disagreement.

After swinging by his own place just long enough to throw some clothes into an overnight bag, Quil stopped at Claire's on his way to the tiny Forks airport. The most important person in the world to him was covered in red spots and calamine lotion, sleeping fitfully through her fever.

"I'm so sorry." He kissed her too-hot forehead. "But I'll be back before you get scabby. Wouldn't want to miss that."

And the crazy thing about imprinting? He actually meant it.

* * *

While they waited for the helicopter to deliver Jacob's pack members, Emmett and Jasper went against their wives' wishes and headed into the woods to find out more about the attack.

It didn't take long.

The scent of blood drew them like a beacon to River Renesmee. There, at the water's edge, was a girl...or what had once been a girl.

Emmett made a mental note to congratulate Jacob when he woke up. Not only had he managed to separate the newborn from her right leg, he had mangled it so badly that there was no hope that she would ever reattach it and walk again.

The girl tried to scramble away from Jasper when he approached her, but besides her leg, she had a wolf-sized chuck of her shoulder missing, enough so that her arm dangled uselessly at her side.

"Stay away from me!" she shouted, her red eyes burning like fire.

Jasper stopped advancing on her, but knelt down to show that he wasn't going anywhere. "Are you alone?" She glared at him. "Who made you?" Jasper's own glare was deadly. "Answer me."

After a few seconds of warily studying his eyes, she asked, "You're...too?"

"Yes," Jasper confirmed.

Relief flashed across her impossibly young, blood-smeared face. "Can you help me?"

For a minute, Emmett wasn't entirely sure what his brother was going to say, but he held his tongue and waited. Eventually, Jasper stood up. "The man you attacked...he's part of our family."

"He was human!"

"Why did you attack him?"

Cradling her nearly-severed arm, the girl could only reply, "Just...because. He smelled bad, but I'm so thirsty..."

Jasper walked around behind the girl. Using his power, he relaxed her to the point where he was able to put his hands on either side of her head. "I know." With one twist, he snapped her neck, decapitating her.

Somewhere in the distance, an owl hooted in the dusk of twilight.

"Do you have your phone?" Without hesitation, Emmett produced it from his pocket. "Take a picture," Jasper told him. "Carlisle will want to try to identify her."

"We could've asked her name," Emmett mumbled as he snapped a photo of the girl's head.

"I'd rather not know it." Jasper took his lighter out. "She wasn't after anything but what we all want." He flicked it to life and threw it onto the girl's body, turning her into an instant bonfire. After tossing her leg onto the flames, Jasper and Emmett started the long walk back to the house.

* * *

"How is he alive?" Carlisle glanced up from the fresh bandage he was applying to the closing wound on Jacob's neck. On the other side of the bed, Edward stared down at the unconscious man. "I've been to medical school twice and that's once more than it takes to learn that when an artery is cut...or even just nicked...you have minutes at the most." Edward slowly shook his head. "Yet he made it back here."

"His body has already taken care of whatever venom might have gotten into his system. I'm certain that as soon as the bite was inflicted and the artery was hit, the healing process started." Carlisle paused to lay a hand on Jacob's cool forehead. "But his real strength lies in his incredible will to live."

Edward looked up at his father. "You're still worried, though."

A shadow crossed Carlisle's face. "He lost at least two pints of blood. Enough so that..." He trailed off, but the thought was still there in his mind for his son to read.

"How soon would we know if there was brain damage?" Edward quietly asked.

"The sooner we can tranfuse him, the better his odds." Carlisle stepped away from the bed. "Keeping monitoring his vital signs. I'm going to go wash up before they arrive."

When Carlisle was gone, Edward carefully sat down on the edge of the bed. In addition to the damaging bite, Jacob had suffered several broken bones which Edward, with Carlisle's help, had set in order to heal properly.

But his father assured him that Jacob wasn't in any pain, thanks to an incredibly high dose of morphine. Still, that would be little comfort to Bella and Nessie and probably even less to Jacob's pack when they arrived.

As if she was the mind-reader instead of him, Bella suddenly appeared in the doorway. Edward stood as his wife entered, her hand pressed against her mouth, her eyes fixed on Jacob.

"Where's Nessie?" Edward frowned when she said nothing. "Bella?"

She let her hand drift down to her throat in order to answer, "She's with Rosalie and Alice. Edward..." If she'd been able to cry, her eyes would have been flooded with tears. "Please tell me he's going to be all right."

Although she couldn't produce the effects that came with crying, when Edward went to her and gathered her up in his arms, Bella's shoulders shook with dry sobs.

"Don't imagine for a moment that I'm going to let him die before I get to fight with him at least one more time," he tried to joke. Kissing her hair, Edward held her tighter. "I promised Nessie that he would live. And I've let my daughter down enough lately, don't you think?"

Bella pulled back just enough to look up at him. "She wants to see him."

"Not like this," Edward decided. Bella stared at him. "You want her to see him like this?"

"I want her to have the choice, Edward." She pushed away from him. "Why can't you get that we can't make decisions for her anymore? We can give her advice and we can be there for her no matter what happens, but her life is all up to her now." She gripped her husband's arms. "If you keep trying to choose for her, you will lose her."

Edward lowered his eyes for a long time. When he finally looked up, Bella knew that, at least for the moment, his heart had overcome his head. "Just...give me a minute. To get him into some pants," he added when Bella arched an eyebrow. "Bella, he's naked under that sheet."

She pursed her lips to hide her smile. "You are so ridiculously Victorian."

* * *

It had been a tactical mistake to phase back into his normal body, but when the bloodsucker had gotten her arms around him, every instinct screamed at him to get away. Remembering the excruciating pain of having his bones shattered during his last battle with a newborn, Jacob had acted on his instinct, using the sudden shift in his body mass in order to slip out of her grasp.

He'd gone for the leg he'd ripped away from her and achieved his goal of destroying it, but he hadn't been able to phase back before she grabbed him with her good arm and sank her teeth into his neck.

The pain had been a thousand times worse than any broken bone. Bleeding badly, all Jacob could think to do was to run. Every step back to the Cullen's house had been harder to take than the one before. Eventually, it took everything he had just to climb the stairs.

And that was when he knew...he was going to die.

Nessie's room lay open; he reached it just as everything started to turn black. The last thing he smelled was apple blossoms and fresh air. He thought he heard someone shouting his name and he might have said something to them, but it might have been nothing more than his imagination.

The pain was gone. Everything was quiet. Still. Peaceful. The black emptiness was like a warm blanket wrapped around him. If this was the Great Beyond that awaited fallen Quileute warriors, Jacob wasn't sure what he'd done to deserve it, but it was everything they had been promised by the elders.

_Jake?_

Her voice pierced the darkness. Now he was sure that he was in heaven.

_Please..._

Something touched his arm, then his cheek...and something even softer brushed across his lips. The scent of apples grew stronger. He inhaled deeply.

_Please don't go, Jake. You promised...you'd always be there..._

There was light in the darkness. He could hear more sounds, the rustle of cloth, a faint sniff...his own heart beating slowly...too slowly in his chest.

_You have to know that I love..._

The black faded away just as quickly as it had enveloped him. Everything was hazy, but he would have known who was sitting by his side even if he'd been blind.

Fresh tears spilled down Nessie's cheeks as Jacob struggled to keep his eyes open. "Don't try to talk," she whispered. Her smile was that of an angel, surrounding him with warmth as she threaded her fingers through his. "We'll have time for that later."

Bolstered by that thought, Jacob let the morphine take him away again, knowing that as long as she kept holding his hand, he would be able to find his way back.

* * *

To Be Continued


	23. Chapter 23

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: I was a little scared about this chapter getting out. I had some computer issues which may or may not be cleared up now. Time will tell. However, I hope you enjoy the chapter and thank you so much for all the wonderful feedback!

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

Seth and Quil arrived well after dark, far earlier than they would have if they'd driven, but later than Carlisle would have liked. Jacob's blood pressure had dropped to worrying levels, a fact of which only Edward was aware, as Carlisle had been unwilling to say anything out loud in front of Nessie.

Ever since she'd been allowed in her room, Nessie hadn't left Jacob's side for so much as a second and the only times she let go of his hand were when her grandfather came in to check on him.

Even the commotion of Seth and Quil's arrival couldn't pull her away. She just patiently waited for the two men to be led upstairs. When they finally entered the room, Nessie stood up, keeping her fingers laced through Jacob's cold ones.

"Hey, Nessie," Seth greeted her with grin that was tempered by his concern for Jacob's deathly pallor.

"Hi, Seth." She looked at his companion. "And Quil, right?"

Quil said nothing; his face was fixed in a grimace as he looked his cousin over for any visible injuries.

It was up to Seth to fill the silence. "So...when did you go and grow up on us?" he asked Nessie.

Her chin trembled as she tried to smile. "I guess when nobody was looking."

* * *

"This might sting, but you shouldn't feel too much." After checking the strength of the tourniquet around Quil's muscular upper arm, Edward slid the needle into his vein. Dark red blood filled the plastic tube that led down into an empty bag.

Quil looked down at his blood as it left his body. "Does it make you hungry? Seeing it like this?"

Edward smiled ruefully. "The wet-dog stench tends to put off our appetites." He paused on the pretense of adjusting the tubing. "I want to thank you for coming so quickly."

"Jake is family. Real family." As instructed, Quil squeezed the rubber ball Edward had placed in his hand, in order to keep the blood flowing. "What happened to him? There's a bandage on his neck." The ball crumpled under the pressure of his fist. "Was he bitten?"

"You have to relax." When Quil just glared at him, Edward sighed. "Yes. He ran into a newborn in the woods. I'm assured it was a random encounter." Quil cursed under his breath. "He won't change. Any venom would have..."

Quil cut him off. "I know how it works."

They sat in silence for a few minutes as the bag slowly filled.

"It's good that Claire has the chickenpox now," Edward suddenly said. "After twelve, it's a much more serious condition."

Quil blinked, then scowled. "I forgot about your parlor trick."

"My apologies," Edward murmured. "Your thoughts were very...loud." A moment passed. "May I ask you something?" Quil lifted his shoulder which Edward took as a sign to go on. "Do you ever think about the day when Claire will be an adult?"

"Nope."

The vampire raised an eyebrow at this. "Really?"

Quil snorted. "Look, I wouldn't expect you to get imprinting. You can't, really, unless it's happened to you. And even then it's still different for everyone."

Edward nodded thoughtfully. "I see. Sam imprinted on his wife when she was older...and they became lovers right away."

"Hey!" Quil was indignant. "The only reason I know that is because Sam couldn't keep from thinking it, so it's not cool for you to go repeating it just because you heard it in my head!"

"You're absolutely right and, again, I apologize." Edward paused. "I'm just trying to understand."

"Because of Jake and Nessie?"

Clearing his throat, Edward looked at the bag. "That should be enough."

Quil watched the vampire seal off the bag of blood and remove the needle from his vein. "You know...when Jake came back before Christmas...before Leah...he was already torturing himself over Nessie."

Edward placed a sterile cotton pad in the crook of Quil's arm and bent it back to keep pressure on the puncture site. "Do you feel dizzy or nauseated?"

"He felt like a pervert," Quil went on, ignoring him. "He was so pissed off at himself for even thinking about her like that. But the girl I just saw across the hall isn't a little kid anymore. So...what the hell was he freaking out about?"

Taking the full bag off the rack, Edward started for the door. "Don't try to stand. I'll send someone up with some juice."

"You said you wanted to understand." Quil waited for Edward to glance back at him. "But you don't really...do you?"

"I understand imprinting more than you think I'm capable of," Edward replied. "I had my own destiny. She's downstairs right now, worrying about Jacob."

"Claire isn't my destiny." Quil shrugged. "She's the one thing that makes the entire, stupid world make sense."

"Like I said...I get it." Edward opened the door. "You have, what, another ten years of waiting ahead of you? Will you be with another woman during that time?" When Quil said nothing, Edward inclined his chin. "Rest for a few minutes. We'll know if this worked soon enough."

* * *

Armed with a bucket of diluted bleach, Bella took it upon herself to erase Jacob's bloodstains from the wood and tile floors that he had crossed. The carpets, however, would have to be replaced.

As she wiped the blood away, Bella tried to remember the first time she'd met Jacob. They'd both been so very young, innocent of all sins, ignorant of their own supernatural fates.

Of course, she'd chosen hers. Jacob hadn't. Neither had Nessie, for that matter.

No wonder the universe had drawn them together.

"Do you want some help?"

Shaking a loose strand of hair out of her eyes, Bella looked up at Rosalie. "Are you seriously offering to help me scrub the floor?"

"Well, if you want to do it all by yourself..."

Bella dipped her sponge back into the bucket. "Whatever, Rosalie."

Her adopted sister hesitated, but made no motion to walk away. "I talked to Nessie this afternoon. Before all of...this."

"Okay," Bella said after a moment. "You either really want to tell me something or you don't want to, but you feel like you have to and you're not happy about it."

"Maybe it's a little bit of both." Perched on the edge of a nearby chair, she watched Bella work for a few seconds. "She's angry with you and Edward for arranging her meeting with Nahuel."

"I didn't..." Nessie's mother gave up with a sigh. "Maybe I did."

"I know he did," Rosalie snorted. "That is so Edward, thinking he can move everybody around his chess board just because he can read our damn minds."

Bella came to her husband's defense. "He's not a puppet-master! He just...sometimes he doesn't stop and...think things through before he acts." She pointed a finger at her sister. "But what he does, he does out of love and genuine caring, which is more than most of us can say."

"Nessie needs to know that. Right now, I think she just feels like her parents tried to replace one guy in her life with another. Without asking her what she wanted."

"We have issues with that," Bella admitted. "We're working on it." Another long moment passed. "What would you do? If she was your daughter?"

Rosalie let out the tiniest breath. "I guess...I would listen to her and really try to hear her."

Bella tried to laugh, but it came out choked. "She's not talking to me, remember?"

"She will. After today...she'll need her mother." Rosalie stood up. "You missed a spot over there. What?" she asked when Bella frowned. "I'm helping."

* * *

At dawn, Carlisle took Jacob's blood pressure. While still low, it was back within acceptable limits. Some color had returned to his skin and he was breathing easier.

He had just started to listen to his patient's heart when Nessie, who had fallen asleep with her cheek on Jacob's arm, woke up with a start.

"Jake! "

Carlisle touched her head. "Shh, he's doing well, Nessie." He pulled off his stethoscope and handed it to her. "Listen for yourself."

Her hands trembled as she placed the bell over Jacob's heart. The beat she heard was strong; her shoulders immediately relaxed.

"We've only given him three-quarters of the unit that Quil donated so far, but already he's showing remarkable improvement. I don't want to say he's out of the woods prematurely, but I'm very optimistic."

Hearing this from her grandfather brought fresh tears to Nessie's eyes. "I was really scared, Grandpa," she whispered. "He almost..." She struggled for breath. "He could have..."

Carlisle recognized the signs of an oncoming panic attack and there was only one person he could think to bring to the girl.

"Bella," he called down the hallway. Within seconds, his daughter-in-law appeared from the bedroom she shared with Edward. Carlisle said nothing further; he just indicated the bed where Nessie had crumpled under the crushing weight of her relief and lingering fear.

When Bella tried to pry Nessie from Jacob in order to hold her, she fully expected to be pushed away. But Nessie clung to her mother, wetting the shoulder of her shirt with her tears.

"It's okay, sweetheart," Bella said as she stroked her daughter's hair and struggled to keep her voice calm and steady. "Everything is going to be fine now."

Nessie shook her head. "No...you don't know..." She turned her face away, like she couldn't bear to be seen. "I am still...so mad at him!"

After giving her a moment to recover from this, Bella gently set her at arm's length, but Nessie refused to meet her eyes. "If you're ready," Bella forged on, "I promise I will listen to whatever you have to say."

A minute ticked by before Nessie began to talk.

* * *

To Be Continued


	24. Chapter 24

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: Thank you so much for everything:) Hearing that you're enjoying the story makes me so very happy. I hope you keep enjoying it!

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

By the time Nessie finished telling her mother everything that had happened between her and Nahuel in Rio, the sun had started to rise over the eastern edge of the forest, filling the bedroom with soft orange light which turned her tangled bronze hair into twisted rivers of fire.

"Maybe I should have stayed in the cabana." Nessie looked down at Jacob as he slept on, blissfully unaware. "If I'd slept with Nahuel..."

Bella reached for her daughter's hand when she didn't finish the thought. "How do you think that would have made you feel?"

Nessie shook off the question. "I get that two wrongs don't make a right. But I want Jake to know how much he hurt me, Mom," she whispered. Her voice grew stronger with anger. "I want him to have to feel what I feel every time I think about him and Leah Clearwater."

"Nessie, I can't pretend to understand what you're going through," Bella began after a few heavy seconds of silence. "I've never been hurt like this before." She paused. "But I have been hurt, deeply hurt, by the man I love."

"Not Dad." When her mother said nothing, Nessie blinked. "What did Dad do?"

"It's a very long story," Bella said ruefully. "But basically...he left me. He told me he didn't love me and he disappeared. He even took away all the pictures I had of him. Like he'd never existed."

"Why?"

"Everyone has reasons for their choices, honey, and they all seem perfectly reasonable when the choice is being made." She tucked a lock of hair behind her daughter's ear. "Edward thought that the best way to keep me safe was to take himself out of my life."

"Jake told me that he..." Nessie couldn't form the words. "...with her...because he didn't want to think about me." She closed her eyes. "Mom, the whole time I was with Nahuel, all I was thinking about was Jake."

Bella nodded. "And when your father left me, my life stopped." She debated telling her daughter about Jacob's role in bringing her back to life, but decided that could wait for another day. "What can I say, honey? Boys are stupid."

Nessie's chin wobbled as she tried to smile at that. "It's like...I'm being eaten up inside. Being mad at him almost hurts worse than knowing he slept with someone else. Because there is nothing...absolutely nothing I can do about it."

"There is one thing." Bella clasped Nessie's hand between hers and squeezed lightly. "It's the only thing that made me feel better when your father and I were back together again."

"What's that?" Nessie sniffed.

"I decided to forgive him."

* * *

As dawn turned into morning, Esme and Alice worked together to fix a massive breakfast of pancakes, sausage, eggs and fresh fruit salad for their guests. Alice had just finished pouring orange juice into two crystal goblets when Seth, having been lured out of bed by the delicious scents from the kitchen, wandered into the dining room.

"Morning," he greeted them with a lopsided smile. "How's Jake?"

"Much better," Esme assured him as she started serving up a plate of food. "Carlisle says he's responding well to the transfusion."

Relieved by this, Seth nodded and turned his attention to the feast laid out on the table. "Is all of this for me and Quil?"

"You won't have to fight any of us for it," Alice winked. "Where is Quil?"

"On the phone with Claire." Mindful of his long, gangly limbs, Seth cautiously sat down on one of Esme's antique chairs. "She's got chickenpox and it's totally killing him not to be there for her. But...you know...Jake's worse off."

Esme set the heavy plate in front of him. "Claire is his...?"

"Yeah," Seth confirmed as he cut into a sausage patty. "His Nessie."

Alice slid into the seat next to him and propped her chin up on her hand in order to watch him eat. "Do you have a Nessie, Seth?"

"Alice, really," Esme gently chided her daughter.

But Seth just swallowed and shook his head. "Nah, I haven't imprinted on anyone yet." He reached for the jar of syrup and doused his pancakes.

"How do you feel about that?" Alice asked, earning her another look from Esme.

"Actually..." Seth shrugged as he chewed. "I'm kind of okay with it." The vampires waited for him to finish off a chunk of melon. "Imprinting is pretty heavy," he declared. "I mean, once it happens...that's it. You're part of something for the rest of your life, you know? Something you didn't really pick for yourself."

Esme sat down on his other side. "I never thought about it that way."

"Well, nobody does...at least not once they've imprinted. I remember when Jake thought the whole thing was a crock of..." He stopped himself just in time, blushing furiously to the women's amusement. "But then Nessie was born and it all changed for him." Seth's dimples flashed. "Guess it will for me someday, too."

"It will." Quil entered the dining room with far more trepidation than Seth had. Studiously avoiding looking at the spread on the table, he cleared his throat. "You didn't have to go to all this trouble for us."

Esme's smile chipped away at his invisible wall. "It wasn't any trouble at all. Please." She indicated the empty chairs. "Sit down and help yourself, Quil."

If his stomach hadn't betrayed him by loudly rumbling right then, he might have refused her invitation. As it was, he sat down, but only put a pancake, a spoonful of eggs and a sausage patty onto his plate.

Seth shook his head as he dug into his own mountain of eggs. "Dude, don't be an idiot. Just because they don't eat doesn't mean they can't cook." He glanced at Esme. "Sorry 'bout him. He's got imprint-itis."

Alice smothered a giggle in the palm of her hand. "Sounds painful."

"Oh, it is," Seth agreed, ignorning the glare Quil threw at him. "Makes a usually nice and normal guy turn into a..."

"Can it, Seth," Quil growled. But he took a second helping and served himself a bowl of fruit. "Is Jake awake yet?"

Esme shook her head. "But he's improving. The transfusion helped a lot." She paused. "I understand Jacob is your cousin."

"Yeah." Quil took a sip of juice. "But any one of us would have done it for him."

Seth nodded emphatically. "We're pretty much brothers by now." He wiped his mouth on a linen napkin. "Do you think we'll be able to see him today?"

"He needs to be with his family."

Quil's words seemed to echo off the dining room walls. Alice sat up straighter, a wounded expression on her perfect face. Seth winced before turning a glare of his own onto his packmate.

But Esme, with her infinite understanding, patience and forgiveness, offered Quil a warm smile. "Jacob's very lucky to have people who care so much about him. I know he'll be glad to see you."

To his credit, Quil refused to meet her sympathetic eyes, as if he knew he'd gone too far. "We just..."

"Hey, don't speak for me," Seth warned him.

Quil tried again. "It's been hard to watch him the past couple of months. First he was sick and then he wouldn't get off Sam's couch and now he's..."

"He was sick?" Alice asked.

Seth confirmed this with a reluctant nod. "When he came back. The second time."

"We didn't know that," Esme said softly. "What was wrong with him?"

"Nothing much. Just a broken heart." Quil pushed his fork through the food on his plate. "We're not supposed to be away from our imprints."

Seth broke the silence that followed. "We're also not supposed to cheat on them." Quil let the fork drop with a clatter. "Yeah, I really just said that," Seth defended himself. "Funny that I'm the only one who can, since I'm the only one who doesn't know what imprinting feels like." He paused. "But I know that when it happens to me...I'm never gonna look at another girl afterwards."

"You're also never gonna be seduced by your sister," Quil muttered.

When Seth fell quiet, Esme delicately cleared her throat. "I think Alice and I should start on the dishes while..."

Seth cut her off. "Since I just got through saying how you're my brother, Quil, I'm letting that one slide. But the next time you blame my sister for a mistake that was only half hers, I won't. Got it?"

Alice dared to speak after a few seconds of heavy silence. "You know...I've always been kind of glad when I make a mistake. Even a big one."

Esme let out a breathless sigh. "Alice, perhaps now isn't the best time for..."

Once again, she was interrupted as her daughter went on. "To err is human, right? Well...I can't remember being human." Her smile was cheerful even as she admitted this. "But I have definitely erred." She lowered her voice, as if confiding a great secret. "I used to wear acid-washed jeans."

Having succeeded in getting Seth to crack a smile, Alice continued, "It's so easy for us...and I'm not just talking about us as in vampires, here...it's so easy for all of us to forget who we used to be." She glanced back and forth between the two shapeshifters. "In a lot of ways, we're better than everyone else...until we make a mistake. Then we remember that we're not anywhere near perfect." She met Esme's eyes. "We remember that the only monster we've ever truly been...is human."

Quil's Adam's apple bobbed. "I'm sorry," he said a second later. The apology wasn't specific, but it was enough for all three of them. "The food's really good," he added. "Thanks."

Esme scooped more eggs and sausage onto Quil's plate. "Just wait until you see what I have planned for lunch."

* * *

"Just like that?" Her daughter's question was so quiet that only a vampire could have heard it. "After what Dad did...you just forgave him?"

Bella inclined her chin. "And I can't tell you how much better I felt after I did."

Nessie pulled her hand back slowly. "Dad didn't do what Jake did."

"No," her mother agreed. "What he did was worse. He left me, after promising that he never would, and he forced the whole family to leave, too. Alice and Esme and Carlisle...all the people I'd come to think of as family...he ripped them away from me without even letting me say goodbye."

A minute ticked by. In the bed, Jacob's leg twitched, like he was lost in a nightmare.

"But you forgave him," Nessie said doubtfully.

"I forgave him," Bella repeated. "Because I love him." She paused. "Everyone has a different definition of love, Nessie, but for me...it's forgiveness."

"I love Jake," she whispered.

Bella smiled softly. "I know."

"But if I forgive him...won't I be saying that what he did was okay?" Nessie jerked her head from side to side. "I don't think I can do that, Mom. It wasn't okay. It'll never be okay!"

"It'll also never change," Bella reminded her. "And it won't ever go away. So, what are you going to do? Carry around all that anger that you just said was eating you up inside forever? Could you really live like that?"

Nessie blinked back tears. "I don't know. I don't..." She closed her eyes and tears spilled down her cheeks. "No. I don't want to be angry anymore."

"Then..." Bella shifted closed to her daughter and put an arm around her shoulders. "I think you know what you need to do." She pressed a kiss to Nessie's forehead. "And after that, maybe you could try to forgive me and your father for meddling in your life too much."

Nessie leaned into her mother. "Only if you forgive me for being a brat the past couple of days."

"Oh, nudger," Bella murmured, squeezing her tighter. "Already done."

* * *

After leaving Nessie's side in order to give her some time to think, Bella sought out her husband. It wasn't hard to find him; she just followed the staccato sounds of fledgling piano notes until she reached the music room.

Edward had a pencil between his teeth and a growing hill of crumpled papers around his feet. In between notes, he would scribble something onto the sheet propped up in front of him and then test out the new combination, only to ball up the paper and start over again.

Bella watched him for ten minutes before he noticed her standing in the doorway.

"I can't get the melody right," he told her, running a hand through his messy locks. "It's just not working."

She approached the piano and lowered herself onto the bench beside him. "What is it?"

"Just a piece that came to me during the night." He banged out a chord before letting his hand drop back into his lap. "Is love destiny or something more?"

"I already know what love is." Bella laid her cheek onto his shoulder. "You know how I told you that it would be decades before the bad mark got stricken from your record?"

He snorted softly. "I remember. And I deserve it, Bella."

She turned her face into his shirt and inhaled the clean scent of laundry and Edward. "Consider it stricken." Bella lifted her head in order to kiss the corner of his mouth. "I love you."

Edward was still puzzled, but he welcomed her second, longer kiss. "I love you, too."

Smiling, she turned her attention to the piano. "Show me what you have so far. I can't really help, but..."

"You help, Bella, just by being here. You've always been my inspiration." With that, Edward laid his long fingers onto the keys and let the notes flow.

* * *

Back upstairs, Nessie watched Jacob sleep through a film of hot tears. Her thoughts were torn, her soul was bruised, but her heart knew what it needed.

She touched his cheek and stroked it gently until his eyes slowly opened.

"Ness," he murmured through dry lips. "Hey."

"Hey," she whispered. "Seth and Quil are here. Do you want me to get them?"

Jacob rocked his head ever so slightly back and forth against the pillows. "Stay?"

"I'm not going anywhere," Nessie promised. "I have to tell you something important." His eyelids were already drooping as he slipped back into sleep. She smiled as she reached for his hand again. The hauntingly beautiful sound of her father's music filled the room.

Nessie brushed her lips over his knuckles. "But it can wait for now."

* * *

To Be Continued


	25. Chapter 25

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: I'm sorry this chapter took so long to get out, but life kind of tackled me to the ground and it took awhile to get back on my feet. Oh, and I had a birthday, which was fun, but distracting.

But I hope you enjoy and thank you so much for sticking with the story!

Oh and special thanks to Robmau, without whom this chapter never would have been posted. Thank you for the tech advice and all your kind reviews!:)

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

Forty-eight hours after encountering the newborn in the woods, Jacob woke from a dream about Nessie...only to find Quil and Seth staring down at him.

"Look who decided to quit faking sick." Seth poked his shoulder with a grin. "Wakey-wakey, Jakey-Jakey!"

Quil rubbed away a twitch in his temple. "Really, dude? Really?"

Jacob frowned as he struggled to sit up. "Nessie?" he asked, gritting his teeth against the pain that lingered in his recently-broken bones.

"Bella, Alice and Rosalie finally talked her into taking a shower and getting something to eat," Seth said. "It wasn't easy. She's been in here ever since we got here."

Exhausted from the effort it took just to pull himself into a sitting position, Jacob slumped back against the headboard. "Why?"

Quil and Seth exchanged a look. "Jake...what do you remember?" Quil asked.

He closed his eyes. "Vamp. Newborn." His muscles clenched. "Couldn't get her off of me." His eyes opened slowly. "Blood...everywhere."

"You nearly died," Seth informed him. Quil kicked his foot. "What? He has a right to know."

Shaking his head, Quil looked at his cousin. "You're gonna be fine. Doc says the transfusion worked better than he'd hoped."

"Transfusion?" Jacob looked back and forth between them. "Which one of you...?"

"Doesn't matter," Quil declared. "You would have done the same for any of us."

With a silent sigh of understanding, Jacob laid his head back against the carved wood of the headboard. "Thanks. I owe you one."

"Shut up," Quil told him with gruff affection. "You don't owe us shit." He cleared his throat. "Seriously, we're just glad you hung on, Jake."

A moment passed before Seth added, "So is Nessie."

Jacob swallowed heavily and winced at the stab of pain from the healing wound on his neck. "She hates me."

"No way." Seth folded his arms. "She might be mad at you, but it took three vampires to get her to leave your side, man. Nessie doesn't hate you."

"You don't get it, Seth." The more he talked, the stronger he got, yet he was still weak as evidenced by the effort it took to move his head back and forth. "But even if you're right..." Jacob closed his eyes again. "She should hate me."

"You know, I didn't leave Claire during the chickenpox, fly all the way here, and spend the last two days smelling vampire stink just to watch you throw yourself a damn pity party," Quil scowled.

"Great bedside manner," Jacob muttered. His cousin flipped him a casual finger. "If you'd hurt Claire...the way I hurt Nessie..."

When it became clear that he wasn't going to finish the thought, Quil looked at Seth. "Give us a minute?"

Seth rolled his eyes, but did as he was asked. "Gee, can't wait 'til I imprint so I can stay up with the big kids." For emphasis, he slammed the door shut behind him with more force than necessary.

Jacob broke the silence that followed. "Claire has chickenpox?"

"And her mom's terrified she's gonna scratch and leave scars." As he talked, Quil wandered over to Nessie's dresser and the framed pictures that decorated it. "Like that would matter." He paused as he studied the images of Jacob, Nessie and the Cullens. "She'll always be perfect to me."

"Yeah," Jacob echoed.

Quil looked back at him. "You're right about Seth not getting it. He thinks that once you imprint, you never look at anyone else ever again. But we know that's not true...right?"

At the same time, with the syncronicity that only came from having grown up together, they said in perfect unison, "Megan Fox."

Jacob looked away first, but now there was a small smile playing on his lips. It slowly died, though, the longer he stared off blankly. "I did more than just look. And I did it with Leah. With Leah, Quil!" His fists balled up against the sheets. "What the hell is wrong with me?"

"You gotta let it go."

"I would love to," he mumbled. "How do I do that again?"

Quil snorted. "Do I look like your fucking spirit guide? I don't know, Jake," he went on when a look of agony spread across his cousin's face. "Put it behind you. Move forward. Forgive yourself. Learn to embrace the now. Just do it!"

"You know what I just realized?" Jacob said a minute later. "I have your blood in my veins now." He frowned. "I think I can feel my brain cells dying."

Again, Quil snorted, but this time in laughter. "Screw you. If you're feeling good enough to be a dick, then I think it's time I head back to..."

There was a light knock on the door just then. A second later, before either of them could respond, the door opened and Nessie entered her bedroom.

She let out a little gasp of happy surprise upon seeing Jacob awake. Jacob instantly tried to sit up straighter, but exhaustion and pain kept him from moving too much. Still, their eyes met, stares locked.

And Quil suddenly felt like the worst kind of third wheel.

"Hey, Nessie," he said on his way out the door. The girl only acknowledged him by turning her head slighly towards him. She never looked away from Jacob. "Go easy on him, would you?" Quil asked her. "I know he's an idiot, but we try not to hold it against him. Maybe you can do the same?"

Without waiting for a reply from either of them, Quil slipped out of the room and closed the door behind him. Grinning, he went in search of his phone. It had been at least an hour since he'd called to check on Claire.

* * *

"Quil's right." Jacob's voice sliced through the silence. "I'm an idiot." Unable to bear the lost look in his eyes anymore, Nessie turned her head away from him.

He swallowed heavily as he watched her search for a safe place to look, even more convinced now that Seth was wrong and that he was the last person Nessie wanted to be around. Sure, she had kept watch over him and made sure he didn't die, but that was only because she had the most beautiful and tender heart of anyone he'd ever known. She would have done the same thing if he'd been a stranger or a sworn enemy.

"I'm going to go back to the res with the guys," Nessie's head snapped up, but by then Jacob was staring at his hands and didn't see her reaction. "As soon as Carlisle says it's okay...I'll leave. And I promise..." His throat closed up without warning. "I won't hurt you ever again, Nessie."

The silence that followed hurt worse than having his throat nearly ripped out by vampire. But when Nessie started chuckling...somehow that felt a hundred times worse.

"I cannot tell you," she began, shaking her head, "just how sick and tired I am of everyone in my life deciding that they know what I need better than I do."

Jacob frowned. "I'm only trying to make things easier for you. I thought..."

"That's the problem," Nessie cut him off, all amusement gone. "You thought, you made a decision...and now not only am I supposed to live with it, but I'm supposed to be happier for it." She took a step towards the bed. "But here's what you didn't do, Jake, and it's the reason I'm not arguing the fact that you really are kind of an idiot." She paused. "You didn't ask me what I thought. Just like my father didn't and my mother didn't and Nahuel..."

Her abrupt silence made Jacob's imagination run wild. "What about him?"

Nessie jerked her shoulder. "It's nothing."

But he wasn't buying it. "The hell it isn't!" Jacob struggled even harder to sit up all the way. "What happened with him, Nessie?" She folded her arms tightly across her chest, as if protecting a great secret. "If he hurt you, I swear..." Jacob could feel Quil's blood boiling in his veins. "Just tell me...what did he do to you?"

"Everything that you wouldn't!"

Never, in all the years he'd known and loved her, had Nessie ever yelled at him before. The tone of her voice took him by surprise so much that the implication in her words didn't catch up to him until a few minutes later.

"I'm sorry," she finally said. "Jake, I didn't..."

It explained everything. It was his worst nightmare come to life. Unable to form any coherent sentences when his mind was filled with gut-stabbing images of Nahuel and Nessie together, Jacob just held up his hand for her to stop. There was no triumph in her expression when he was finally able to look at her. Just regret and guilt.

Again, somehow that was much worse.

"So," Jacob started, drawing on every ounce of his diminished strength in order to keep his tone cool and neutral. "We're even, then?"

Nessie's chin trembled. "Jake, Nahuel and I..."

"If I promise to never mention Leah around you again," Jacob cut her off, "can I ask that you never talk about him around me?" He took the lowering of her lashes as a yes. His shoulders relaxed against the headboard, yet every muscle in his body remained taut. "Are we good, Nessie?"

Tears gathered in the corners of her eyes. "I don't know. Are we?"

"You decide." He took a breath. "Do you want me to leave?"

Without hesitation, she shook her head. "I never wanted you to leave." Nessie blinked up at the ceiling. "None of this should have ever happened," she whispered. "If you just would have..."

"Stayed?" he finished for her.

"Loved me back."

After a long time had passed between them, Jacob let out his pent-up breath. "Nessie...I might be an idiot, but I'm a damn lucky one. Know why?" He answered his own question, "Some men spend their whole lives trying to figure out why they were born. I figured it out when I was seventeen." He looked her straight in the eye. "I was put on this earth to love you."

"Up until now, I have done a shitty job of showing you that," Jacob went on a second later. "I was stupid and I was confused and I made some huge mistakes. But from now on...you will know every day that I love you."

"Jake..."

Once more, he quieted her, this time by asking for her hand. She tentatively touched her fingers to his, surprised at the warmth of his skin after so many hours of deathly cold. "It was never about me loving you, Nessie. Never. I have loved you as a brother, as a friend, as a guardian...and when I realized that I loved you as a man..."

The barest hint of a smile colored her cheeks. "You freaked?"

"That's one way of putting it."

Nessie looked down at their joined hands. "Jake, I need you to know that Nahuel..."

"It doesn't matter," he insisted. "It only matters if you love him." He frowned suddenly. "Nessie, do you...?"

"I care about him," she murmured. "But I barely know him."

It wasn't exactly an answer that was going to help him sleep at night, but it was the best Jacob figured he could hope for. After all, it had been no one's mistakes but his own that had driven Nessie into Nahuel's arms. And even if the bastard had been the first to make love to her, Jacob was determined to be the last.

He hadn't realized that he'd closed his eyes until he felt Nessie pull her hand away. The loss of contact made him want to reach for her, but she was already too far away.

"I'm sorry. I should let you rest." Backing away from the bed, Nessie flashed him a half-hearted smile. "Unless you're hungry. I could bring you some soup or something."

Right then, he wanted whatever would bring her back to him as quickly as possible. "Soup would be great."

After giving him another smile, Nessie slipped out of the room and firmly closed the door behind her. Resting her forehead on the wood frame, she shut her eyes in self-loathing.

Why had she done it? Why had she lied? Why hadn't she shouted at the top of her lungs that she most certainly had not had sex with Nahuel the moment she realized what she'd said?

How the hell could she claim to have forgiven Jacob only to turn around and make him suffer?

* * *

Thousands of miles away, Zafrina set a steaming bowl of stew in front of her half-human guest only to watch him push it away a second later.

"To my knowledge, Senna has not changed the recipe," she told him. "She will worry if you do not eat."

"I am sure it is delicious," Nahuel said, "but I cannot."

"Someone else ate this very dish in this very kitchen not so long ago," Zafrina mused. "Perhaps she is the reason your appetite has changed?"

"Why did she leave?" His eyes grew dark with confused anger. "Tell me why, Zafrina!"

"Alice told us that they were sick for home. She missed her family. Nothing more than this."

Nahuel shook his head. "It was more. I upset her. I moved too fast, too soon." He bent the spoon in his hand under the crushing pressure of his fist. "It was my fault."

Zafrina looked back and forth between him and the spoon. "Do you intend to do something about it or do you wish to ruin all of my spoons? You are the only one who uses them, you know."

"What can I do? What is there for me to do?"

"Do you no longer believe she is your destiny?" After a moment, Zafrina added, "Go to her."

Nahuel sighed as if he had already considered this and dismissed it. "She does not want me."

"She is very young. She does not know what she wants."

"Or she does and I am not it." Nahuel looked down at the bent metal in his hands. "My Renesemee...I would give anything to see her one more time."

Zafrina cursed in her native tongue. "You men are all ridiculous!" she chastised him, but not without a fair amount of familial amusement. "Go to her, do not go to her...the choice is yours. Either way, do not mope about my house as if you are the star of a television drama!" Throwing back her wild hair, she strode towards the living room, but paused at the door to add, "You will live forever. Would you really never know for certain?"

A long time after she left, Nahuel slipped his phone out of his pocket and dialed information. "Manuas Airport," he told the operator. "Ticket information."

* * *

To Be Continued


	26. Chapter 26

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: Oh my gosh...this chapter was like pulling teeth! No idea why, but I hope it's not complete crap:) I've had a crazy month; hasn't it been a crazy month? Anyway, thank you so much for your patience and for caring enough about this story to keep asking for the next update:)

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

Jacob had drifted back to sleep by the time Nessie delivered his requested soup. Rather than wake him, she quietly set the tray on the nightstand and sank down to her knees beside the bed.

No matter how many times she'd studied his face while he was sleeping, she never got over how angelic he looked when he was lost in his dreams. She wanted to stroke his cheek and touch her lips to his, but she also wouldn't have woken him up for the world. It was enough, for the time being, just to sit next to him.

"Nessie."

She didn't have to turn around to know that her uncle had appeared in the opend doorway, but out of courtesy, Nessie turned her head towards him. "Hey."

Jasper stepped inside, immediately followed by the unmistakable bulk of her other uncle. After flashing Emmett a brief smile, Nessie turned her attention back to Jacob.

The men exchanged a glance before Jasper cleared his throat. "We're going into the woods," he started.

"Caught site of some mountain lion tracks when we were looking for the newb..." When his brother elbowed him in the ribs, Emmett quickly finished, "Got a craving for cat."

Nessie delicately touched the dark hair at Jacob's temple. "Okay." When the men said nothing, but didn't retreat, she glanced back at them in puzzlement. "Have fun."

Jasper took a hesitant step towards her. "Nessie...you probably haven't looked in a mirror much the past couple of days, but..."

"Baby, you look like death," Emmett interrupted. "And that might be okay for us, but it ain't a good color on you."

"I know you're tired of everyone telling you what you need, but part of being an adult is realizing that sometimes we need the people who loves us to point out the obvious when we can't see it ourselves." Jasper crouched down next to his niece. "I know you already ate, but now you need blood."

It was a truth she had been ignoring since Brazil, but she could deny it no longer. Blood was exactly what she needed. Fresh, hot blood...her half-vampire body craved it and the human half wasn't strong enough to resist anymore.

So when Jasper reached for her hand and asked, "Come with us?," Nessie rose to her feet and let herself be led out of the room without protest.

Gentlemen to the core, her uncles gave Nessie the first kill, a sleek and snarling mountain lion whose blood immediately put color back in her cheeks. She had just finished burying the body and offering up a little prayer for the creature's death when she felt Emmett's hand on her shoulder.

"Better?" he asked, a twinkle in his eye.

"Yeah." Nessie smiled softly. "Thanks."

"That's what we're here for, darlin'." Emmett guided her over to a fallen tree and sat down beside her on the wide, moss-covered trunk. "So...how're you doing?" He tapped his finger against the side of her head. "What's going on in there?"

The woods were quiet, save for the occasional hoot of an owl or rustle of leaves in the cold wind. "I did something...really awful, Uncle Emmett," she whispered.

"You?" He shook his head. "I don't believe that for a minute."

Suddenly, she was so tired of holding everything in. If there was anyone in the family who wouldn't judge her or try to advise her, it was going to be the man sitting next to her. With tears stinging the backs of her eyes, Nessie hesitantly placed her small hand against Emmett's chiseled cheek.

A minute later, with all of her jumbled thoughts running through his mind, he stared at his niece. "Woah."

She tried to smile, but failed miserably as she lowered her hand and tucked it against her body. "I told you."

Emmett threaded his fingers together and tapped them against his mouth for a long minute. "So...you didn't..."

"I'm still a virgin."

He grimaced, like any uncle who was hearing too much information about his favorite niece's sex life. "Well. That's good news for that Nahuel kid's nuts," he muttered.

"But Jake thinks we're even," Nessie continued. "And I don't know what's worse...me wanting to hurt him as much as he hurt me...or him thinking that everything's okay now that he's not the only one who was bad." She paused. "It's not supposed to work like that...right? A wound for a wound?"

"Two wrongs don't make a right and all that Sunday school stuff, yeah?" Emmett waved away a hovering beetle. "Carlisle'd be better at answering that sort of thing."

"I want to know what you think."

"Doesn't matter what I think, sweet pea." Emmett put an arm around her and drew her closer. "Doesn't matter what anyone thinks but you. Cause you're the only one who has to live with it."

Nessie buried her face in her uncle's shirt. "Can I be three again? Please?"

He laughed and dropped a kiss onto the top of her head. "Now, I seem to remember a three year-old who told me that the only thing she wanted for Christmas was to be all grown up."

_Even at three, Nessie was far too clever not to know that it was her uncle in the Santa suit. Still, he had asked her what she wanted and she'd told him the truth. She couldn't wait to be a grown-up._

_"Why are you in such an awful hurry to grow up?" Emmett had asked her around the fake, white beard Alice had forced him to wear._

_Everyone was watching. Her parents...her grandparents...her aunts and uncles. And Jacob. _

_"Because grown-ups have all the fun," she had pouted. _

_It was a lie, but it made everyone laugh. Jacob had swung her up into his arms and planted a kiss on her cheek and just for a second, she wished she could tell him why she really wanted to be a grown-up. _

_So they could get married and live happily ever after._

_"Don't grow up too fast, Nessie," Jacob told her with a smile. "Okay?"_

_She would have promised him anything. "Okay." _

Jasper's sudden reappearance knocked Nessie out of the memory. "How'd you do?" Emmett asked his brother.

"Caught her." Jasper looked at Nessie. "There's a small herd of deer a few miles to the east."

Nessie rose to her feet, shaking her head. "I'm okay, Uncle Jazz. I'd like to get back to the house, if that's okay."

Jasper glanced at Emmett and waited for him to nod. "All right. Let's head home."

When they started off, Nessie was a few steps in front of the men, but after only a minute or two of walking, she stopped and looked back at them.

"Was this hunting trip my dad's idea or my mom's?"

"Does it matter?" Jasper asked with an arched eyebrow.

"No," she eventually decided. "I guess not." After another second, she faced forward again and resumed walking. Only her uncles could have heard her grumble, "You all know me way too well."

"Family," Emmett chuckled. "Kind of a bitch, eh?"

* * *

Alice had told herself a thousand times that she wasn't going to bother Jacob while he was recovering, but when she just happened to pass by his room and noticed the door was ajar, she couldn't help but peek inside.

Jacob was sitting on the edge of his bed, a thick, square bandage still covering his neck like an off-kilter bib. He was pale, but not deathly so, and he was frowning at a crescent-shaped bite mark on his forearm.

"Knock, knock?" His head shot up as Alice poked her head inside. "Are you supposed to be out of bed, Mr. Black?" she teased.

The corners of his lips turned up. "Are you going to tell on me, Ms. Cullen?"

Alice stepped into the room. "I'm no tattle-tale," she assured him. "How are you feeling?"

"Like hell." He turned his attention back to his arm. "This will go away, won't it?"

She frowned. "You've been bitten before, right?"

"Crushed, smacked, tossed, body-slammed and clawed," Jacob admitted. "But never bitten."

Alice delicately cleared her throat. "It'll fade." She paused. "Mostly."

"Great," he groaned. "Just what I wanted out of all of his. A souvenier." Lowering his arm, he winced in pain. "Guess that's what I get for being stupid."

"You're the only one who's used that word," Alice kindly reminded him.

"Then everyone else is being really polite." Jacob tried to stand, but the effort took too much energy. He slumped back with another groan. "Did the guys get off okay?"

"Bella's driving them to the airport as we speak." Alice watched him try to get up again and when he failed a second time, she stepped forward and ducked her whole body underneath his arm for support. With her help, Jacob finally rose to his feet. "There we go," she said cheerfully.

Jacob shook his head. "Nope. Dizzy. Gotta sit." Alice stepped back and let him fall back onto the bed. "No wonder Nessie left," he muttered a minute later, when the room stopped spinning. "I'm pathetic."

"Nessie's not here because Jasper and Emmett were given a mission to get her into the woods by any means necessary," she informed him as she took a seat on the bed beside him. "She hasn't had blood in weeks and it was starting to take a toll on her. I don't blame you for not noticing, but it's also not fair to jump to conclusions."

He nodded. "You're right. Sorry."

Alice sighed softly. "No, Jake...I'm sorry."

"What for?"

"I'm always sorry that I can't see anything that could help you and Nessie," she admitted. "Maybe if I could, none of this would have happened."

"Okay," he said a second later. "You are way too tiny to take on so much guilt." Jacob offered her a crooked smile. "What would you have done, anyway? She and I...we made our choices and that's that. No time to stop any of it."

Alice sniffed. "Little comfort."

Jacob nodded again, only absentmindedly this time. Just when Alice was about to say something, anything to break the silence, he suddenly spoke again. "Alice, you were with her in Rio." His jaw clenched. "You saw her with him."

"Mmm-hmm," was her only reply.

Alice braced herself for any number of questions that Jacob might have about Nahuel, but the one he asked nearly broke her unbeating heart. "Was she happy when she was with him? Even just for a minute..." He paused. "I'm only asking because..." His Adam's apple bobbed above the white bandage on his neck. "I hope she was."

"Oh, Jake," she murmured after a long moment of thought. "Maybe she was. For a minute." Alice put her small, cold hand on top of his. "But if it helps, I don't think it was true happiness. I think it was the kind of happiness we can almost trick ourselves into believing is true. Because the alternate...the unhappiness...it just...well...it sucks."

Jacob swallowed back a reluctant smile. "Okay." With a sigh, he slung his huge arm over her slender shoulders. "Let's trying this standing thing again."

Alice leapt up, ready, as always, to help a member of her family.

* * *

Upon her returning from the airport where she had dropped off Seth and Quil for their return journey to Forks, Bella searched the house until she found her husband in Carlisle's study. Edward was seated behind the massive cherry wood desk, surrounded by open medical texts, although his focus was on the glowing screen of Carlisle's computer.

"Welcome back," Edward said as she entered the room. Tearing his eyes away from his reading, he gave her smile that made her knees momentarily weak. "I missed you."

"I was gone for an hour," Bella reminded him. Coming around the desk, she glanced at the books and the article on the screen. "What's all this? Artery repair?"

Edward leaned back in his chair. "When Carlisle was working on Jacob, all I could really do was assist him. I don't know the latest surgical techniques and even my basic knowledge of the anatomy involved was shaky." When Bella put her hands on his shoulders, he reached back to cover them with his own. "I haven't gone to medical school since 1992."

"Hmm. Well, then..." Bella rested her chin on top of his messy bronze locks. "After we graduate this time, why don't we go together?"

"Together?" Edward thought about this for a second. "You'd want to?"

"Sure. I've always liked science. Why not get a medical degree? Or two?"

Edward urged her around his chair until he could grab her by the waist and pull her down onto his lap. Studying was forgotten as he kissed his wife, slowly and thoroughly. Pulling back, Edward tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "All right. We can always use another Dr. Cullen in the house."

Bella brushed kisses across his cheeks, his forehead and finally his mouth. "Love you," she whispered.

After Edward returned the whispered sentiment, they were quiet for a long minute, just enjoying being close. But eventually, Bella lifted her head from his shoulder. "Did Jasper and Emmett..."

"Yes," he answered her question before she could finish asking it. "I got a text from Emmett a few minutes ago. She's fine and they're on their way back."

Bella relaxed against him. "That's one less thing to worry about, I guess."

As if she had tempted fate, the phone on Carlisle's desk suddenly began to ring. Edward strained up to see the ID screen over the layers of books that lay between him and the device. "It's an unknown number," he reported.

"Telemarketer." Bella rolled her eyes. "Tell them we're a family of vampires and we don't need new long distance service. Maybe they'll finally put us on that no-call list."

Chuckling, Edward guided her lips back to his. As they kissed, Carlisle's voice filtered through the phone in a recorded message, telling the unidentified caller to leave a message after the beep. There was a shrill beep and then a second of silence.

What followed was enough of a shock to tear them out of their embrace.

"Hello, Carlisle. This is Zafrina. I am sorry to have called while you are not available, but I felt as though I must give you some...shall we say...warning. Nahuel is on his way to America. To see our Renesmee. I do not know what happened between the two of them, but I suspect his visit may not be welcome. What can I say? He is a young man in love and there is no talking to such a fool. Please call us if there is anything we can do to help. Thank you, old friend."

Bella stared at the machine for a long time after Zafrina's message ended. "Nahuel is coming here? Oh god..." She closed her eyes briefly. "How are we going to keep him and Jacob apart?"

"I have no idea." Edward's jaw clenched. "Let's try to keep this from my brothers for as long as possible. No need to give them time to organize any bets on who will be walking away from that showdown."

Bella frowned at her husband. "Forget about them!" Her expression softened into worry. "We have to tell Nessie. We can't just let Nahuel surprise her with no warning, especially since we still have no idea what he did to send her back her so upset and withdrawn and..."

"It's going to be all right," Edward soothed his wife's rapidly mounting anxiety. "Nahuel can't hurt her here." His tone grew dark. "I don't imagine he'll even get to be alone in a room with her."

"Edward...don't you go down this road again." His wife climbed off his lap in order to better look him in the eye. "We'll tell her that he's coming, yes, but after that...we have to let her deal with him on her own. Whether she wants to be alone with him or wants to kick his ass out of the house...it's up to Nessie. Not us. Understood?"

"But..."

Bella clamped her hand over his mouth. "I'm serious, Edward. And you'd better believe I'm going right upstairs to have this same conversation with Jacob. No one interferes in all of this unless Nessie asks for our help. Do I make myself clear?"

"Can I just say one more thing?" he asked, his words garbled and muffled around her hand.

"No." After dropping a kiss onto his head, Bella stepped back, turned and left the study. Edward sank back into his chair. If he hadn't known it to be impossible, he would have sworn he was coming down with a sudden migraine.

* * *

To Be Continued


	27. Chapter 27

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: I'm so sorry this chapter took so long. Lots and lots of mitigating factors. I hope it was worth the wait:) Thank you so much for all of the incredibly kind feedback so far!

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

Jasper could feel tension in the air from the moment he and Emmett arrived back at the house with Nessie. Even before Edward met them in the hallway, he knew something huge had happened while they were gone.

But like any protective father, Edward put on a good show for his daughter. "Nessie," he greeted her. "Where have you been?"

Nessie rolled her eyes, but she was smiling. "Don't play innocent, Daddy. I'm on to you." Before he could deny any and all knowledge of the request he and Bella had made for her uncles to take her into the woods, she darted forward and kissed his cheek. "Thank you. For knowing what I needed."

Edward touched her cheek. "I love you, sweetheart." There was a strain in his voice that only his brothers, having lived with him for over fifty years, could have possibly noticed.

Like a well-oiled machine of distraction and diversion, Emmett nudged Nessie with his elbow. "I don't know about you, kid," he started, "but I could sure use a hot shower. A really, really long, super freaking hot shower..."

Nessie's brown eyes flared indignantly. "Don't you even think about using all the water, Uncle Emmett! The rest of us have to shower, too, you know!"

"Beat me upstairs and it's all yours," he challenged her.

That was all the motivation that Nessie needed. Like she was a little girl again, she took off up the staircase, determined to make it to the bathroom first. She was so focused on her goal that she didn't even notice that Emmett wasn't following her.

"Thanks," Edward told his brother once his daughter was out of hearing range.

"What's happened?" Jasper asked. "Is it Jacob?"

"He's fine. Well, for now he is, at least."

Emmett frowned. "What the hell does that mean?"

"We got a call a little while ago." Edward paused. "Guess who's coming to see Nessie?"

It took Emmett a second longer than Jasper to figure things out. When he finally did, his fists balled up, like he was already preparing for a fight. "What the hell is that kid thinking?" Emmett snarled.

"That kid is older than you by about a hundred years," Jasper reminded his brother. "Frankly, I'm surprised it's taken him this long to make the trip." He shook his head. "He believes he is in love with her."

Edward looked Jasper in the eye. "You felt that from him?"

"It was very hard to miss."

A moment passed before Emmett dared to ask, "So, what's the plan? Should we head him off in the woods?"

"There is no plan," Edward told them. He turned and started towards the study. "We're not going to stop him."

Exchanging a look, his brothers followed him. "You're sure?" Jasper asked.

"We can make him reconsider the trip," Emmett promised. Cracking his knuckles, he added, "It would be my pleasure."

"Oh, mine, too," Edward assured him as they entered their father's study.

Rising from Carlisle's leather desk chair, Bella finished her husband's thought. "But this has to be Nessie's call, not ours. Where is she?"

Emmett pointed at the ceiling. "Upstairs, washing up."

"You are going to tell her before he arrives." Jasper's comment was a less of a question and more of a statement.

"We won't let her be blind-sided," Edward said after exchange a look with his wife. "As for Jacob..." He trailed off, having no idea how to finish the sentence.

True to his nature as a lover and a fighter, Emmett rubbed his hands together. "Looks like we're in for one hell of a brawl!"

"You could try not enjoying this." Bella glared at him. "Someone could get hurt."

"Really?" Her biggest brother-in-law gave her a pointed look. "I'll put my money on Jacob over Nahuel, injured or not. Are you saying you wouldn't?"

After a moment, she snapped, "Oh just...shut up." To this, Emmett merely snickered.

Edward rubbed a spot on his forehead. "You know, as glad as I am that we're all under one roof again, I can't say I don't miss how quiet it was in here when you were all away." In apology, Bella took his free hand and waited for him to squeeze her fingers. "All right," he sighed. "Who's telling whom about you know who?"

* * *

After her shower, Nessie pulled on a pair of jeans and a T-shirt from Niagara Falls that had belonged to her mother. Barefoot, with her hair air-drying into long, perfect curls, she slipped out of her room at the exact moment that Jacob stormed out of his.

They froze, eyes locked for several painfully long seconds. "Should you be up?" was all Nessie could think to ask. "You're still...are you still..."

"I'm fine." Jacob peeled off the bandage on his neck, revealing a jagged area of pink skin where the newborn had ripped him open. "See?"

She nodded tightly. Another second ticked by like an hour. "Jake, I was so scared that you..."

He cut her off. "You shouldn't worry about me." He paused. "It's not worth it."

"I can't even believe you just said that." Nessie folded her arms protectively over her chest. Choosing to move on rather than even dignify his words with any further response, she shifted her weight from one foot to the other. "Look, there's something I need to tell you. When we talked about Nahuel..."

The intensity of the scowl that suddenly darkened his handsome face caught her off guard, as did the vehemence in his tone as he growled, "Do me a favor? Give me a couple of hours before I have to deal with him."

Nessie frowned. "What do you mean?"

Before Jacob could reply, the door to his room opened behind him and Bella stepped out into the hallway. "Not like this, Jake."

Her mother's cryptic statement must have meant something to Jacob; he looked up at the ceiling, as if waging an internal battle with himself. Finally, he looked back down at Nessie.

"This might not mean much now, but I just need you to understand..." His eyes were so sad that she could feel tears suddenly spring to her own. "All I have ever wanted from the moment I first held you...was for you to be safe. Safe and happy." His Adam's apple bobbed. "No matter where you find that happiness...or who you find it with."

"I don't..." She stared at him, willing back her tears, but they were coming on too strong, too fast. "Why are you saying that? After everything that's happened, why would you say something like that?"

Jacob flinched when Bella laid a hand on his arm. "I'm sorry." He jerked away from them. "I'm going for a run."

"Jake!" Nessie called out, rushing after him. "You can't run! You were just..." But before she even reached the stairs, he was gone. She turned on her mother as she came up behind her. "We have to stop him before he pulls his wound open!"

Bella shook her head. "Let him go, sweetie. He needs a little space to clear his head."

"Clear of it what?" Nessie's lower lip trembled. "Me?"

"It's more complicated than that, I promise." Putting her arm around her daughter's shoulders, Bella walked her back to her bedroom door. "Nessie, I honestly don't know if you're going to take this as good news or bad, so I'm just going to tell you straight out. Nahuel is on his way here to see you."

Nessie stopped in her tracks. "Oh god." She closed her eyes briefly. "Jake knows?"

Bella inclined her chin. "Alice was supposed to break the news to you when she and Rosalie get back from the store. We thought, since she was with you in Brazil..." She trailed off. "Are you okay with this?"

"Mom..."

"Because if you're not, and you don't want to see him, your father and your uncles and maybe even your grandfather will make absolutely sure that he never feels the need to come to America ever again."

Shaking her head ever so slightly, Nessie stared off into space until she reached her decision. "Nahuel and I..." She tried again. "There are things I need to say to him. I think I led him on, Mom. And the worst thing is..." Fresh tears welled up in her eyes. "I think I knew exactly what I was doing...and I didn't care."

Bella tucked a damp curl behind Nessie's ear. "We all want to feel wanted. There's nothing wrong with that."

"Even if you know you'll never really want him back?" Nessie thumbed away her tears before they could fall down her cheeks. "Nahuel didn't treat me like a little girl. That's what I really wanted. Everything else about him..."

"Didn't quite measure up?"

"I used him." Nessie sniffed. "I suck."

Bella's perfect lips curved into a smile. "Do you think you're the first girl in history who's had to choose between something good and something great?" She held Nessie's chin steady, to keep her from looking down. "Jacob is your something great. It took me a very long time to accept that, but there's just no denying it. Not after everything that's happened."

"I think I don't even care about Leah anymore," Nessie whispered. "After almost losing him, it's like...does it really matter? Did it ever really matter?"

"You should tell him that," Bella advised. "Say what you have to say to Nahuel, but Jacob needs to know the truth. The whole truth this time."

Nodding, Nessie took a step back. "Do you think I can catch up to him?"

"Knowing him, he'll find you first."

* * *

Jacob ran until the woods abruptly ended and the paved lanes of the highway signaled the beginning of civilization. He could either go south and see if he could make it all the way to California or he could go north towards Canada. In truth, neither of those options appealed to him in the slightest, but putting as much distance between himself and Nahuel seemed like a very good idea.

Even just thinking about him made Jacob want to punch a tree until he knocked it over. The arrogant bastard hadn't been content with taking Nessie's innocence; now it seemed like he wanted the rest of her. Why else was he travelling thousands of miles to see her without an invitation? Certainly not just to say hello.

As he stood on the dirt shoulder of the road, Jacob kicked a loose chunk of asphalt. As much as he wanted to blame Nahuel for everything, he knew all too well exactly who was at fault for the whole situation. And it wasn't Leah.

He heard a car approaching long before it appeared around the bend. Jacob recognized the make right away; Rosalie had the same Porsche, only in fire-engine red, rather than ink black. Something was wrong with the engine; as it zoomed past Jacob, it made a noise that no German motor should ever make. He wasn't at all surprised when the driver pulled off onto the shoulder a hundred yards up the road.

Jacob broke into a jog. He could already see smoke creeping out from the Porsche's hood. The driver was still seated inside, as if he expected the problem to magically fix itself. Snorting, Jacob slowed as he reached the car.

"Need a hand?" The question was out of his mouth before he got a good look at the driver. When he did, his friendly smile morphed into something much more dangerous.

Jacob took a huge step back as the door swung open and Nahuel stepped out of the car. Even when he took off his dark sunglasses, he somehow managed to successfully hide his own reaction to Jacob's presence behind a cool, vampire mask of superior indifference.

"I would have thought," Nahuel said with what Jacob took for a sneer, "that after many years of living with the Cullens, you would have bought yourself at least one shirt."

* * *

To Be Continued


	28. Chapter 28

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: This story has had so many lives, but I feel this is the one that will see it through to its conclusion. To anyone still reading, who has been hoping for a new chapter for longer than I care to admit, all I can do is apologize profusely and thank you, not only for your kind words, but for your understanding. I just hope it was worth the wait...

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

Nessie left the house quietly, as not to alarm anyone, but by the time she hit the woods she was running. Jacob's scent was easy to follow; it was still tinged with the copper tang of blood from his healing wounds. She would never be as fast as her father, but Nessie darted around trees and leaped over rocks with all the grace that Edward's supernatural genes had given her.

When she reached the edge of the woods and slowed down, the only reason she felt out of breath was because his scent had grown so strong. Jacob...her Jake...was nearby.

But he wasn't alone.

Nessie took a deep breath and immediately her eyes flared wide. She recognized a second scent on the wind. Mixed with Jake's, it was all she needed to break through the line of trees and seek out the two sources on the long stretch of empty, paved road.

She spotted the Porsche first, the two men standing beside it second. Nessie nearly sighed in relief. Jacob had not phased yet, but even from a distance she could see that his fists were balled up, his knuckles nearly white, and that his legs were positioned as if he was ready to strike at any minute.

Nahuel, on the other hand, had his hands in his pockets. It wasn't an act of submission; it was rather a silent way of telling his rival that he did not consider him a threat.

Nessie looked back and forth between the two of them. They were so similar, yet they couldn't have been more different. Nahuel looked the same to her as he had in Rio, the same, in fact, as he had when he'd come to Forks to save her family from the Volturi. All that had changed were his clothes; he'd traded his loincloth for pants and a shirt.

But Jake...everything about him had changed from the best friend she'd known as a child. Even now, just looking at him took her breath away. He was beautiful, both inside and out. She hated the snarl she could see on his face not only because it didn't suit him at all, but because she was the reason for it. Her lie. Her half-truth. He was hurting because of her, and although his actions had inflicted the same pain on her, she couldn't let him suffer a minute longer.

It had to end.

"Stop!" she cried out.

Both men turned to look at her as she started jogging towards them around the bend in the road. Jacob's fists relaxed and the snarl disappeared.

"Nahuel...Jacob." Although she said both their names, Nessie was only look at Jake. "I won't let you fight. Not because of me."

"Renesmee," Nahuel greeted her, ignoring her call for peace. "I missed you when you left Brazil."

She shook her head, watching as a fresh scowl darkened Jacob's face. "I'm sorry for that, but I'm not sorry for leaving. I don't belong there." She paused. "This is my home."

Nahuel withdrew one hand from his pocket and reached out to touch her shoulder. Nessie flinched at the contact and Jacob took a step towards him.

"I'm serious," Nessie snapped, moving out of Nahuel's range. "Both of you. No fighting." Her eyes swung to Nahuel. "And I think I made my feelings clear in Rio."

Nahuel shook his head. "You were confused on the beach. It is understandable. It was your first time."

Nessie looked at Jacob just in time to see his Adam's apple bobbed as he tried, unsuccessfully, to swallow. His features were pinched with pain, like Nahuel's words had stabbed him through the heart.

"It's not what you think, Jake!" Nessie began. "He didn't mean..."

"I know what he meant!" Jacob yelled. "You told me what he meant and I accepted it, Ness, but I am not going to stand around and listen to him talk about it!"

Nessie's mind was such a blur that she didn't even realize Nahuel had come up behind her until he spoke and his voice was far too close. "If you were smart," he put his hands on her shoulders possessively, "you would listen to Renesmee, Jacob."

"If you were smart you'd start running," Jacob growled as waves of heat began to emanate from his body.

"No!" Nessie broke away from Nahuel and ran forward to stop the transformation. But it was too late; by the time she reached him, the wolf had already appeared.

In the first few seconds of the phase, where Jacob had no control over his massive, muscled limbs, one of his expanding paws accidentally caught Nessie in the stomach and sent her flying back into the road.

At that very second, a pick-up truck, not unlike the one Bella had driven once upon a time, came speeding around the bend, blind to the girl picking herself up off the pavement.

Both half-vampire and werewolf tried to reach her in time, but although the driver tried to step on his brakes at the last moment, the truck slammed into Nessie's only half-immortal body.

* * *

With her feet in her husband's lap, Bella was barely listening to Edward read. Although the poem was one of her favorites and his voice was like music, she couldn't concentrate on the words while the lives of the two people she loved most in the world after Edward were so conflicted.

"_Lying, robed in snowy white...that loosely flowed from left to right...the leaves upon her falling light...thro' the noises of the night...she floated down to Camelot._" Edward looked up from the yellowed pages of the ancient book only to find his wife staring into space. "Tennyson isn't doing it for you today, is he?"

Bella shifted her gaze to his beloved face. "I'm sorry. I just keep thinking I shouldn't have let her go after him." Edward raised an eyebrow. "Alone," she quickly added. "It might have been better for her not to go alone."

He smiled. "See how easy it is?"

"To go from wanting to protect to treating her like a child?" Bella let out a silent sigh. "Thank you for not gloating."

Smirking, he looked back at the faded words on the pages. "Should I continue?"

Bella shifted slightly, inching closer to him on the couch so that she could rest her cheek on his shoulder. "All right."

"_And as the boat-head wound along...the willowy hills and fields among...they heard her singing her last song...the Lady of..._"

Edward stopped without warning; the book fell from his hands. Bella sat up, frowning at her husband's perfect profile.

"What is it?" She touched his hand. "Edward?"

Pushing her legs off his lap, Edward jumped to his feet; Bella was only a second behind him. His head swung in the direction of the front door. "Nessie. Nessie!"

Bella followed him as he ran out of the library and into the foyer. Having heard his brother's shout, Emmett was already halfway down the stairs, while Jasper, Esme and Carlisle emerged from the living room. Alice and Rosalie had not yet returned from the store.

"What's goin' on?" Emmett demanded.

"Where's Nessie?" Esme asked.

Edward was at the door in the blink of an eye; when he opened it, Jacob was already standing on the stoop, cradling Nessie in his arms. Her eyes were closed and her face was white, save for the trickle of blood at the corner of her mouth.

There were tears in Jacob's blood-shot eyes. "I'm so sorry."

* * *

The impact of the truck smacked Nessie into darkness. She had no idea how long she lingered in unconsciousness, but when she began to hear voices all around her, she struggled to find her way out of the black.

At first, all she understood were pieces, bits of an intense fight taking place over her head.

"...an accident, Edward! I swear...never hurt her...never! On my life...she is my life..."

"...always knew...you would destroy someone I loved...but her..."

Nessie felt hands holding each of hers, while another hand stroked her cheek. She knew the soft touch of her mother's slender fingers, but she could sense those fingers trembling, perhaps in anger, but also in fear.

She frowned. It had to stop. Everything...the fight, the worry...she had to make it stop.

"She's coming around!" Nessie heard the relief in her mother's words even before she opened her eyes and saw Bella looking down at her. "Nessie, can you hear me?"

It took a second for her to be able to nod, but when she did, the tension in the room broke. Her mother's smile was powerful enough to encourage Nessie to look around, seeking out the rest of her family.

Rosalie was sitting on her right side, next to where Bella stood, holding her right hand while Uncle Emmett stood behind her. Had her aunt been able to cry, there would have been tears streaking down her porcelain cheeks. As it was, her expression was so full of tender concern that Nessie couldn't help but try to smile.

She glanced at her other side and found Alice gently holding her left hand with Jasper standing right behind her. Beyond them, though, Nessie could see her father and Jacob.

"Dad," Nessie whispered.

Edward bolted to her side, almost knocking his sister and brother out of the way to get to her. "Ness." He touched her cheek. "Don't try to talk. You might have internal bleeding."

She shook her head against the pillow. "No. Dad..." Nessie looked him in the eye. "It's not Jake's fault."

Taking her hand from Alice, careful not to jostle the IV that protruded from behind her knuckles, Edward lifted it to his cheek. "Can you show me?"

Although she tried, she didn't have the energy to bring the memory into her mind, let alone project it into his. Finally, Nessie had to give up. "Please...trust me," she implored her father.

"Nessie, it's all right." Jacob came up behind Bella, yet kept a safe distance from her mother. He ignored Rosalie's scowl. "It was my fault. Accidental or not...it was."

Tears collected in the corners of her brown eyes. "Mom." She tried to lift herself up on her elbows. "Please...don't let him leave..." Her stomach cramped in protest and her brow crinkled in pain, but she forced her final thought out. "Not again..."

The darkness was looming. It overpowered her a moment later, enveloping her in a painless, emotionless void.

* * *

"It's all right," Carlisle said when Nessie passed out again. "I introduced some morphine into her IV. She was pushing herself too much, too soon."

"Thank you," Bella murmured, looking down at her daughter's pale, but peaceful face. "Tell me she's going to be all right."

"She will," he assured her. "I still want to do an ultrasound to look for bleeding, but the fact that she woke up and was able to communicate...it's a very good sign."

"You should see the truck." Nahuel's voice startled everyone, as if they had forgotten he was standing in the doorway to Nessie's room. Through silent agreement, Jacob had carried her to her own bed, as all of the medical equipment used to save his life was already gathered there. "Renesmee is very strong," he continued, tempering his attempt at a joke.

Esme came up beside Carlisle as he rechecked Nessie's IV. "I don't understand how this happened."

"It's simple," Edward snarled. "Jacob and his kind can't control themselves as much as they like to think they can." He lowered his daughter's hand back down to the bed. "They hurt the people who get close to them." Out of the corner of his eye, Edward noticed Alice shaking her head. "You disagree?"

"Nessie has spent her entire life around Jacob. She's seen him phase more times than I can count. She knows what happens when he does...she knows better than to get too close to him."

Emmett frowned. "Are you saying this was Nessie's fault, Alice?"

"She's saying it was an accident," Jasper came to his wife's defense. "And I agree with her."

"Of course you do," Edward snapped. "Alice, why are you always defending Jacob?!"

She stood up, facing off against her brother. "Because he's a member of this family, whether you like it or not!"

"He's a member of this family who keeps hurting another member of this family!"

"I think we need to take this somewhere else," Carlisle said. "For Nessie's sake."

Esme nodded. "If there's even a chance she can hear us..."

"No, Alice is right." All heads, even Nahuel's, turned to Rosalie, every single one of them, even Emmett, with a matching look of surprise. "Look, I will admit that Jacob and I have never seen eye to eye about Nessie, but it hasn't been because I thought he didn't care about her or wouldn't do everything in his power to keep her safe." She reached back and covered the hand Emmett had on her shoulder. "If Nessie doesn't blame him, we shouldn't either."

Silence followed her speech until Edward looked at his wife. "Bella?"

Instead of looking back at him, Bella focused on Jacob. "Why?" She clarified a second later. "Why did you phase?"

All he could do was lift his shoulders. "I was angry."

"At her?"

Jacob shook his head. "Never at her."

Bella nodded tightly, as if that was exactly what she had needed to hear to make up her mind. "She wants you to stay. Don't let her down again."

"I won't," he promised.

Yet under the weight of Edward's glare, Jacob respectfully backed up and walked out of the room. As he passed Nahuel, they locked stares for a moment, but there was no trace of triumph in the half-vampire's expression. Just regret.

A few minutes later, when Nahuel made a move to follow Jacob, Jasper darted across the room, blocking his path. "Do you really think that's a good idea?"

"It is all right," Nahuel said. "I understand now, my friend."

"And what's that?" Emmett asked as he moved towards them, to back up his brother if necessary.

Nahuel ducked under Jasper's arm before he could be stopped. In the hallway, he turned around and simply replied, "My role in our Renesmee's life."

* * *

TBC

A/N: The poem is part of "The Lady of Shallot" by Alfred Lord Tennyson.


	29. Chapter 29

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: I was so happy and grateful to see there were still people interested in this story! Thank you so much! I'm estimating one more chapter after this, but you just never know. Christmas is coming, after all:) Enjoy!

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

The sun had almost completely set for the night, but there was just enough light left to turn the sky that backed the forest behind the house into a breathtaking royal blue. The trees were black in comparison and the stars were just barely twinkling above them.

This was always Nessie's favorite time of the evening. She loved the contrast between the silhouette of the trees and the sapphire color of the sky. They had spent countless hours, many of them in which Jacob had phased in order to give her warm fur pillow to lay against, watching the blue turn darker until night completely descended.

Jake swallowed, ignoring the dull ache that still persisted in his recently-wounded throat. He had reached a point when he couldn't even bear the mess of his own thoughts; he could only concentrate on one thing...curbing the desire to run away. Nessie wanted him to stay. There was no reason for her to want that, considering what he'd done to her, but he owed her this one small favor.

He had only been standing on the back porch of the Cullen's mansion for a few minutes before he suddenly realized he wasn't alone. Since he didn't smell vampire in the night air, it could only be one person standing in the open, sliding glass door.

"You can't really think I feel like talking to you, man," Jacob said without turning around. "Ever."

Nahuel stepped onto the porch, leaving the door open behind him. "Believe me when I say I have no desire to speak with you, either." He paused. "But for the sake of the one thing we have in common..."

He didn't need to finish the thought. After a moment, Jacob turned around, leaning back against the railing with his arms crossed over his chest. "Do you want to gloat or something?"

"Gloat?" Nahuel frowned. "I do not know this word."

Jacob shook his head. "You know...gloat. Brag." When the man's frown grew deeper, he drew in a breath. "Look, I can't go around saying that I want Nessie to be happy and expect to be with her, when it's clear that the only time she has been happy lately was when she was with you." He paused for so long that he almost wasn't able to continue. "I'm always going to be in her life, just so you know. You might have won her heart, but..."

Nahuel cut him off. "Renesmee does not deserve this. She deserves a man who would fight to keep her, not one who would surrender when there is an obstacle in his way!"

Unable to argue this, Jacob looked down at his feet.

Moving forward, Nahuel joined him at the railing. "When I met Renesmee, everything in my world changed."

"Yeah." Jacob lifted his chin to look up at the emerging stars. "Join the club."

"Things I had always known to be true were suddenly revealed to be lies. Events I believed I was responsible for turned out to be beyond my control." He paused. "And in the middle of all of this...there was a girl who was like me, yet not a sister to me."

Jacob said nothing as he waited for his rival to go on.

"I may not have been wrong to assume that she would be my destiny," Nahuel continued, "but I was too quick to assume that I would be hers."

"I could just as easily say the same thing," Jacob admitted.

"But you would be wrong," Nahuel said. It was only when Jacob turned his head to look at him that he went on, "I will not tell you what really happened between Renesmee and myself in Brazil because it is not my place to do so, but I will tell you that it was not my face she saw in the crowd, nor when she closed her eyes." He grimaced. "It was always you."

Jacob's shoulders hunched a bit under the weight of this information. "You still might be better for her."

"Oh, I am certain that I am better for her," Nahuel assured him.

"But the heart doesn't always know 'better.'" Both men looked up to see Edward standing in the open doorway. "It only knows 'right.'" A moment passed. "Nahuel, would you give us a minute?"

With a nod, Nahuel stepped past Nessie's father and closed the door behind him, leaving vampire and werewolf alone on the porch.

An owl hooted somewhere in the woods, a lonely sound that made Jacob shiver. He had no idea what Edward was going to say, but he held no hope that it would be something he wanted to hear. Still, if anyone deserved to say his piece where Jacob was concerned, it was Nessie's father.

"She's going to be fine," Edward finally said. "There's no sign of internal bleeding." He paused. "My wife thinks I shouldn't have jumped to that conclusion before Carlisle finished his exam."

Jacob's voice was hoarse when he replied, "Seemed like a possibility to me, too." He cleared his throat before continuing, "I know Ness wants me to stay, but if you want me gone..."

"That's not my call." Edward smiled ruefully. "It hasn't been my call for awhile; I just wasn't ready to admit that up until now. Actually, I'm still not entirely ready," he admitted. A moment passed. "Maybe you'll understand that someday if you're as lucky as I've been."

A cold wind blew over them, rustling the trees.

"Nessie is the only child I will ever have," Edward said when the wind died down. "She's my miracle."

"I know," Jacob murmured.

"I don't think you do." Nessie's father walked towards him. "You can have as many children as you want, Jake."

Jacob lifted his shoulders. "Maybe not. Nobody knows that. Not even Alice."

"You're missing my point," Edward sighed.

"So, you do have one?"

Torn between how he wanted to respond to Jake's snark, Edward settled on what he thought Bella would have wanted. He took a moment to collect himself and let the comment slide. But before he could say anything else, Jacob turned the tide of the confrontation.

"I love Nessie. Not as a brother or an uncle or even just a friend. I love her like you love Bella." Jacob unfolded his arms. "And I'm not going to be ashamed of that anymore. I am done trying to convince myself that it's wrong or that I shouldn't...because Nessie does deserve better than that. She deserves to be loved like the woman she is, and the only way I'm not going to be that man for her is if she doesn't want me to be. But if she does..." He paused. "I will fight for her, Edward, with my very last breath."

The two men, who had been at odds over a woman since the day they'd crossed into each other's worlds, locked stares until the last traces of the sun's light had been smothered by the black of night.

Finally, Edward took a step back. "Go sit with her. She'll want to see you when she wakes up."

Jacob smiled wryly. "I sure as hell hope so." He moved past Edward, but at the glass door, he stopped and looked back. "Thank you."

"It's what parents do," Edward said. When Jacob disappeared inside the house, he shook his head. "Doesn't make it any easier."

* * *

Alice offered to drive Nahuel into town to find a mechanic who would be willing to tow his Porsche after hours, but she didn't make the gesture entirely out of the goodness of her heart.

Having been the one to bring Nahuel into their lives, Alice felt the most responsible for what had or hadn't happened to him.

At first, it didn't seem like Nahuel wanted to talk about anything, but she was not so easily dissuaded. Eventually, after a couple of comments about the weather and a few questions about Zafrina's coven, Nahuel gave in with a sigh.

"Why do you not simply ask me what you wish to ask me?" He offered Alice a sad smile. "We are friends, are we not?"

"Of course we are." She readjusted her hands around the steering wheel of her black Maserati Gran Turismo, a present from Bella, as her beloved yellow Porsche reminded her sister-in-law of a time she would have rather forgotten. "I just don't know how to ask you this."

Nahuel nodded. "How do you ask someone who has just lost their heart if they are all right?"

Alice took her eyes off the road just long enough to look at him. "Are you?"

"Ask me when I am home, Alice," he said wearily. "When I am warm again and when I can no longer smell the scent of her perfume."

She bit her lip. "I shouldn't have taken her to Brazil."

"No. It was good that you did." Nahuel turned his head to look out the window. "I would have never known my true destiny. I would have always thought it was Renesmee."

Nothing more was said until Alice pulled up to the gas pumps of service station that still had its lights on and its garage open. Leaving him in the car, she climbed out and started walking towards the attendant...only to stop in her tracks when she realized that she recognized the woman pumping gas into a Toyota Corolla that had seen better days.

"Leah?"

The Quileute warrior looked like she wanted to flee at the sound of her name, and her stiff limbs didn't relax when she recognized Alice's face.

"What are you doing in town?" Alice asked with a friendly smile.

"Just...passing through." Leah quickly added, "I didn't come to see Jake."

Alice nodded because it was the only thing she could think to do. "Where are you headed?"

She raised her shoulders and released them with a sigh. "No idea. I just wanted to get away."

"If you need a place to stay..."

"You always were one of the nice ones." Leah shook her head. "I couldn't. But...you know...thanks."

Alice gave her a small smile. "Take care of yourself, Leah."

When Leah just nodded, Alice hesitated before moving on. Yet by the time she reached the attendant's office, a thought so positively insane yet absolutely brilliant had occurred to her. It wasn't a vision, but it might as well have been for how utterly certain she was about it.

With movements so fast that only Nahuel would have seen her if he'd been paying attention, Alice darted back to Leah's car. As the woman was on the other side, she didn't see Alice put her tiny, but powerful fist through Leah's back rear tire, but she certainly heard the explosion of air and noticed when the car suddenly sagged.

"What the hell?!"

By then, Alice was already back at her own car. Opening Nahuel's door, she looked down at him with a mischievous grin.

"Do you know how to change a tire?"

Later, when Alice relayed the story to Jasper, telling him how she'd last seen Nahuel removing his shirt to avoid getting it dirty and Leah not trying very hard to stop staring at his bare chest, all her husband could do was kiss the top of her head and murmur, "Destiny. It's rarely what you expect."

* * *

The hand Nessie felt surrounding hers the next time she woke up was too big and rough to belong to her mother, her grandmother or her aunts, but too warm to be her father's, her grandfather's or her uncles' . It could really only be one person and the knowledge of that made Nessie smile as she opened her eyes.

Sitting in the chair next to her bed, Jacob had started to doze off. His chin rested on his chest, hiding his face behind spikes of jet black hair.

Needing to see his eyes, Nessie squeezed her fingers around his hand. "Jake?" she whispered.

He jerked awake with a moment of confusion that was quickly replaced with worry. "Nessie?" He blinked to clear the sleep out of his eyes. "Are you okay?"

Although she hadn't tried to move yet, she nodded. She felt better; the pain and soreness were almost entirely gone and she didn't think it had anything to do with any drug her grandfather might have given her. Her system would have burned it off almost immediately anyway. She was fine, or she would be very soon.

In fact, Nessie felt like leaping up from the bed, throwing her arms around her Jacob, and never letting go.

But she just smiled. "Yeah. I'm a lot tougher than I look."

"Never doubted that." Jacob lifted her hand up to his mouth and pressed a kiss against the side of her palm. "Nessie, I am so sorry."

"It's okay." Even just that small amount of contact between his mouth and her skin made her feel things that Nahuel's lips on her breast hadn't been able to elicit. Nessie ran her tongue over her dry bottom lip. "It was an accident."

He nodded, but the troubled look in his dark eyes didn't go away. "This isn't all I've done to hurt you, though." Jacob lowered her hand back down to the bed. "I don't want to keep hurting you by bringing it up, but..."

"Jake." Nessie waited until he was looking at her, so he could see her face. "I forgive you."

The little lines around his eyes vanished and the tightness in his mouth softened. In fact, his whole body seemed to relax, as if someone had removed anvils from his shoulders.

"Ness..."

"I love you," she rushed on. "I never stopped. Even when I didn't want to love you, I couldn't make myself hate you." Her eyes were shiny with unshed tears. "It would have been like hating a part of myself, you know?"

His Adam's apple bobbed. "Oh...I know."

Nessie winced, but she managed to sit up in bed, a sure sign that there was no permanent damage and she would be back on her feet soon. "But I don't want to be just your friend, Jake. And I definitely don't want to be your little sister." A rush of blood turned her cheeks pink. "I want to be your lover. Your wife. Someday, hopefully...the mother of your children."

"I want that, too," he whispered. "God, Nessie, you have no idea how much I want that." When she said nothing to this, Jacob shook his head. "Of course you don't...because I've been an ass for way too long and haven't shown you." Leaning forward, he reached out to comb his fingers through her hair. "That ends now."

Grasping the back of her head, Jacob drew her towards him until their mouths met.

The only thing that stopped this kiss was Carlisle entering the room to check on his patient. Even then, Jacob waited, biding his time until they could be alone again. As he counted down the seconds it took for the vampire doctor to examine her, Jacob savored the impression her lips had made on his.

Now she just tasted perfect.

* * *

TBC


	30. Chapter 30

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: Thank you so much to everyone who read and reviewed the last chapter! I know there was a little bit of concern that I was wrapping things up too quickly, but in all honesty...I'm just not sure how much more angst I could throw at these two before it got to be too much! But still...there's about two chapters left (I'm estimating), so you just never know. In the meantime, enjoy this, my little Christmas present to you, the loyal reader. Happy Holidays!

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

Long before dawn, Bella and Edward found Jacob, fully clothed, lying on his side in Nessie's bed. He was fast asleep with Nessie curled up against his chest, sleeping equally peacefully with his massive arms around her.

Bella smiled as she reached for her husband's hand. "Whatever she becomes with Jake, she's never going to stop being our little girl, you know."

"I know." Edward looked away when Nessie stirred and burrowed deeper into Jacob's embrace. "How much do you think she would hate me if I asked her to wait to get married until she's gone through college at least once?"

"I don't think she would hate you at all...if you made it clear that the decision as to when she loses her virginity is entirely up to her." Bella squeezed his hand when he visibly winced. "It's going to happen, Edward. Sooner, I would guess, rather than later. You don't have to like it, and you can offer all the advice to the contrary that you want, but..."

Edward stopped her with a kiss. "Would it be all right if I didn't acknowledge it at all?"

Still smiling, his wife shook her head, her long, brown locks brushing against her arms. "She would probably be fine with that. Jake, too."

He kissed her again on the lips, then pressed a kiss against her forehead as he drew her into his arms. "Not a day goes by that I don't thank whoever is listening for you...for my daughter...for our family...for what we have here."

"Edward." Resting her cheek over his unbeating heart, Bella closed her eyes in complete contentment. "Me, too." Drawing back slightly, she tugged at his arm, guiding him out into the hall so she could shut the door on the sleeping couple.

With more than a little reluctance, Edward followed his wife down the main staircase, but he froze at the same moment she did when they both spotted Emmett hauling a ten-foot tall, dark green fir tree in through the front door. He acknowledged them with nothing more than a nod and a grin as he dragged the tree into the living room.

Bella glanced back at her husband. "It's still March, isn't it?"

Edward frowned. "The last time I checked, yes." Just then, Alice danced into the room, carrying a box that was almost bigger than her. A silver garland peeked out from the top. "Alice?" She stopped and looked up at them. "What's going on?"

"It's a surprise." As if that was all the explanation that was necessary, Alice continued on her way, her tiny feet barely crunching the fallen fir needles that Emmett had left in his wake.

By silent agreement, Bella and Edward followed her into the living room where Emmett and Jasper were working together to secure the massive tree in the metal stand that had been packed away less than three months earlier. Carlisle was in the middle of unraveling endless strands of white lights, while Esme and Rosalie were sorting through boxes of ornaments and decorations.

"Does someone want to fill us in?" Edward asked his family. "Why are you decorating the house for Christmas in March?"

"Because Nessie and Jake and Rosalie," Emmett winked at his wife, "are here now."

"And we can have Christmas for real," Alice added.

Esme smiled as she lovingly unwrapped an antique silver ornament in the shape of a heart, the first Christmas present Carlisle had ever given her. "As a family," she murmured.

"Even if it is the wrong time of year," Jasper finished.

Bella smiled. "That makes perfect sense." She looked at Edward. "Right?"

"Yes." Grinning, he looked around. "What can we do to help?"

Carlisle sighed, the only sign of frustration he ever gave. "You can start by unraveling these." He tossed the tangled ball of lights to his son. "Can we try to remember to wrap them up neatly when they come back down again, so we don't have to go through this again?"

Rosalie took the stack of Christmas stockings over to the wide fireplace. "You say that every year, you know."

"And every year I hold out hope that someone will listen," her adopted father replied, his golden eyes laughing.

"C'mon, everyone!" Alice weaved her way through them like a butterfly. "This place has to look perfect by the time they wake up."

* * *

A warm sunbeam and the scent of vanilla roused Jacob from a deep, dreamless sleep. He opened his eyes and smiled when he saw Nessie looking right back at him.

"Not a dream?" he said, his voice heavy with sleep. She shook her head against the pillow. "How do you feel?"

"Like I want to kiss you."

He blinked then laughed. "You don't have to ask for permission, Ness. Just go ahead and..." Jacob was cut off by her soft mouth seizing his. He relaxed into the kiss, even escalating it by seeking out the warmth of her tongue with his own. When their lips broke apart, he grinned and stroked the silky hair tumbling over her shoulder. "That's how I want to wake up every morning."

"So do I."

When Nessie moved to kiss him again, Jacob realized, a second too late, that something else had woken up at the touch of her lips. Although he tried to angle his lower body away from hers, it was clear from the widening of her eyes that she'd felt his hard, aching length press against her through their clothes.

"I'm sorry," Jacob immediately apologized.

Nessie put her slender fingers to his mouth, quieting him. "I'm not afraid, Jake. I want you to want me like that." Her hand trailed down his chin, his neck, his chest...all the way down to the waistband of his jeans. "I want you, too."

"Ness..." He swallowed heavily. "If you touch me now, I'm not going to be able to stop."

Her fingers tentatively brushed against the bulge below his waist. "Why would I want you to stop?"

Jacob kissed her again, hard and hot, needing to taste every inch of her mouth. But even as they kissed, his hand circled her wrist, preventing her from going any further.

"Any minute now..." He bit back a groan when Nessie's lips found a weak spot underneath his jaw. "...someone is going to be up here to check on you. Might be your grandfather..." He clenched the sheets with his free hand when her tongue traced the edge of his ear. "Could be your dad..."

Pushing herself up on her elbow, Nessie sighed in acknowledgement. "Fine. But you have to promise..."

Jacob kissed her softly. "We'll continue this. Soon." It took all of his immeasurable strength to roll out of bed. Once standing, he offered her his hand. "Feel like you can walk?"

"Walk?" Pouting, she took his hand. "I was about to fly."

Although her legs were shaky at first, Nessie managed to gather some clothes. She didn't order Jacob out of the room while she changed, but he did turn his back on her...although he nearly gave in to the temptation to look. Twice.

Almost as soon as she was dressed, there was a knock on the door and Alice burst in without warning. "Oh, good. You're decent."

Nessie blinked. "Aunt Alice!"

"There's a surprise waiting for you both downstairs," she said, smiling at the blush on her niece's cheeks. "Hurry!"

When Alice's back was turned, Jacob reached for Nessie's hand again, this time to hold it as they followed her down the hallway.

Before they even reached the stairs, it was obvious that Esme had been cooking, or more specifically, baking. The whole house was filled with the scent of sugar and spices, a warm aroma that Nessie had only ever associated with Christmas and the cookies her grandmother always made.

The cookies that she'd wanted so badly when she and her Aunt Rosalie were in London.

Together, they descended the staircase. When they reached the bottom step, Alice turned around to face them. "Eyes closed," she ordered. "Into the living room."

Jacob smelled something different amidst the mix of cookie scent and vampire stink. Pine. Smoke from a fire. As they shuffled into the living room, he had a fairly good idea of what he might see when he opened his eyes.

And when Alice gave them permission to do so, he immediately grinned to find out he'd been right.

* * *

Nessie gasped at the sight of the whole living room decked out in Christmas glory. Her family stood in the middle of the holly and the lights and the bows. She smiled at them all, tears shimmering in her eyes, but when she landed on her parents, perfectly framed by the green boughs of the Christmas tree, she couldn't hold them back any longer.

"I can't believe this!" she cried. "It's March!"

"We didn't want to wait another nine months," Bella said, moving towards her daughter, Edward on her heels.

Nessie's father nodded. "We missed you this past year, Nessie." He glanced at Jacob. "It wasn't the same without the entire family."

"There's presents!" Alice burst out. "And Esme made her sugar cookies and she's going to make that breakfast casserole you like, Jake, and for the next 24 hours, it will be Christmas in this house!"

"Understood?" Emmett mocked his sister's firm tone.

Jacob shook his head, amused and not a little amazed at the Cullens. "No argument here."

Nessie flew from vampire to vampire, embracing each of the people she loved most in the world until she ended up back at Jacob's side. He put his arm around her shoulder and it was all she needed to make the moment perfect.

* * *

Much later, when the sun began to dip below the horizon once again, Nessie and Jake found themselves curled up in front of the fireplace, enjoying the warmth from the blaze by the light of the tree.

Everyone else, even Edward, had mysteriously disappeared, citing various projects or even hunting as an excuse to give the two of them some time alone in the empty house.

"That's their real Christmas present to me," Nessie said when Jacob pointed this out. "Better than jewelry or books or even the..." She jerked a thumb in the direction of the garage that now housed a white BMW Gran Coupe that was entirely hers.

Jacob held her tighter against his chest. "I'm sorry I don't have anything for you."

She angled her head back to see him. "I don't have anything for you either." A moment passed before she thought better of this. "Actually...I sort of do."

He frowned when Nessie sat up and turned around to face him. "Ness?"

"There is something I want to give you, Jake." She drew in a deep breath. "I lied to you before. About Nahuel." Nessie paused to find the words. "He and I...we never..." She shook her head. "I couldn't."

Jacob stared at her, almost not daring to believe what she was trying to tell him. "Are you saying...?"

"We didn't have sex," she blurted out. Her whole face felt hot and she had to look down at her hands to avoid his eyes. "I never slept with Nahuel."

A few seconds later, Jacob pulled Nessie back into his arms and rested his chin on the top of her head. His whole body seemed more relaxed, like a massive, painful weight had been magically lifted away.

"I'm sorry," she whispered a moment later. "For lying."

"I think I get why you did." He held her tighter. Having come so dangerously close to losing her, he was almost afraid to ever let her go again. "I love you, Ness. Nothing will ever change that."

"But Jake?" Nessie continued a moment later.

"Hmm?"

"I might not be ready just yet," she tilted her head back to let him see the resolve in her eyes, "but I will be soon."

Jacob kissed her softly. "Baby, we have all the time in the world."

* * *

TBC


	31. Chapter 31

Disclaimer: Characters created within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: Abject apologies for the extreme delay. It's been a busy life. I got engaged last month, so wedding plans have taken over my world, and before that…well…without being too cheesy, I was too busy falling in love. But I have a few things to finish before I get married, and this story is one of them. Whether you just started reading or you've been waiting for an update, thank you so much. I hope you enjoy it.

* * *

Winter Moon

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

"Dr. Cullen?"

Without looking up from the medical chart he was reviewing, Carlisle reached for the answer button on his intercom. "Yes?"

Out in the waiting room of his private practice, his secretary informed him, "Your daughter is here to see you."

At this, he smiled softly. Instead of asking which of the four women who posed as his daughters had come to visit him, Carlisle simply set down his pen. "Send her in, please."

Any of them would have been welcome, but seeing his granddaughter enter his office instantly improved his day. Coming around from behind his desk, he greeted her with a gentle embrace and a kiss to her forehead. "This is a pleasant surprise."

Nessie returned the hug. "Hi, Grandpa," she whispered, just in case anyone could overhear them before the door shut completely. Raising her voice, she went on, "Do you have a few minutes?"

"For you, I have hours." Carlisle indicated for her to take one of the two chairs in front of him, while he perched himself on the edge of his desk. "Is everything all right, Nessie?"

Once seated with her book bag at her feet, she blew out a short breath and squared her shoulders. "I've been putting this off for awhile, but I don't think I can anymore. And believe me, I wish I didn't have to bother you with this, because...well, this is really going to be awkward, but you're the only one who can...help." Edward's daughter looked up at him with her mother's human eyes. "Grandpa, I need to know..." She hesitated. "Do you think I would need to use...um...protection if I were to..." Her cheeks flushed pink, but she forged on. "...have sex?"

Carlisle blinked several more times than necessary in the seconds that followed. He wasn't shocked or scandalized, but her question did catch him off guard. Of course he and Esme and Edward wanted Nessie to wait until she was married; it was an old-fashioned mentality that even the modern age in which they lived couldn't shake loose.

But Nessie and Bella and Jake had grown up in a very different world. He should have been expecting this conversation ever since Jake and Nessie had reconciled in March. The fact that they'd waited six months showed restraint on their parts, and Carlisle had to grudgingly give them credit for that.

He was also just the tiniest bit proud of his granddaughter for being responsible and asking these questions before anything happened.

"Well..." Carlisle folded his hands. "It's always a good idea to use protection, Nessie."

"Even if neither of us can catch a disease?"

"I can't hurt," he said mildly.

Nessie frowned. "All right." She paused. "But what about the other thing?"

Carlisle stood up and moved over to the chair next to hers. "Are you certain you want to talk about this with me and not your mother or your grandmother? Your aunts?"

"Grandpa, you've charted my growth and my health since before I was born. You know more about my biology than anyone," she reminded him.

He inclined his chin. "Then, let me ask you...have you had a menstrual cycle?"

Nessie lowered her eyes and shook her head. "That's not a good sign, is it?"

"It could just be a sign that your body isn't ready yet, not that it never will be. It might also mean that you don't operate on a cycle like human women." When she frowned, Carlisle clarified, "Some species don't experience estrous. Perhaps you're one of them. Which would mean that you would be capable of conceiving at any time."

It was a good thing that Edward's ability to read minds only worked at close range. This was not a conversation to which he needed to be privy.

"So...protection?" Nessie asked.

He smiled. "Protection." A moment passed. "Nessie, if you're worried about the future, we can find out what your reproductive situation is. I'm not exactly sure how yet, but I'll find a way."

"The universe chose me for Jacob." Her eyes shimmered. "I have to believe that wouldn't have happened if I couldn't...give him children. Someday," she quickly added. "A long time from now."

Carlisle chuckled. "Yes, let's not test the limits of your father's good will, shall we?"

This prompted a smile from his granddaughter. "Thank you, Grandpa. For not trying to talk me out of it."

"Sweet girl," he cupped her cheek lovingly, "I am not so old that I would ever imagine you aren't perfectly capable of making your own choices when it comes to your body and your heart."

At this, Nessie threw her arms around his neck, burying her face in the crook of his neck. He held Edward and Bella's daughter tightly.

"I love you," she murmured into his starched collar.

Carlisle kissed her temple. "And I love you, Nessie." Drawing back a moment later, he thumbed a tear off her cheek. "Is there anything else you need?"

"Um..." She lifted her shoulders. "Condoms?"

Hiding a smile, he left his office, returning a few minutes later with a small paper bag. "Do you need any instructions or..."

"No! I mean..." Nessie jumped to her feet, grabbed it from him with one hand and picked up her shoulder bag with the other. "No, thank you." Her whole face was pink as she darted for the door. "See you at home!"

Carlisle ran his hand through his blonde locks and quickly decided that when he told Esme about his day, he would leave out the part where he gave their granddaughter a bag of condoms and lubricant.

* * *

When the leaves started to fall from the trees, something shifted between him and Nessie. Jacob could feel it, as surely as he felt the air growing crisper and the rain turning colder, but he waited for her to acknowledge it. He would have waited forever.

Fortunately, he didn't have to.

One night, two weeks after the Cullens started their new school year, Nessie found him in the garage, tinkering with his motorcycle, on his never-ending quest to make it as fast as possible. Noticing her approaching, Jacob set down his tools and picked up a stained rag to wipe off the grease on his hands.

"Hi, gorgeous," he greeted her with a grin.

Ignoring the black streaks and smears on his arms, Nessie kissed him. For a second, he was lost in the familiar warmth and sweetness of her mouth, and when he finally opened his eyes, she was watching him carefully.

"Jake," Nessie whispered. "I think I'm ready."

He didn't need clarification. After swallowing the lump in his throat, Jacob tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear. "You think or you know?"

"I know." She kissed him again, slower this time. Sweeter. He savored every second, as always. "If you're ready...I'm ready."

"Baby, I am so ready." His lower body throbbing, Jacob touched his forehead to hers. "Tell me what will make you happy. I want to do this right."

Nessie smiled. "Take me somewhere special. Somewhere no one with vampire ears can hear us."

"I can do that." He drew back in order to look her in the eyes. "When?"

"Saturday night. Mom is making Dad take her into town to see a movie. No one else will mind if we...disappear."

"Not even Blondie?"

"She won't say anything. She gets it." Nessie brushed her lips against his one final time. "I'm trembling just thinking about it, Jake."

"I promise, Ness...I promise I will make it perfect."

She shook her head, her long curls swaying against her back. "I don't need perfect. I just need you."

* * *

No day in her short life had ever seemed so long. Every minute felt like an hour, every hour felt like a week. Nessie spent most of Saturday morning trying to keep herself busy with television, books, and various projects, but by noon, she was almost ready to burst at the seams.

As if drawn to her anxiety, Bella found her daughter in the kitchen, putting together a grilled cheese sandwich.

"Since when do you eat grilled cheese?" Bella asked as she approached the large, but barely used stove.

"It's not for me. It's for Jake." Nessie struggled to keep any catch out of her voice. "You know it's his favorite."

Her mother leaned against the counter and turned her head in order to see Nessie's face. "Jake's not here. He left before dawn."

"I know," Nessie admitted. "But he'll be back."

Bella smiled and turned her attention to the buttered sandwich her daughter laid in the frying pan. "Your father thinks this isn't possible, but every now and then I swear I get a craving for food."

Nessie nodded absentmindedly, but when Bella reached out and removed the pan from the heat, she protested, "Mom! What are you doing?"

"Trying to have a conversation with my daughter about what's going to happen tonight." Setting the pan on the back burner, she shook her dark hair back and faced the girl, her lips curling up at the sight of Nessie's stricken expression. "Tonight is the night, isn't it?"

Nessie blinked. "How did you...?"

"It wasn't so very long ago that I was thinking up excuses to be alone with your father." Bella laughed when Nessie's cheeks flushed. "And I would have been mortified to have this conversation with Charlie, so I understand what you're feeling right now, but I just want you to know...if you have any questions or need any advice, I'm here. No judgment." She paused. "And your father will never know."

It took Nessie a few minutes, time she spent folding and unfolding her arms while she shifted back forth from foot to foot, but finally her shoulders relaxed a touch, and although her lower lip was caught in the tight grip of her teeth, she nodded at her mother.

"Is that a 'yes, I understand' or a 'yes, I have questions'?" Bella asked.

"Both," Nessie murmured.

"Okay." She held out her hand and waited for Nessie to take it. "Let's talk upstairs."

* * *

"I really appreciate this, Sam." Hauling a heavy crate of candles out of the back of his old friend's truck, Jake shook his head. "After everything you've done to get me here at all..."

Sam didn't need him to finish the thought. He just nodded as he took the crate from Jake. "I'm glad you found your way, Jake. I knew you would."

Just then, Emily came by with little Sammy sleeping in a sling on her back, her arms full of snowy white sheets and blankets. "We're happy to help," she assured him. "But you're certain she's ready for this step?"

"I trust her," Jake replied. "She knows what she wants...and for some reason she still wants me."

When Emily was out of earshot, Sam stepped closer to Jacob. "I don't need to tell you to be careful, do I?"

"I've got it covered." Jacob swore. "That came out wrong."

Laughing, Sam shook his head. "Or right." Setting the crate down on the mossy forest floor, he nodded at the final item taking up space in his truck. "This thing's on loan, Jake. Try not to break it."

"Have you and Emily ever broken one?"

"Emily's not half-vampire," Sam reminded him.

Jacob grabbed one end of the dark wood headboard that made up the large, four-poster bed he'd rented in town. "Just give me a hand. We've only got another couple hours of daylight."

* * *

By the time Jacob arrived at the house, Nessie had talked herself in and out of no less that five different hairstyles. Eventually, she gave up trying to choose and just let her curls fall around her shoulders.

She took her extreme hairstyling as a sign that, despite talking with her mother, she was still a bit nervous. But the anxiety was nowhere near great enough for her to even question her decision. She loved Jake. He loved her. The mistakes and misunderstandings that had kept them apart were where they belonged…in the past. And Nessie had a feeling that the future would be even better than she'd imagined.

Instead of going to the front door, Jacob climbed a tree and knocked on her bedroom window. Her heart pounded when she threw aside the curtains and saw him smiling on the other side of the glass.

"Where are we going?" she asked him as soon as she pushed the window open.

Jacob reached for her hand. "Not far. Just a world away."

After the leap from the windowsill, he began to run, pulling Nessie along with him into the shadows of the forest. She could have gone faster, would have if he'd been in his wolf form, but she kept a step behind him, allowing Jacob to lead her through the woods. After about fifteen minutes, Nessie could see a light up ahead between the trees. They didn't stop running until they reached the source.

In the middle of the forest, surrounded by what seemed like hundreds of candles, there was a large wooden bed. The stark white sheets and pillows stood out in perfect contrast to the browns and greens of the forest, but it was the dusting of red rose petals across them that made Nessie's fingers fly to her mouth in delight.

Blinking back tears, she looked at Jacob. No words needed to be exchanged. He'd promised perfection…and so far, he'd delivered.

Nessie looked back at the fantasy Jacob had brought to life for her. Her nerves were gone.

This was where she and Jake were going to make love.

* * *

TBC


End file.
